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Discussion

Feel like giving up (rant)

Sorry to be so negative, but I've gone on 5 interviews and I still can't secure my first nursing job. I got laid off from my job as a CNA a couple of weeks ago, I'm only getting unemployment for now. I still live at home with my parents so it's not so bad. I lost touch with nearly all my friends since I've graduated which stinks. Makes me feel so lonely. I feel like I'm spiraling into a depression. Sometimes I have trouble even getting out of bed and just taking care of myself lately.

The last recruiter I spoke to told me that I come off as very sweet and like a pushover. I appreciate the honesty and constructive criticism, but come on -- someone's gotta give me a chance to prove that I'm not a pushover, that I am strong, and that I can handle whatever challenge comes my way. How can they judge me after only meeting me once??? It's so frustrating and unfair.

I feel like all these rejections are the Universe's way of telling me that I'm not cut out for nursing! That I should just give up now because I don't fit the exact mold... Just because I don't fit into the box of what they think makes a great nurse. Well, they're the ones losing out on a great nurse... =(

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    I know this is a rant, but check our a thread over at Interview help, and First Nursing Job assistance. There were TWO awesome articles that helped a lit if people in your position to get a job after they took some suggestions, also you can reach out to the OP to get tips! Good luck...I had about the same amt of interviews before I landed my first job, and it took me 6 months post licensure to land a job and 8 months post licensure to start the job. You will get there! :)

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    • Author

    I'll definitely check it out, thanks.

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    Don't give up. Many RNs, new grads, those with experience, and RNs returning to the job market are experiencing frustration too. Network with former classmates, and keep applying.

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    Take it or leave it but...

    Stay away from the thoughts of "unfair." It is not unfair; everybody has been facing the same awful job market for years.

    Letting yourself think that it's 'unfair' sets up a victim mentality in your mind... and such can show through much more readily than you might think... and are a hindrance.

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    Just hang in there dear., wait for the right time & right job will b in your pocket.. Don't get disheartened.. I have been giving interviews since last three months,finally got one full time job but had to stay away from my family... Which is very hard,but no pain no gain.., so have Faith in God and you will get there .. Good luck x

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    It's a tough job market, hang in there, the right job is out there! If it makes you feel better, I have been a nurse for 6 years, went on an interview for a case management position I er and didn't get the job because I had a "bleeding heart". I don't have a bleeding heart, but patient advocacy is very important to me, apparently not to them:) good luck in your endeavors!

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    It's a tough job market hang in there, the right job is out there! If it makes you feel better, I have been a nurse for 6 years, went on an interview for a case management position I er and didn't get the job because I had a "bleeding heart". I don't have a bleeding heart, but patient advocacy is very important to me, apparently not to them:) good luck in your endeavors![/quote']

    That's so true, been in nursing since last 17 years... Very compassionate & that's what many interviewers don't like :(

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    • Guides
    The last recruiter I spoke to told me that I come off as very sweet and like a pushover. I appreciate the honesty and constructive criticism, but come on -- someone's gotta give me a chance to prove that I'm not a pushover, that I am strong, and that I can handle whatever challenge comes my way. How can they judge me after only meeting me once??? It's so frustrating and unfair. I feel like all these rejections are the Universe's way of telling me that I'm not cut out for nursing! That I should just give up now because I don't fit the exact mold... Just because I don't fit into the box of what they think makes a great nurse. Well, they're the ones losing out on a great nurse... =(
    )

    Well, no actually. You are completely wrong.You are struggling and I hope you will read this with a note of kindness in the tone, as that is intended in this reply.

    Nobody owes you a chance. Every opening right now has literally hundreds of applications. Why would anyone, in this job environment, pass by applicants who are exactly what the employer is looking for to "give a chance" to someone who isn't? Think about that for a second. Nobody owes you anything here.

    You have been given fantastic feedback and are choosing to whine about the unfairness of it instead of acting on it. Few people are given the gift of feedback post interviews and to not take it and tweak your approach would be so foolish! You obviously look good on paper -five interviews is huge these days. So whatever is going on, you are failing to close the deal during the interview process.

