Offended by Prayer

I have no religion; but I do believe in God. I would LOVE it if someone prayed over me no matter what their faith is as long as it was done with my best interest at heart.

I am pretty tied to my own religiou but if somebody with a different religion than mine prayed for me I wouldn't mind. It is the thought that counts

I have no religion; but I do believe in God. I would LOVE it if someone prayed over me no matter what their faith is as long as it was done with my best interest at heart.

What if they were offended that they weren't prayed for?

No one can expect something to happen if they don't ask for it. And if it is very important to them, they would designate a person to do so. If they asked me to say something for them, I would.

It isn't about hurt feelings. It's offensive in the way it would be to feed pork to a Jewish client with severe dementia. Yeah, she might not care in her state, but it's still not right.

I'm just saying, you have to think about what you're saying. Maybe a lot of us would appreciate the kindness, but asking the Christian God to make a place for you in Heaven is pretty important. There are more appropriate ways to go about saying a prayer/kind thought for the person. :)

It isn't about hurt feelings. It's offensive in the way it would be to feed pork to a Jewish client with severe dementia. Yeah, she might not care in her state, but it's still not right.

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While I agree with the above scenario, I'm not sure you can compare feeding pork to a living woman is the same as me silently uttering a prayer regarding a person's death. To even think that when/if I go to church and say a prayer for someone that I may be offending them without their knowledge when doing so is ludicrious to me, I guess.

Can the same case be made for other cultural/religious acts? If someone from another culture puts herbs on my head, or bows to me, should I be offended? I'm not; I'm usually humbled that this person chose to do this for me even though I don't believe in it necessarily.

While I agree with the above scenario, I'm not sure you can compare feeding pork to a living woman is the same as me silently uttering a prayer regarding a person's death. To even think that when/if I go to church and say a prayer for someone that I may be offending them without their knowledge when doing so is ludicrious to me, I guess.

Can the same case be made for other cultural/religious acts? If someone from another culture puts herbs on my head, or bows to me, should I be offended? I'm not; I'm usually humbled that this person chose to do this for me even though I don't believe in it necessarily.

Putting herbs on your head, maybe. Bowing, now. B/c that is a sign of respect. Like I said, it's the context of that prayer. There are more appropriate prayers that wouldn't be offensive to people. So why not be respectful? It's not asking that much to pray about something other than their afterlife, is it?

I am greek orthodox so the chances of a nurse saying a prayer that would appeal to my specific religion is small. But I would feel so blessed that this nurse took a few mintues out of her day to remember me in prayer. I wouldn't care if she was jewish, buddah, or whatever. I would also have no problem as nurse sitting with a patient who is on the verge of passing and praying or whatever their religion did prior to death. As nurses we treat different kinds of people everyday and most of them probably have different beliefs than we do but in the end of life we need to put all the differences aside and deal with what is about to happen. If i felt it necessary to say a prayer after a pt has died than i will. if family was in the room then I would say it silently. Prayer after death is considered a celebration/remembrance of life. why would anyone not want their life remembered or celebrated????????

Just my 2 cents

Kris

I am curious to know if you would be offended, after death if someone were to say a prayer over you.

I would really like to hear from as many Agnostic or Atheist as possible.

I recently began saying a prayer over anyone that dies in my presence. Many times I do not know if the person had a religious preference or not. I am curious to know if people would be offended if they knew someone was going to pray over them when they die.

here is the prayer

Dear Lord not our will but yours. Into thine hands we commend the spirit of this peaceful child of God. Prepare a place for him/her Now in Your Heavenly Kingdom!

I would want to be prayed for. Your intentions are known by the patient- good or ill. Whether or not they have passed on, I don't think it's inappropriate to pray for the patient. I pray silently for a lot of my patients- if they ask me to pray with them, I will aloud, but only on request. I wouldn't force someone to participate in such an intimate thing as prayer, but how could it be bad to pray for a patient? While not all, I think most people (especially in my area) believe in a higher power or some sort- in death it seems most appropriate to pray to the higher power to help that person. As nurses (or nursing students), we want to care for a person throughout their process- once they leave the world, we can no longer be with them to help heal their pain. It seems helpful to both the patient and even ourselves to hand this burden over to One we feel can still be with and care for the patient.

Peace,

Hangel:)

I am curious to know if you would be offended, after death if someone were to say a prayer over you.

No, I wouldn't be offended. I'd only be upset if the people who knew my religious preferences didn't follow through with my wishes before death.

I don't want people praying over me in any religious way, and I want religion left out of my service (my family knows that). But I wouldn't be offended because I know the intention is good and kind.

Seems pretty respectful to me but I would be a little uneasy saying it if I knew nothing about the family's beliefs.

Now for me, I wouldn't be offended in any way. I'm dead. It's for you.

BUT here's a story for you...something to think about....

Cared for an Indian woman who died of liver failure. Lots of family there. Gave family some time with her...they did alot of praying and rituals according to their culture. We asked them to step out so we could get her cleaned up, tubes out etc. All left but eldest son insisted on staying. Fine. Sat in a chair. A nurse was helping me, when another nurse walks in. This nurse always would go into patients rooms who had died and say a prayer over them. Most of us found it a little annoying and a bit weird, but hey....if that's your thing....Anyway, the son became so upset and out of control yelling at her about the praying I thought he'd smack her. She apologized profusely.....he was still angry but settled down...however he went and got family again and they prayed all over. I don't really understand what happened and why he was insulted...I don't know the culture much, or if it was cultural at all....but that nurse really curbed the bedside prayers after that experience. For what it's worth......

I would not be offended at all, whether a Christian, Jew, Wiccan - whomever wanted to say a prayer or good thought for me and those I've left behind. I can see how some would not want such a thing, so maybe it's best to do it quietly or "in your mind", as I often pray (though I'm not a church-goer, I do have beliefs and believe in prayer).

I'm attending a Catholic college and by chance am doing clinicals at a Catholic hospital. Often our clinical instructor will have a prayer at the end of pre-conference (at first I wondered if it was a "God, please help the patients I'm about to unleash these new students on!" LOL) and those of us that want to stay, can. If we don't, that's fine also. Most of the instructors at the school are Roman Catholic, and I've found it very comforting to find prayer a good part of my life again.

As part of my learning, I must ask each of my patients if they are spiritual or have any religious preference. Many, even in a Catholic hospital, say no, but do tell me I can say a prayer for them, or even just think good thoughts. I do as they ask.