feeling discouraged

I wish she would have clarified exactly what you did that made her feel that way. Would have been nice of her to mentor you.... sorry for the bad experience.

sometime its jut the culture of unit. if you worked in a different unit, they would have just said, "that was bad," or "oh god it was ugly" without attributing fault to any person. so remember at least it was just that nurse making inappropriate comment about your competency. sounds like you did what any nurse would have done. I also want to remind you that sense of "have I done something wrong," that nagging sense in a gut goes away as you get more years of experience in ICU. A year from now, the same thing happen and you won't feel the same way anymore. You just know from your experience that you've done everything accordingly so what happened was not your fault.

First off, WorldDay, thanks for that encouragement that the nagging sense goes away after YEARS, because this week has been a sucker punch and I've felt that three of the four days I've worked.

Lmarti, speaking as a newer nurse and new ICU nurse with just under a month in ICU, I know how you feel. This week I had my first experience knowing that calling for intubation was right even if I was needing a lot of coaching through the process. There are going to be plenty of times when we're going to wish we could go back and change something. Even the most seasoned nurse is going to have moments where something could have been done differently. We just have more because we're new and learning and gaining confidence. Keep asking questions and keeping your eyes and ears open.

I remember a while back there was an article about how we all make mistakes and need to have more compassion towards one another. I'm sorry that happened, but for goodness sakes, you've been on your own only 4 months! I'd say you stepped up, threw on 02, suctioned and got the help you needed. Good job and well done.

thanks for the encouragement ! I want to be a good nurse and would never ever want to put someone in danger

new ICU nurse with just under a month in ICU.

I meant to say just under a month shy of a year in ICU. Looking forward to my one year mark! Thanks to all of the expericed RNs here who have encouraged me and provided valuable articles and information throughout this year.

Hello friend! ICU nurses are smart, resourceful, and usually the cream of the crop...BUT they can be JERKS! Don't you worry! Its ok not to know everything right now. It is obvious that you have an eagerness to do what is right and to learn from your mistakes. You aren't expected to know everything EVER! No one does! Even years from now, there will be times when you think you could have done better. But, that's part of the beauty of nursing!

Just a little story for ya: I'm an ultra-organized nurse. Like, my rooms are clean, my stuff gets done, my lines are straight. When I transferred from Trauma ICU to CVICU at another hospital, I had like a week or two of orientation. One day during orientation, I had to learn the new computer system, I had a combative MR patient pulling stuff out, etc. It was a bad day. I came back from lunch to hear one of the other nurses (with the manager) in my room showing her my tangled lines and talking about my disorganization...haha! We all have our off days and it is what it is. I was quite annoyed for awhile, but soon realized that I needed to blow it off. Now, I'm friends with the little tattle-tale and its just a funny story I give her heck about!

Moral of the story is that it happens to everyone. Its called CRITICAL care for a reason... the nurses are really stinking CRITICAL!

Hang in there! I promise, before too long you will be running that intubation!

Big hugs!!

From how you describe the situation, it sounds like you did the right things. You didn't stare helplessly at the pt, not knowing what to do while the other nurses came in and rescued you both (which has happened to good-but-green nurses!) It's possible that your face looked afraid. But guess what, this kind of thing is scary! With some more experience, you will get to the point where your head knows how serious the situation is, but you will maintain more of an outward calm. You'll be cool as a cucumber.

dont we all wish we could just waltz into an ICU as a newbie and just have all this knowledge and wisdom and confidence?