and the problem is..........?

This really happened to me when I was triage nurse in the ER...I asked the patient what brought him to the ER. His response was..."Whenever I get out in the cold weather, my nipples get hard and erect and ache a little bit"

had patient complaint of increase lady partsl discharge, discribed it as kinda thick and white.says it only happens after intercourse ( s*x) with her boyfriend:)

can anyone tell me what that could be:)

had a pt come through our ED (i dont work there, my ADN was sharing this story) walks in butt naked...

he yells out "..you gotta do something about my knees! they're killing me!"

...?

Had a young woman walk into the ER totally nude, and very red and in severe pain all over

Diagnoses-----cheap husband, he tried to save some money thta she kept using at tanning salons and built a homemade tanning bed for his wife, well it worked way to well because he put tanning lights in that were 6 times stronger than at the saloon,

Cooked his wifes goose

she later cooked his Im sure

Of course I guess they could use as an indoor BBQ grill.

Hi All,

These are very funny stories. here is one for you.

This happened several years ago as I am not in Floor nursing any longer but still in nursing.

You must all understand the pt walked in.

Pt came in for a diagnostic test .

during admission assesment.

Nurse: do you have any history of previous surgeries.

Pt: Yes. I had my neck fussed to my hip.

Nurse: I do not think that that happened.

PT: Yes it did dr fussed the neck to the hip.

Nurse: pt you are ableto walk normally. There is no way you could walk with that type surgery.

PT: that is what the dr. did.

I tried no to laugh and had to leave the room and go to the break room to recompose myself to finish the H&P. Wife also started laughing at what pt said. Fortunately for me pt also started laughing when he realized wha he said. We did clarify the surgery e actually had.

:chuckle :roll

Originally posted by hogan4736

me: "who is your primary doctor"

patient: "dr. scott"

me: holding back a big sigh... "an ER physician is NOT a PCP"

sean

7 months out of the ER, NOT MISSING IT ONE BIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

but i'll bet you that you were one fun ....... to work with!!!!!

and as far as your quote, dr scott must have a wide spread practice because i have heard pts in this neck of the woods saying the same dr group!

Originally posted by mark_LD_RN

had patient complaint of increase lady partsl discharge, discribed it as kinda thick and white.says it only happens after intercourse ( s*x) with her boyfriend:)

can anyone tell me what that could be:)

hahahahahahaha! lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lmao lmao lmao lmao:chuckle :roll :chuckle

Originally posted by Shed13911

Sometimes you wonder where some people were when God handed out the brains? :D

When god was handing out brains they all thought he said trains and they said.."No thanks, I don't want to go anywhere"..:) Erin

A woman who came through our facility's L and D to have her 5th baby refused to use the bathroom untill she had some Pine-Sol and a scrub brush to clean the toilet.

Apparently she thought you got pregnant off of the toilet and NOT from having sex.....:stone

i swear this is true.... on my own grave

girl comes to the ed - pregnant at age 16 for the third time

so i decide to give the little "dumba$$ why aren't you on bc pills?"

she says - i am allergic - i say - how do you know you are allergic - she says - well they don't work for me - i say how do you know - she says "my mother got pregnant w/ me while she was on them - so she told me to say that i was allergic because they wouldn't work for me either"

gotta love those parents w/ and IQ of 50 procreating all over the place....

i promptly told the young girl that her mother didn't know her butt from a hole in the ground and to get herself to the health department and get some pills.

:banghead:I certainly hope you are right! We called that " a room temperature IQ", but in your case, that may have been too generous!

I asked a woman the other day why she had not given her child anything for the child's fever. Her reply? She didn't want to give her child any medication since she didn't know what was wrong with the child! And she looked at ME like I was the dumbs#$@ for even asking her the question!

Talk about shallow end of the gene pool!

Pam

That Gene Pool needs more Chlorine!

:yeah:Thanks for bumping this thread!!

So funny! It's sad that people really are like that. I love the ones that say, "You are the medical person! YOU tell me why I am here!!" No joke, I have had several elderly folks tell me that. Then they proceed to say it to the doctor, too!

"I think we are taking care of the same people...

They are just travelling from state to state...

Torturing ER nurses across the land."

They are still riding around the nation, looks like.