    Here is what I suggest you do:Get good at verbalizing your strengths and your passion. Don't be quiet about it. Ask questions about things at the job, like nurse to patient ratio and how much turnover have they had in the last year. These questions communicate a lot. It shows you aren't hoping for a chance, you are shopping for an employer. Done well, it communicates the ability to speak up on hard issues. It negates the idea of a " push over". Ask questions and have a CONVERSATION, not merely answering questions put to you. Look people in the eye. Smile and seem excited to be there. Shake hands firmly. Have in the back of your mind that you are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you. This automatically takes away the sense of desperation and meekness you are apparently communicating during your interviews, both verbally and nonverbally. At the end, shake hands, look the manager in the eye and state outright you would love to work there.

    Don't get sucked in by "unfair". Once you imagine yourself a victim you have sucked away your own power. Listen to the feedback and change your approach. Nobody owes you a chance. You have to earn it. You are not yet a "good nurse". You are a new grad trying to earn the opportunity to learn to become a good nurse. All you have to offer right now over alllllll the other new grads who want the same thing you do -is the ability to make them want to work with you. You have been told you are failing to do that and you have been told exactly HOW you are failing! That is golden! Five interviews means you look good from afar. Now show them you are a personality that can handle the intense pressure of nursing. Be happy, be confident, be excited, dress appropriately and close the deal. Whatever you do, don't get sucked into "no fair", because no fair is a lie that will keep you from what you want. Nobody ever promised you a chance. You have to earn your spot. You have been told how to do it. Most people don't even get that much.

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    Same boat as you! I've been on five or six interviews, lost count and haven't landed a job yet. I did get one offer in psych but passed on it. I don't think "its the universe's way for telling you, your not cut for nursing!" Stop being so negative and realize this is a learning tool.

    I realized I needed to work on my confidence level since I was projecting low self esteem in the interviews. Now, that I'm working through my issues and realize I can take on the autonomy of being a nurse, I'm sure I will get the next position I interview for!

    You need to realize what your continuously projecting out in the universe and work on it!

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    Just keep trying! Remember that a person chooses whether or not they will like you from the minute they see you. First impressions are important! Also be GENUINE!!! A lot of job seekers are so busy writing out thank you cards and cover letters instead of being real. Work on being likable, which means you need to be vulnerable and honest. When I was hired at the hospital in my city I told the manager that I was kicked out of nursing school due to being sick... that I struggled with the idea of going back to a school that had made me withdrawal for missing TWO DAYS. Then I told her that I humbled myself and went back, because nothing was going to stop me from doing what I was meant to do. This made me vulnerable. She knew a secret, she knew something that could work against me.(No one wants to admit they got kicked out of nursing school!) Many people forget about this very important part of human interaction, to make a real connection with someone... you have to make yourself vulnerable.

    So keep at it! Make sure you are not in a robotic rut of jumping through hoops, but that you are letting employers really get to know you, the real, honest, & raw you! : )

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    Forgive me if this doesn't apply, but from the sound of your post, you live a single life (live at home with parents, unmarried, no kids)? If that is the case, then you have a better chance of landing that first job than the people that do. I know there is job shortage in many areas, but you have the ability to apply and move ANYWHERE there is a job opening. Apply to any and all internships and residencies across the nation, including Alaska. It may not be what you want to do, but it may become something you have to do to remain positive and land that first job. Good Luck!

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    • Author

    Thanks everyone... and you guys are right, I am on a "pity party" and I know I need to stop because it's just gonna become a vicious cycle. There are plenty of people experiencing much worse in their lives than I am. So thank you for the "tough" answers because I need to hear that -- didn't realize how whiny I sounded lol. It's true that if you see yourself as the victim, you give up the control you have over changing the situation. Yeah this situation stinks and it's partly due to the economy too, but I just need to make the choice to work on my confidence, self esteem/insecurities (things within my control). Even if I have to fake it for now, just for the interviews...

    Anyone have any tips for that? I don't want to project that kind of image...

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