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Discussion

Lost it at Work

We are all stressed out at work due to several nurses out sick. Without giving out too much detail, I pretty much lost it today. We've been working short for a while. I go in to accept report for my assigned pts. I thought It would be better because we would have more nurses. No, found out 3 more called in sick! I didn't feel safe accepting my assignment, especially since I was on day 6 working short-staffed. I wanted a different assignment since I had been working with the most critical patients. Our supervisor resigned, so the only person to contact about this was our DON. Of course, I did do that but she didn't answer the phone, like always. I started cursing (not in front of the pts) about how she (DON) never answers her phone and how much I hate her. Several other nurses were around that I know feel the same way about her but they were wide eyed when they heard me lose my temper (I'm usually quite and accept any assignment with a smile and am very passive). I told them all I would walk out and leave before I accepted my assignment (and meant it at the time). 2 nurses were happy to trade with me but when I finally got in touch with the DON, I simply told her I didn't feel comfortable accepting the assignment today because I felt tired and overworked. She had a problem with that because "we can't just pick and choose which pts we want". She did switch my assigment but I know that I am now on her bad side.

Has anyone ever lost their temper like that at work? I know it was uncalled for. I am just sick and stressed out and sick of working short all the time. S

Sorry for the horrible grammer, I am just so tired and will shortly be working day 7. UGH!

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    • Featured Replies

    I had a meltdown at the nurse's station after a particularly awful 12 hr shift. I was exhausted, worked short all day, had very high acuity patients, got no lunch break (no break at all actually). The oncoming nurse questioned why something insignifigant wasn't done and I lost it. I had just had the worst 12 hr shift of my life and you are coming in BETTER staffed than I was all day long. I have been to the bathroom once today. No lunch and my feet are killing me and you are going to look down your nose at me and have the nerve to ask why I didn't hang up an I&O sheet??? I was going to be there another hour or so trying to catch up on charting. No patients or family were around during my meltdown. I was written up for "unprofessionalism and insubordination".

    What can I say? I am human. I do not make a habit of acting this way, however, I was at my breaking point. I lost it.

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    Ask your DON to come talk with me. You're working overtime, that means privilege dear, to have your pick and stuff. If your DON has a problem with that she needs to address the staffing issues.

    Unless of course everyone else is working overtime too...then it becomes compromise.

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    I had a meltdown at the nurse's station after a particularly awful 12 hr shift. I was exhausted, worked short all day, had very high acuity patients, got no lunch break (no break at all actually). The oncoming nurse questioned why something insignifigant wasn't done and I lost it. I had just had the worst 12 hr shift of my life and you are coming in BETTER staffed than I was all day long. I have been to the bathroom once today. No lunch and my feet are killing me and you are going to look down your nose at me and have the nerve to ask why I didn't hang up an I&O sheet??? I was going to be there another hour or so trying to catch up on charting. No patients or family were around during my meltdown. I was written up for "unprofessionalism and insubordination".

    What can I say? I am human. I do not make a habit of acting this way, however, I was at my breaking point. I lost it.

    Uh, I would have probably quit on the spot when they handed me my write-up over something like THAT. geeeez I had to quit my last job due to disrespect and lack of staffing and lack of appreciation. We all were taken advantage of and I finally decided that I like myself more than that and will not allow someone else to abuse me.

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    she expects us to answer our phones on our off time when we are short-staffed. Yep, she even said that she expects us to and was very aggressive toward that.

    I take call, and I can't count how many times they've tried to call me in when I wasn't on call. I have a million stock "reasons" why I couldn't answer the phone. In your sweetest, most sincere voice, Oh, I'm so sorry, I was ____ (fill in the blank - mowing the yard, in a cell dead zone, in the shower, my battery died, at a doctor's appointment, I left my phone at home or in the car). Pick one.

    Likewise, have a few stock answers ready when you DO answer the phone. I wish I could help but ____ (I have to go out of town, I have an appt that I just can't break again, I already promised to help out at the kids' school). Or you could even be honest. I'm so sorry, I'm just so exhausted from working x days/nights in a row that I'm not certain it would be safe. I've heard rumors that a simple No works as well, but I can't prove that one from past experience.

    Like the others have said, you have to take care of yourself first. God knows administration won't.

