**** I've seen

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Specializes in Telemetry.

Hello allnurses! It's been awhile and I'm glad to be back. I work telemetry now (my unit spans 2 floors at the hospital I work at and we take care a wide variety of oatients including medical telemetry, surgical telemetry, sometimes ICU patients, and stepdown). I've been reflecting over my career the last few days after experiencing/seeing some **** at work. I just want to share some outrageous things I've seen throughout my career as a telemetry nurse, previous correctional nurse, and LTC nurse before that. Please feel free to comment or share. ***Mine are not positive experiences and some are disturbing***

I've seen a confused elderly woman masturbate with BM on her fingers.

I've seen a man successfully commit suicide by tieing his sheets to his cell door and jump off the top tier.

I've seen a man with a lung mass that ruptured drown in his own blood and code.

I've seen the son of a demented and cyanotic patient yell at him and say "You need to get well!". This man had pulmonary fibrosis, 93 years old, liver failing, kidneys failing, heart failing, not getting better for a month, palliative care on board and unable to change plan of care, per son.

I've seen an entire cardiology team sign off on a patient and refuse to put in a pacemaker for a third degree heart block because there was a language barrier when they tried to consent the patient. (Get a translator, Doh!!)

I've seen a 40 something year old male patient admitted 13 times in 12 months for alcohol withdrawal.

I've seen a woman with a hemoglobin of 5.4 bleeding after a total hysterectomy refuse a blood transfusion because she gas hep. C and "dosen't want to give it to anyone" ( umm what???).

I've seen a patient successfully commit suicide 10 minutes after his family left and the sitter was discontinued after psych cleared him and told family they "didn't need to be there 24/7".

I've witnessed a nurse divert meds, get reported to supervisor/management/ state board, continue working and passing narcotics independently, try to divert again, get caught, and ask me to falsify the narcotic count.(I reported it and he's still working, passing meds independently).

I've also seen a nurse infuse plasma, the order was for leukoreduced red blood cells, and she told her orientee that means it "takes out the red".

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Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

Some of the things confused elderly patients do with their poop...

One fellow who seemed alert and oriented on admission was later found rolling his BM into balls and lining them up on the bed table. I asked him why he was doing that, and he replied, "Because I can."

This is really gross: I was walking by a room where another gentleman was about to chow down on a handful of poo. I ran in to stop him and yelled, "NO!! Don't eat that!" Then he looked at his hand incredulously as if seeing it for the first time and said, "Holy hell, I thought it was chocolate!" Thankfully he let me clean him up (he had a reputation for being resistive to care).

Then there was the lady who had a very dry wit and was notorious for pooping only once a week. This was her norm, and she vigorously resisted any intervention to make her go more often. Needless to say, she had some REALLY large BMs, and this one night a CNA called me to the room to see what she'd produced. It must have been 5 pounds' worth, and it was in the shape of an exclamation point. I laughed and said that was the first time I'd seen anything like it.

"Well, I was going for a bow, but didn't make it," she retorted.

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Specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.

I got nothing like this. Ever. But I look forward to peeping in here to see what everyone else has seen.

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Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

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I only saw weird things when I was a jail nurse for about 6 months right out of LVN school - I never even knew there were so many ways to get high - LOL.

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Specializes in Private Duty Pediatrics.

I found my patient's dentures and her roommate's dentures planted in the pot of flowers. I scrubbed them well! Fortunately, they were different enough in size that I got them back to the right people.

I had a little lady in the nursing home tell me she couldn't find her crochet hook ... I found it in the back of her closet, wrapped in toilet paper (clean) and tucked into a box of Kleenex.

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Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
1 hour ago, Kitiger said:

I found my patient's dentures and her roommate's dentures planted in the pot of flowers.

Dentures.

Back in '98, I was working at Mixed Nuts Health Systems and would bring in my guitar from time to time for little sing-a-longs with the clients and staff.

It was late in the day and a couple of staff members and an elderly female client and I were sitting around a therapist's office just chatting and singing a song here and there. The client asked me if I knew "Your Cheatin' Heart" which I did and played while everyone sang along. At the pause between the second verse and refrain, the client began going into a long tirade about how her Ex had cheated on her. I kept strumming my guitar throughout her tirade. When she finished, the whole group, as if on cue, began singing the refrain!

But about the dentures: During one particular song, the client pulled out her dentures, gave a wipe around the rim, scooped up what substance was there, popped it in her mouth and said, "Yum! Mashed potatoes!"

This is an unedited drawing from that time:

dentures 98.jpg
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Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

I find it rather peculiar that I'll be working on an art project, like filing old entries from my journals, when a subject comes up on allnurses which is along the lines of the project on which I'm working.

Back in 2000, I had a cancerous polyp removed from my colon. I did a couple of drawings of some rectal instruments having a conversation and this edited one exemplifies that peculiarity:

1458639835_rectalinstan.png.211238a4922209caa5ec566fdac0d2c7.png

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Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.
44 minutes ago, Davey Do said:

Dentures.

Back in '98, I was working at Mixed Nuts Health Systems and would bring in my guitar from time to time for little sing-a-longs with the clients and staff.

It was late in the day and a couple of staff members and an elderly female client and I were sitting around a therapist's office just chatting and singing a song here and there. The client asked me if I knew "Your Cheatin' Heart" which I did and played while everyone sang along. At the pause between the second verse and refrain, the client began going into a long tirade about how her Ex had cheated on her. I kept strumming my guitar throughout her tirade. When she finished, the whole group, as if on cue, began singing the refrain!

But about the dentures: During one particular song, the client pulled out her dentures, gave a wipe around the rim, scooped up what substance was there, popped it in her mouth and said, "Yum! Mashed potatoes!"

This is an unedited drawing from that time:

dentures 98.jpg

I just threw up in my mouth a little. Dentures are my nursing Kryptonite. EWW!

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