Terms we will not admit to using

hyopativania

Cletus the fetus...good one!!!

Not sure if anyone listed CTD....circling the drain when a patient is on his/her way to heaven.

BAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAhahaha!! may i just say that i begin nursing school this fall and i've begun studying the small NOVEL of abbreviations that we should be familiar with when we start clinicals...i will be sure to add some of these to that list now :rotfl: thanks!

dadfo -- drunk and done fell over.

JNK -- just needs killing -- reserved for child molesters/abusers/rapers who suddenly have chest pain when arrested.

Idiot with jerk on a rope -- patient who sends family members to desk every 5 minutes for something useless -- like "where's the whatever channel? The washcloth is too rough, do you have softer ones? The bed's hard, can they have a softer mattress? You brought orange juice, but it's from concentrate, don't you have fresh squeezed anywhere? (visitor) "I forgot my medicine, and I was a patient here last year. Can't you look up what I take and give me my medicine so I don't have to go home (1 mile away)." When told there's two pharmacies within walking distance (one across the street in front, 1 across the parking lot behind) they suddenly don't have money -- yet they turn around and order domino's into the room 30 minutes later.....

gomer (get out of my emergency room) elderly, incontinent, confused patient that the nursing home needed a break from and called the ambulance to the er.

sperm poisoning= pregnant

Clean up on aisle 29. (Refers to pt in room 29 has poop all over the place and is finger painting).

I spend a lot of time around disabled kids. I've sometimes thought of the classroom as "The Island of Misfit Toys."

I work in a busy urban ED, with alot of patients with drug issues. Here are a couple of our favorites:

Crackycardia

Hypodilaudidemia

NAPSTER (Needs a place to sleep)

Pleasantly (or unpleasantly) discombobulated (the confused LOL/LOM)

PLBTE = PROBLEMS LAY BETWEEN THE EARS....regarding our ever so loved psych PTs

TPTP To posh to push (Generally associated with FMPS)

CTF Cletus the fetus (those 23 weekers parents expect us to save)

I swear I just about peed myself when I read Cletus the Fetus. I appreciate your sense of humour, even if others might not!