Well I’ll be!

never be sorry for venting here!!!

I'm pretty much expecting the same when my time finally comes to an end. However, if you look at it in the grand scheme of things this is only one last morsel of fecal matter in the giant poop buffet. You got this and its almost done. Good Job!!! Enjoy your freedom

I’m sooo sorry to hear that. I was on pins & needles those last few days but thankfully, wasn’t selected (and was discharged right around my end date).

I’m currently on vacation, celebrating my “freedom” but had been told that, if selected, I would not be released until the results were back.

Spanked is correct- you’re ALMOST there & this is just the VERY last morsel in the grand scheme of things. But, I know!!! Once you hit your last 1-2 weeks, the days/hours just slowly D-R-A-G by!

congrats!!

Thanks y’all! You’re absolutely right, and I’m normally so patient. My hubby tried to make me feel better about it too. We have a weekend planned that I was hoping to relax a bit and even have a celebratory shot of sake or wine tasting @ Biltmore House, but I’ll have to wait for that part.

My case manager, who I’ve never really talked to since she started a year ago, didn’t even realize my end date was upon us. I guess that’s part of my frustration too, as now I have to wait about a week for test results and paperwork. The previous cm wouldn’t have let it slip, and even though she rode my butt at first, we developed a mutual respect and she personally called me when she resigned. She said I was an “easy” client ?

Speaking of alcohol, I know a lot of nurses do have a problem with drinking, but I never have. NA did not distinguish between drugs. I have found myself mostly at A.A. meetings due to scarce NA meetings in my area, and they always accepted me, but I never identified as an alcoholic. I could never admit that because, quite frankly, it would have been a lie. I have a HUGE respect for these people, and I had the honor of caring for one of our members with 55 years of sobriety who passed away. But I’m going to move on and try not to feel guilty for living my life without that restriction. Has anyone else felt this way?

I am a frequent critic of AA. However, even I, as one who loathes attending meetings, have to readily admit there are some wonderful people in the rooms. They dedicate themselves to helping their fellow humans with no alterior motives what so ever. I don't believe that this is the majority of the folks in there but you gotta give respect to that minority of the people in the rooms.

Hang in there.

Hang in there, friend. Just a few more days. *hug*

Thanks y’all. I’m two days past my “end” date but I still haven’t heard anything. This test usually takes a week, so I figured this would run into next week. In my mind, it’s already over ?

Hang tight and smile you are home free!!!! The door is cracked open soon that sucker opens all the way and you are done with this nonsense

On 10/28/2019 at 8:56 PM, KatmamaRN said:

Thanks y’all! You’re absolutely right, and I’m normally so patient. My hubby tried to make me feel better about it too. We have a weekend planned that I was hoping to relax a bit and even have a celebratory shot of sake or wine tasting @ Biltmore House, but I’ll have to wait for that part.

My case manager, who I’ve never really talked to since she started a year ago, didn’t even realize my end date was upon us. I guess that’s part of my frustration too, as now I have to wait about a week for test results and paperwork. The previous cm wouldn’t have let it slip, and even though she rode my butt at first, we developed a mutual respect and she personally called me when she resigned. She said I was an “easy” client ?

Speaking of alcohol, I know a lot of nurses do have a problem with drinking, but I never have. NA did not distinguish between drugs. I have found myself mostly at A.A. meetings due to scarce NA meetings in my area, and they always accepted me, but I never identified as an alcoholic. I could never admit that because, quite frankly, it would have been a lie. I have a HUGE respect for these people, and I had the honor of caring for one of our members with 55 years of sobriety who passed away. But I’m going to move on and try not to feel guilty for living my life without that restriction. Has anyone else felt this way?

I never had an alcohol problem until I was forced to cold turkey my xanax. After a couple months of withdrawal and just not being able to take it anymore, I started drinking. I kept telling myself it was temporary...until it wasn't. And now I have a pretty bad alcohol problem I never had before at 37 years old. I don't know, I guess I'm just saying be careful.

