I've been waiting for....

Ugh, gah, can I relate to you!!!

I've been on light duty since I had shoulder surgery, so I've been in the front of the ER checking people in over the last few weeks. I get SO annoyed when people say,"Um, how much longer is it going to be? They have called 2 people ahead of me and I've been here 3 hours!! My back pain is excruciating!"

I have started responding to that..."Sir, you have been here a little over an hour. We calculate all of our times so I'm looking at it right now. Also, we do not take patients back based on who is in the most pain. We have to take sicker patients back first"

And it also drives me crazy when this back pain has been going on 3 weeks and I am his nurse and he's demanding pain medicine.

I understand people are in pain. I really, REALLY do. But usually you aren't my sickest patient and I have to prioritize.

(told you I could relate!)

They always seem to round up to the next big time increment. For instance, 5 minutes in reality is 30 minutes according to the patient. 30 minutes is an hour. An hour is 2 hours. I'm not sure if this is because they REALLY think it's been that long (maybe there is some kind of time perception vortex inside the exam room), or if they think we're so stupid we can't even look at the big electronic bulletin board which prominently displays the wait time for each individual patient.

Oh, and yes, those "been having abdominal pain for ten days, no I haven't taken any Tylenol or Motrin for pain, hurry up and make with the narcotics!" patients are funny. Like I'm going to just wave my magic wand and make it all happen instantly. Sorry, you've waited ten days, you haven't even had the presence of mind to take an over the counter pain reliever/Pepto/Maalox at home that entire time, and now you think you can't wait a little longer? Sorry, you're going to have to see the doctor first. And then they get all huffy! Too funny!

Oh you bad,bad nurses, where is your compassion?

That's what I love about allnurses, a safe place to vent.

Just had a patients son go ballistic on me yesterday because I could not tell him the EXACT time his father would be discharged. I really do not get why people cannot understand that medical care is not like ordering at a restaurant where it is first come first served.

I'm trying to quantify the Perception of Time Formula.

I think it's something like this:

Time in hours since onset x 1.15 for each minute spent calling 15 family members (to get advice, figure out how to sue the person/animal/inanimate object responsible for your boo boo, commiserate on the inconvenience, etc.) x 1.75 for each additional family member present in the ED.

Same reason they say "all i had was 2 beers" and "i don't do drugs so how could i test positive for benzos, opiates and thc"

emtb2rn "Same reason they say "all i had was 2 beers" and "i don't do drugs so how could i test positive for benzos, opiates and thc"

Or the "virgin" with pelvic pain who is pregnant