Document Everything!

1456: phone call from patient's family member indicating phone giving busy signal for approximately 1 minute and 30 seconds. Transferred phone call to patient room. Will continue to monitor.

1458: patient indicates realization important phone call missed while patient placing dinner order on phone. Assist patient with placing phone call to family member. Will continue to assess.

1459: nursing staff goes postal on patient, removes patient's phone from room and turns off nurse's phone extension for the day. Phone number to be assigned to lazy night shift aide. Delegated pillow therapy to PT for patient's comfort and reported insomnia. Will continue to assess.

1734: patient indicates large appetite upon awakening. Request for order from MD to sprinkle 42 mg Ativan PO on patient's dinner. Order received, see MAR. Will assess for effectiveness.

1823: medication effective. Will continue to assess.

1843: Patient indicated the need to scratch her nose and called for assistance. Was assisted with scratching as needed. Pt and family were educated on alternatives to scratching. Pt demonstrated blowing her nose and disposing of tissue. Will continue to monitor.

1841: Pt. pressed call button with left first digit. Upon response to call light this RN inquired caringly as to her needs. Pt. said, "oops, that was an accident." Bed locked and in low position, side rails up times 3. Call light with in reach.

1842. Pt. again pressed call light. "I'm sorry, I was trying to change the channel." NAD noted. Pt. instructed on appropriate call light usage. Demonstration unnecessary.

1843. Call light misplaced. Pt. denies needs.

1844: Patient has indicated that it is now 3 minutes after the time for the next IV dilaudid dose. Code blue switch believing it was the call bell. Reoriented patient. Educated on call bell usage. Dilaudid administered. MD and pharmacy contacted to determine why 43 mg PO Ativan not effective, and request higher dose. Will continue to assess.

LOL!!!

1734: patient indicates large appetite upon awakening. Request for order from MD to sprinkle 42 mg Ativan PO on patient's dinner. Order received, see MAR. Will assess for effectiveness.

I think my laptop has suffered water damage (from the water flying out of my mouth due to uncontrollable laughter)...Ativan defiinitely is one hell of a drug at that dose!

1845: Continuous pulse ox ordered by MD and implemented by this RN.

1848: Patient found to be logged on to AlllNurses. This nurse, while looking over patient's shoulder, observed patient posting as OP on thread titled "This is what happens when the nurse becomes the patient". This nurse voided (just a little), high-fived patient, and then walked out of room to give report to the next shift. Will continue to monitor via app.

Observed patient's chest wall go up and then go down. Will continue to monitor.

Observed patient's chest wall go up and then go down. Will continue to monitor.

1859: Observed patient's chest wall go up and then go down....second time in three minutes. Will mention this to oncoming shift.....maybe