Nurses Humor
Published Aug 9, 2007
FranEMTnurse, CNA, LPN, EMT-I
3,619 Posts
Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts so much I can't stand it. I guess I'd better see a doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a doctor."
So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart"
That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog,urine samples from his wife and daughter, and some semen for good measure.
Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results.
He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
(Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. Now if you don't rest that elbow it will never get better.
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart
Chaya, ASN, RN
932 Posts
Took me a few days to find this but thanks for the chuckle, Fran!
Chaya:)
SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN
10,263 Posts
HAH!
I love it!
MedSurgeMess
985 Posts
:lol2::lol2:
ROFLMAO!!!! That was too funny!
traumajunkiegirl
22 Posts
ROFLMAO but ill never remember all that !
PeachyERNurse, BSN, RN
315 Posts
Lol!!!
rebmem
93 Posts
This is hilarious.........just what I need --- funny, funny, funny (helps me forget about not passing NCLEX).