Charting Bloopers

foley's are great for stopping nosebleeds, the balloon works miracles

And in other uses for foleys- patient in for labor induction had foley bulb inserted to assist in dilating cervix. Patient (not a genius in human anatomy) "What happens when I have to go pee?" (apparently women only have one orifice down there)

And then there are the male patients who have the "no" checked on their med history next to "hysterectomy." Whew, that's good to know.

I always like to test the new admits who seem like know it alls or seekers by asking (males) about hysterectomies and (females) about their prostate health. I am usually right, and it is amazing how many women have severe prostate problems!

I once read: "Lungs congested. Sound like wind rustling through Autumn leaves." LOL.

I always like to test the new admits who seem like know it alls or seekers by asking (males) about hysterectomies and (females) about their prostate health. I am usually right, and it is amazing how many women have severe prostate problems!

When I was in school, 2 or 3 of my patients had grandmothers who died of prostate cancer.

yesterday, at the hospital, i was reading a patient's h&p. the following was charted:

"the patient is homeless, severedly depressed and was talking to his hands. he is incompetent of urine. he was admitted from jail but the reason he was incinerated is unknown."

:rotfl: lmao

my fav is

"pt pleasantly confused"

and the time one of our male nurses charted that he examined mr smiths lady parts

I was taught in school to chart "pleasantly confused", that's not a blooper. Opposed to confused and hitting and screaming, she is pleasant and confused...

I was taught in school to chart "pleasantly confused", that's not a blooper. Opposed to confused and hitting and screaming, she is pleasant and confused...

One I've seen a lot is "pleasantly demented".

One of my favorites was written by a Canadian physician. He stated that the pt had "fantastic morbid obesity." I understand that technically fantastic means bizarre or unusual, but in the U.S. the word has a positive connotation, usually describing something that is really good. When I read that note, I remember thinking "There is nothing fantastic about that pt's weight!"

I am also always amused by the doctors' notes that say PERRLA for blind patients & "CV: RRR, no murmurs" on pts w/ A Fib who clearly have an irregular rate or pts w/ very loud, obvious heart murmurs.

I once saw a pap smear ordered on a man. Does that actually exist somewhere? I thought it was pretty hilarious. And, no, the pt was not a transvestite or a hermaphrodite.

One of my favorites was written by a Canadian physician. He stated that the pt had "fantastic morbid obesity." I understand that technically fantastic means bizarre or unusual, but in the U.S. the word has a positive connotation, usually describing something that is really good. When I read that note, I remember thinking "There is nothing fantastic about that pt's weight!"

I am also always amused by the doctors' notes that say PERRLA for blind patients & "CV: RRR, no murmurs" on pts w/ A Fib who clearly have an irregular rate or pts w/ very loud, obvious heart murmurs.

I giggled. :yelclap:

lmao, I was about to say something then realized you were talking about NICU baaa ha hahha!