Having a bad day

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Specializes in med-surg 5 years geriatrics 12 years.

Hate is a terrible thing; I have railed against it much of my life. But today I truly hate.....I HATE cancer. My spouse has been bravely battling colon cancer with mets for 3 years; and now cancer has the upper hand. He is tired and grey. And today, God forgive me, I find myself wishing it was over on one hand and dreading when that day does on the other. I take comfort in knowing those of you reading this post will understand. My wish for you is that you hold your loved ones a bit closer for a short while. And thanks to all for just being there. Kathy

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Specializes in ICU.

Time like this one can be tough on a person and there spirit. My thoughts are with you and your family.

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you are not wrong to feel that way, you are human. be with him as much as you can and cherish the time you have left. you wont regret it.

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Specializes in school RN, CNA Instructor, M/S.

Kathy My husband has a long term disability (disc replacement Sx gone wrong, pain and all that stuff) so I feel connected with what you are going thru. Please know that you and your family are in my family's prayers. If you EVER need to vent ***** whine cry whatever it is just PM me and I will listen and support you Please don't hesitate to reach out. Enjoy the good times and those will be the memories you two can reminisce about. Share the love only you and your husband can know. God Bless Both of You!

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{{{Kathy and her husband}}}

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Specializes in Cardiac, Hospice, Float pool, Med/Peds.

My first husband died from a brain tumor and I know how you feel. You want him to live, of course; but feel like you cannot get on with your life until he dies. I felt the same way and part of me was guilty; but the other part was not...

My husband lasted 18 months when they gave him 9 and when he did die; I fell apart. I never thought that I could get on with my life. He has been dead 6 years and I am married again. I know; you never think you will find love again, but you will. I think that my first husand sent me my current husband...

I have no words to ease things because nothing I say can; just try to enjoy each day; sunset, laugh, smile, hug etc...

I am sorry you and your husband have to go through this. Two of the smartest things that he said before he died were; "I have the easy part of dying and you have the hard part of picking up the pieces... And; you will get married again and be happy."

Hugs to you...

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Specializes in med-surg 5 years geriatrics 12 years.

Thanks guys; it helps immensely to just get the words out in print. Will make actually talking about it much easier. Again,thanks to all. It means a lot to just know you understand. Kathy

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Specializes in Med-Surg.

I perfectly understand. It's tough watching someone you love suffer and it's a loving thing to not want them to suffer long.

Hugs.

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