Two Sheds

You must understand that some RNs, myself included, actually WANTED to go into corrections as a first choice. I figured out during my last semester of nursing school that I would rather tear up my license than to work in a hospital environment, and that I would rather have a nursing job "off the beaten path," so to speak. The very first place I applied was the correctional facility where I am now working. I have been here almost 3 years and I love it. I cannot begin to make up some of the funny things I have seen! It's not for everyone--certainly not the faint of heart--but please do not insinuate that any RN who works in corrections is "settling."

I "loud them out," in other words I embarass the hell out of them. MANY an I/M has been the unfortunate recipient of my shaming wisecracks, and they do not do it anymore. Some do, but for the most part, once they're "owned" they knock it off and start trying to shock another, newer nurse. For instance, I was checking vitals in one of our lockdown units, and the guy was supposed to stick his hand out of the door flap so that I could apply my electronic BP cuff. Well, guess what he stuck out instead. I just gave him a "for real?" look and loudly said, "Wow, you sure ruined that myth about black guys and size." ALL of the I/M and COs around him, black and white, laughed so hard they about wet themselves. That I/M now hides from me when I enter the unit. But because I stand up for myself and do not take any nonsense, I have, in a way, earned "cred" with the I/M for having guts. Another instance, I was doing medical screenings in our booking office. This guy comes in, sits down, and runs his hand down the front of his pants, obviously masturbating. I told him to keep his hands in plain view at all times, and he replied, "Aww, I'm just playing." I was like, "Yeah, I KNOW you're playing." I got up, went to my office door, and called to the CO across the room (a room filled with new book-ins, BTW), "Hey, um, I don't know if this guy's jerking off, scratching crabs, or what, but he won't keep his hands out of his pants!" Everyone in the room turned to look at him and I thought this guy was going to die of embarrassment, lol! Fun times....

Partially due to the Florida case where the prison nurses won lawsuits over the COs turning their heads to the inmates jerking off, our facility implemented some changes in the past week or so. If they are blatantly trying to show off their goods or how it works, we can file street charges against said inmate. The end result of this is that not only does the inmate have extra in-house charges against him (earning more time behind bars), but he will have to register as a sex offender for the rest of his LIFE. This was exlained to all of the inmates so that they understand the ramifications in no uncertain terms, but a couple of them have tried to challenge it to see if we're serious. One I/M pulled his "thing" out while I was changing his bandaging (right leg torn up by K9, lol). The CO made note of it, we have it on surveillance, so BAM: 20 years old and he's now a sex offender for the next 40 yrs. Good luck finding a place to rent, buddy. Has any of your jails/prisons implemented such measures? Thanks...

We have SO many fake seizures it's ridiculous! There are 2 inmates who always manage to have "seizures" within 10 minutes of one another, even though they are in different units. We still have not figured that one out. I laughed at y'all's comments about the smelling salts because I have started to use those and they truly are "miracle workers" lol. Personally, I wish we could inform the inmates that "new research" indicates that large-volume enemas are the cure for seizures. But then again, some of them may like that. What's crazy is that we have a couple of inmates who are so predictable that the COs will call us in medical saying, "I/M ____ is going to have a seizure in 5 minutes...just a heads-up." Sure, enough, it happens. And they are such BAD actors! They come out of the "seizure" and they'll be like, "Wh- wh- where am I?" Nauseating, but funny as heck! This is how we outed this one malingerer: the Dr. came to the unit when the emergency was called, and he observed as we stated things like, "I don't know...if it was a real seizure, his jaw would be jutting out more," and the I/M jutted his jaw out. Then we said, "Yeah, his right leg would be at more of an angle" and other ridiculous, fake "symptoms." Every symptom we mentioned, the I/M would start doing. The Dr. finally ordered that next time he has a "seizure," he is to be put into the turtle suit (the green suicide getup) and put into the observation room for 4 hours. That room is FREEZING so it took only 1 time in there for him to be "cured."