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    ((((hugs))))

    I've been there. Sometimes it is us "quiet ones" who lose it the hardest. Then everyone stares in shock that we had that sort of explosion in us!! It happens. Sounds like you had every right.

    As several have said, if you are picking up extra to cover the short staffing, stop. You need to take care of you. Don't let management or your fellow nurses make you feel guilty.

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    I take call, and I can't count how many times they've tried to call me in when I wasn't on call. I have a million stock "reasons" why I couldn't answer the phone. In your sweetest, most sincere voice, Oh, I'm so sorry, I was ____ (fill in the blank - mowing the yard, in a cell dead zone, in the shower, my battery died, at a doctor's appointment, I left my phone at home or in the car). Pick one.

    Likewise, have a few stock answers ready when you DO answer the phone. I wish I could help but ____ (I have to go out of town, I have an appt that I just can't break again, I already promised to help out at the kids' school). Or you could even be honest. I'm so sorry, I'm just so exhausted from working x days/nights in a row that I'm not certain it would be safe. I've heard rumors that a simple No works as well, but I can't prove that one from past experience.

    Like the others have said, you have to take care of yourself first. God knows administration won't.

    I don't believe that you should have to lie. It's your day off- you can't come means you can't come period.

    Having to lie makes it seem like you're guilty by not going in. I am a straightforward person, I like to call it as I see it. If I'm off and don't want to go in except for dire emergencies, then, I shouldn't have to and I won't. I can be mean about that. Use your best baby voice, sulk all you want... that doesn't change a thing.

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    I wish that worked for me, but eventually, I'll give in and go in - because sometimes that's the only way to shut them up. Unfortunately, once you start this, they know they can break you down so they use it against you. I've had managers that the only way you can get them not to argue with you is to have an iron-clad excuse at the ready.

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    • Experts

    I lost it at work once, and I was wise enough to wait until I was in the staff lounge to do it. I was hit with something thrown at me by a patient, and after we got her transferred to our version of the intensive care unit (psych hospital), I went into the staff lounge and swore like a sailor for 10 minutes.

    The techs were impressed at both how I kept my control in public when dealing with the patient, and at what colorful language I knew in private :)

    I also get frustrated when I have to work short-staffed at work, and I have no hesitation about letting my supervisor know and, if necessary, also calling the DON. But I do it very calmly...I save the ******** for the drive home.

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    I wish that worked for me, but eventually, I'll give in and go in - because sometimes that's the only way to shut them up. Unfortunately, once you start this, they know they can break you down so they use it against you. I've had managers that the only way you can get them not to argue with you is to have an iron-clad excuse at the ready.

    Well you shouldn't- especially when you know that you're tired, because if something were to happen they wouldn't recognise that fact. What they would tell you is, you shouldn't have come in, if you were that tired.

    Am I making sense here?It is okay to want to help and truly we should do it more often, but inhelping out, be very careful you're not putting yourself at risk.

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    It's definitely a balancing act. The trick is in convincing our superiors of that.

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    • Guides
    I wish that worked for me, but eventually, I'll give in and go in - because sometimes that's the only way to shut them up. Unfortunately, once you start this, they know they can break you down so they use it against you. I've had managers that the only way you can get them not to argue with you is to have an iron-clad excuse at the ready.

    I'm tending toward the stock excuses, too and not for any reason other than that I'm going to make it as easy on myself as I can when they have no respect for my not-being-paid-to-be-on-call time off! :mad: If I made it into a philosophical argument about my rights, they won't spend a nanosecond listening to it, and it will make my worklife more contentious, I'll have to fend off the guilt trips and "flexible team player" lectures and all that is just damnably unpleasant.

    I guess people may say I am a sell-out or whatever, but I don't honestly feel that I owe people who care exactly zero about my well-being are owed scruptulous Girl Scout honesty. Besides, what I tell them generally falls into a grey area of truth. Having been raised Catholic, my guilt buttons are still hyper-sensitive. :):):)

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    On your days off, chose a "silent" ring tone for your employer or whenever they call, just dump them to voice mail. When you check your messages, just hit delete when you know it's from work. No guilt trips.

    Your days off are for you. Stop going in every time they call you and pretty soon they'll get the hint that you're not an easy target to guilt trip into working OT. Work OT if/when you need it, otherwise enjoy your days off! :lol2:

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