On 10/28/2019 at 9:56 PM, KatmamaRN said:

Speaking of alcohol, I know a lot of nurses do have a problem with drinking, but I never have. NA did not distinguish between drugs. I have found myself mostly at A.A. meetings due to scarce NA meetings in my area, and they always accepted me, but I never identified as an alcoholic. I could never admit that because, quite frankly, it would have been a lie. I have a HUGE respect for these people, and I had the honor of caring for one of our members with 55 years of sobriety who passed away. But I’m going to move on and try not to feel guilty for living my life without that restriction. Has anyone else felt this way?

@KatmamaRN I attended AA meetings outside my county, just so I didn’t chance running into patients I cared for in the ED. I very rarely drank alcohol before entering Monitoring. It was a specific injectable narcotic that was my DOC. There were no NA meetings available so, I too, attended AA. It was a small group of older ladies who I’ve grown to love & admire. And I was a specimen that fascinated them because I was a “drug addict” and a NURSE, at that! They grew to love me, too, but in their eyes, I was SO much worse off than they ever were because I was addicted to DRUGS, not alcohol ?. I think being in that group was also good for THEM, as they learned that not all people with narcotic addictions are like the homeless junkies portrayed on TV. Many are professionals with spouses, children, homes, jobs, etc.

In response to your question, I plan to live my life free from guilt. While on vacation, yes, I had a glass of wine & a glass of champagne. The wine came first- and it was simply because I COULD (it was 6 days after being d/c’d from a 5 year program). A few days later, a waiter suggested champagne & I had a glass just because I had never tried it before (didn’t care for it, at all). The rest of the trip was just soft drinks, juices, & water.

A funny thing- the morning after I had the wine, when I got up to pee, I thought, “WOW! I’m peeing urine...that’s got etg in it...and it’s OKAY”! ?

Freedom is wonderful! I will always be cautious of triggers, because I actually do have a narcotic addiction w/5 years sobriety. However, I’m going to live my life free of guilt with an occasional drink here & there.

I completely understand & respect Orion’s point. And if ETOH had been allowed in the Monitoring program, who knows, I may have turned to it 5 years ago when I was detoxing from Dilaudid. However, I NEVER EVER EVER want to go through this program again! I was very cautious when I had to take a short-term (approved) narcotic for a fracture while in Monitoring. I switched to ibuprofen ASAP. However, I do trust myself to the occasional drink.

On 10/28/2019 at 8:56 PM, KatmamaRN said:

Thanks y’all! You’re absolutely right, and I’m normally so patient. My hubby tried to make me feel better about it too. We have a weekend planned that I was hoping to relax a bit and even have a celebratory shot of sake or wine tasting @ Biltmore House, but I’ll have to wait for that part.

My case manager, who I’ve never really talked to since she started a year ago, didn’t even realize my end date was upon us. I guess that’s part of my frustration too, as now I have to wait about a week for test results and paperwork. The previous cm wouldn’t have let it slip, and even though she rode my butt at first, we developed a mutual respect and she personally called me when she resigned. She said I was an “easy” client ?

Speaking of alcohol, I know a lot of nurses do have a problem with drinking, but I never have. NA did not distinguish between drugs. I have found myself mostly at A.A. meetings due to scarce NA meetings in my area, and they always accepted me, but I never identified as an alcoholic. I could never admit that because, quite frankly, it would have been a lie. I have a HUGE respect for these people, and I had the honor of caring for one of our members with 55 years of sobriety who passed away. But I’m going to move on and try not to feel guilty for living my life without that restriction. Has anyone else felt this way?

Anytime the Government in IL gets involved count on a major clusterf**k! Most of our governors in IL are only good at making license plates! We are told our nursing license is not a “right” but a “privilege “. What a crock! Totally unfair. We as nurses are judged harshly and held to a higher standard. I wish I knew these facts before choosing this profession. We love our patients and our jobs are not easy. We are not paid what we are worth, oh that’s right, it’s “self rewarding”. Self rewards do not put food on the table.