Would you have done more?

[Clovery]

I just on my way back from picking my 3 yr old up from summer camp and driving past an assisted living facility. I don't know too much about this place but I believe it is 100% assisted living apartments and definitely not a nursing home. I had just turned the corner and saw an elderly woman with a rolling walker (the kind with a seat) attempting to cross a somewhat busy road without a crosswalk. From what I saw she kept advancing into the road and then stepping back since the cars weren't stopping.

I immediately pulled over and blocked her path, rolled down the window and asked if she was okay. She said "What? and then I said "Are you okay? Do you need help crossing the street?" She replied that she was trying to cross the road so she could walk on the sidewalk on the other side. (The road had no sidewalk on the side she was on). She said she didn't need help and thanked me for stopping. I noticed she had a lanyard around her neck with a button on it. (A life alert device maybe?) At the same time a woman in an SUV pulled up from the facility's parking lot and started yelling "Mom! Get back here!" She could have easily jumped out and grabbed the woman.

And then... I drove off. And I'm seriously questioning my judgment. I had my 3 year old in the car and it was a hot summer day. And I don't really know what people in assisted living are "allowed" to do and not. If this was an elopement or she often took walks on her own. There was a custard/water ice place across the street and up a block. Other than that I don't know where she would be walking to.

What would you have done?

[valpo_rn01]

My 90 year old grandmother lives in a retirement apartment. She goes out to walk all the time, and frequently crosses a busy street to get an ice cream cone at McDonald's. She's independent in her ADLs and is absolutely allowed to leave the facility at will. Just the other day, someone stopped to offer her a ride, and boy was she insulted!! I tried to explain that someone was just trying to be nice to an old lady, but she was having none of it. It was nice of you to stop, but if she refused your help and didn't seem confused, I don't think you are obligated to pursue it further.

[ICURN3020]

Duplicate post

[ICURN3020]

I think you did the right thing. You stopped to make sure she was okay and then when a family member arrived, you left.

A situation like this happened to me once when my young child and I were walking across a parking lot to enter a mall. A woman was lying on the curb of the entrance with a significant open, bleeding head wound. As we approached, I asked the woman standing with her what had happened. Apparently she had slipped and fallen on some ice.

If I would have been alone, I would have intervened without hesitation. However, since I had my five year old with me, my first and foremost concern was my child's safety and the fact that a scene like that may be traumatic for them. I offered to call 911, but was told they had already been contacted. We then heard their sirens approaching and I took my child and proceeded into the building. I talked to my child about the situation afterwards.

You and your child's safety should be the absolute number one priority in situations like this.

[RN403, BSN, RN]

I agree with the above posters. I think you did all that you could have. I think you did a lot more than what most people would do, anyway. Others might not have even bothered to stop at all.

[Clovery]

Thanks for the replies. I *had* to drive by that place again this evening. I don't know what I was looking for... bloodstains on the road? But there was no scene to be seen. I called a friend who works with assisted living and asked if they are allowed to go out for walks and she said yes as long as they're not on a locked unit. It was just out of the ordinary since I drive by this place almost daily and I've never seen a pedestrian.

I think if I had been alone I would have driven her back to the main entrance/office. My main concern was that she really was exercising poor judgment trying to cross that street (45 mph speed limit) close to rush hour without a traffic light or anything. Now I just wonder what was going on..

[icuRNmaggie, BSN, RN]

This happens a lot. Confused people wander.

Call 911. I stop if the person is in imminent danger or if it's 20 degrees out and they don't have a coat.

Use common sense, if the person looks dangerous they might have a weapon so go with your gut feeling. Every situation is different.

Someone near and dear to me with advanced alzheimers disease left the NH on a Sunday afternoon and crossed a five lane highway. Thank God someone saw him and called the police.