Why are patients...?

Why do doctors think that telemetry prevents a patient from coding?

sorry if this upsets any one. i am a newbie on here. I am an 8 year vet as stna 3/4 of the way through lpn school but my question is why do nurses put call lights on when residents want water, taken to Br, of transfered to bed. I know they are busy but if the residents does not have alarm the nurse could taken to br and told to pull light, pouring water from pitcher to cup or transfering to bed does not take that long. ok i guess i will make a lot of enemies know just had to get that off my chest.

When you have a little old lady on the toilet why is it that when you hand them 4 squares of toilet paper they shriek, "Oh honey that's too much!" and they tear it in half? Why is it when you pour half a glass of water for a little old lady they go "Oh honey that's too much!" Well, maam, just drink half of it! Why do they think that the kitchen will be mad at them if they don't eat their cake so they want you to take it home to the kids even if they ate a few bites of it?

You do realize HQ that this is the humor section? I've been a nurse for 32 years. I understand psychological/historical implications of the Great Depression. I was posing my reply in question form as did the OP.

Why can't fully functioning patients move their own cell phones two inches to the left?

Or the kleenex box one quarter of an inch to the left or the right?

Why do troublesome patients come in after you mention their name, or take out their chart? It's like they've felt some disturbance in the "force".

Why does the full moon mean that all my dementia residents take it literally and keep taking off their pants every few minutes?

Why does our toothpaste come in "clean mint flavor"? Seems redundant to specify...who would want "dirty mint flavor"?

Why are our oral care swabs lemon flavored? How many people suck on lemons when they want a clean feeling mouth?

Why is it that every time I have to stick a Foley in a demented, combative LOL, she invariably has the most screwed up anatomy any other burse has ever seen? (Of course, I've seen it before...the last one I popped a Foley in looked that way!)

Why is it that the only times my kids are sick enough to go to the doctor is after I just went through all seven circles of hell the night before at work? I'm sure there have been other parents there who think I'm on crack b/c of how strung out I look by then...

Why is it that my husband always calls me for mundane issues like "what should I make for dinner" when I'm coding or rapid responding a pt? It's like he's psychic.

Conversely, why is it that a pt always decides to go bad when I'm in the middle of a conversation with hubby that starts out along the lines of "I think one of the kids gave the other a concussion..."

Why is it that the sickest pt you have always has the doc you are guaranteed to NOT be able to get ahold of in the middle of the night?