Please Help - I have no where else to turn

I am so so so sorry this happened to you. I don't know for sure that I would have handled it the same way, but it's highly possible. Having someone threaten to kill me is kind of my breaking point!

Give yourself a little bit of time before you make any lasting decisions. Your emotions are going crazy right now. Just relax and take some time off.

I hope today is much better than yesterday! And I hope your employer reacts with empathy and support.

I am sorry you were hurt to that point of a meltdown by that filthy patient. Another commentor said something like...oh, you should not have let your self get emotionally involved, stay neutral...that is such a contradictory statement! All the nursing management and the whole profession like to tout how caring and compassionate nursing is. To me, you would have to be a little STEPFORD nurse to practice in a manner where "you dont get emotionally involved ". I think when the crazy called you FAT probably took you over the edge. Nothing can hurt a woman more than being called a fat f##k. Take your Fmla, and know I am sending peaceful thoughts your way.

I like to hum or sing a song during situations like this

lots of hugs

Sounds like this incident was the icing on the cake, and you're burnt out. I just wish that you had realized it sooner before jeopardizing your job (which I know, you don't really care about right now since you don't want to go back, but it does jeopardize your nursing future even away from the bedside).

Was this patient A/Ox4, and verbally abusing you? Nothing ticks me off more than when patients who are alert and oriented think it's okay to threaten or verbally abuse staff. It's not okay in society...you would get cited, fined, police involvement, etc, but it's okay in the hospital b/c patients are in pain. That is BS, no excuse. Anyway, tangent lol. When a patient treats me like that, I do tell them that I will not tolerate that (calmly of course), and I tell them that if they continue to do so I will get security to come sit with them at their bedside because people that threaten to harm you (even if it's just a threat), could still harm you (though I have only been threatened once I think from an a/o pt, and I put them in their place). Now if it's a patient with dementia, neuro injury, withdrawal, etc, then that's different altogether.

I am so sorry you went through this, and I hope you can get some time off and work away from the bedside or at least leave on good terms. If you can, I really would try to work your notice so you can leave on good terms if you think you can do it safely.

What a terrible way to walk into work. So sorry that you had to experience this. Hugs hugs and hugs to you! I am young and have only been a nurse for 4 years, so my experience is limited. When I first got out of school a patient told me I was not even competent enough to clean his toilet!! I am still adjusting to this sort of thing! I sometimes feel like I can never do enough or anything right for some of these patients..soo frustrating! I totally support good quality patient driven care, however, sometimes I wish I could tell these demanding patients "This is a hospital and not a resort.."

Hang in there, I hope things get better for you! It's okay to be miserable for a little while :)Then let it go...and know that you are needed and important

If anyone can offer any advise or words of encouragement - I need it now. I am home crying and just feeling terrible

I hope you can check in again so we can help continue to support you most of us have been in that situation in one form or another. Whether we "verbalize" it the way you did or not. I hope you can take some time to step back and re-evaluate and fill yourself back up

Call the police and have her arrested for assault and battery. She will cool off when she is in handcuffs.

JMHO and my NY $0.02.

Lindarn, RN, BSN, CCRN

Somewhere in the PACNW

Find some professional help immediately. You do need help. Hugs to you too. I am a "dinosaur" in nursing. 41 years to be exact. I have learned over the years that when a person throws things, calls names, and then threatens you that you walk out of the room, notify the charge nurse and the nursing supervisor. This patient is a danger to you, the facility, and the patient in the next bed. Do not, I repeat, do not try to talk to or reason with a person who is acting like this lady did. I have had many nights like you had that night. Hang in there. Maybe there is another kind of nursing you will thrive in. Pediatrics, newborn nursery, home care, hospice, etc. Good luck. Let cooler heads prevail. If nursing is truly not for you, there are many other paths that will open to you. When one door shuts, another opens. I also practice yoga and meditation and that has helped me so much. Hugs to you and many blessings will be yours.

Here's a hug. ((((((HUGS))))))

You're in California, according to your profile. Back in 2004, when I was living in CA, I went to the first psychiatrist I could find and went on state disability for stress-related issues. The state paid me 2/3 of my gross pay, and I was able to decompress from all of the emotional turmoil that had been going on in my life during the time I was out on stress leave.

It is hard to be nice to a repulsive patient who is talking to you as if you are dog poop. I cannot blame you for screaming back at her.

My husband works in the insurance industry--worker's comp. He's told me several times that in California, employees can file for worker's comp for work-related stress. It sounds like the op's situation would qualify.

That being said, I would probably have left the room, called the nursing supervisor and perhaps security to deal with this patient, but I do understand the stress and burnout she's experiencing.