I'm an RN, working at a prison medical facility with the Correctional Medicine Division and I love it!!!

Here is the gist of my situation: I am an RN working night shift at a prison infirmary. We rotate positions every few months so that none of the nurses get burned-out doing the same job over and over. My recent rotation to the infirmary has displaced the long-time infirmary RN, who is now doing med-pass (which used to be done only by LPNs). It has been brought to my attention by a few fellow nurses that the former infirmary nurse (I'll call her "Nurse X") is bitter at having to give up "her" infirmary post to me only to be "demoted" to med-pass. No job is considered higher or lower than another--they all equally contribute to the smooth running of our operation. I believe she feels threatened by me, especially since I was recently chosen over her to participate in a program designed to groom shift supervisors. Additonally, the company hired a few more RNs, so Nurse X is no longer the "big fish in a small pond," so to speak. I have never said anything unkind to or about her or anyone else with whom I work. However, I have personally witnessed Nurse X's subtle backstabbing many times. And now that I have "her" infirmary position, it seems that I have been added to her "list." I have noticed that Nurse X seems to gain great satisfaction when, after her constant grilling or meddling, someone looses it and answers her tersely (yes, she treats others this way too). The other nurse will be trying to explain the rationale behind her actions and Nurse X will condecendingly say, "It's OK...just calm down, don't get so defensive." This is always accompanied by a snarky "gotcha" grin and a laugh. Nurse X has taken aim at me lately, and I would like some advice on how to respond to her without making it appear that I'm getting ticked off because that is her goal. My wish is that she will get bored with me and leave me alone to do my job. I suppose I just need more assertiveness training or something, LOL. :-) Thank you!

It sounds like you have a very positive attitude and love what you're doing! It's not everyone's cup of tea, but, as you said, I could never again work in a "regular" hospital again!

How are enjoying it so far? I hated working in a "regular" hospital during school clinicals so I'm really looking forward to something unconventional like this. The other hospitals can take their politicking, "clients," and JCAHO and shove it.

We are provided with 5 sets of scrubs per year free of charge. They are the "Grey's Anatomy" brand in royal blue with our logo embroidered on the upper left side of the scrub top. Pretty sweet!

I heard about some RN openings at the prison from my classmate (we graduated together this past June). I called them up last week and they asked me to come in the next day for an interview, where I was hired on the spot. I start work this Monday, so I guess SC really needs correctional RNs, LOL!

They do here in S.C. I just graduated and passed my NCLEX-RN this past June and I heard about some RN openings at the local prison. I called for an interview and was hired on the spot! They even give you 5 sets of scrubs a year. :-) Good luck!

It would be bad enough for the nurse to have her nail burst through the glove during a DRE, but how do you think the patient would feel, LOL? *slice* "YOW!"

I am to take my NCLEX-RN this Saturday at 2pm, and I'm wondering if the "trick" would work on a non-workday. If it would work on Saturday, how long should I wait after coming home to give it a try? I've heard some people say it worked for them right when they got home, and some folks said a couple hours. Also, the thing where you pay $7.95 48 hours later to see your official results: is that in "business days" or would Sunday count? Wish me luck! :-)

I have Asperger's Syndrome (high-functioning autism) and I'm in my last year of nursing school (7 more months, yay!). I have been upfront with the admins about my condition and I have testing accommodations. So far, my instructors have all agreed that my A.S. does not appear to be getting in the way of my becoming a successful nurse. I need to work a bit more on my social skills--I can become so singularly focused on the task at hand that I sometimes forget to talk to the patients, but other than that everything is going well. I just have to "remind" myself to chat with the patients ("how are you feeling today, Mrs. Smith?" etc)

Haha, I got "owned" on a message board by spelling "firstly" incorrectly, LOL! :-) Darn it, that's what happens when one (or more!) of my 3 kitties tries to vie for my attention by walking around the keyboard while I'm trying to type, hahaha! One of those "D'oh!" moments, I suppose. :-)