catz

yup zoe aint no pleaseing them, get accused of lieing either way and ggrrr. yeh that thread was real good for suppor wasne it. ((((((((((zoebobody))))))))

its so sad when we have to let them go isnt it. thats y i got the 2nd cat whitney is well getting on, i canot survive without a cat but once she goes ill not be able to get another one so got one now. plus they company for each other. im sorry u lost one of yours. deression sucks.im sorry your dragging down there too, and i do hope they do manage to do sumat wiht your meds. it aint no fun when ya can hardly stand yourself i know. as for me its an act, im trying to convinve myself im fine whenim so far form it well ya know the story lol. i had a very nice mega up 2mths over the summer and i want that back now lol. the docs still arent listening to me, or dont believe me or summat. apparently cos i used to be a nurse im spoosed to be able to identify exactly how i feel and why i feel like that. so im mega pissed off wiht them lol. so i hvae nicely locked myself away in my own little place, avoiding all my usual hangouts online and avoiding everyone as much as i can irl too. but at the same time im not as depressed as i have been, and i havent completly given up yet.

yep im the one ya remember :) cat people are fun hehe thats y there are so many of us. (cept im really regretting getting a second cat now lol) how ya doing?

*waves* thought id stick my hea din say hello and see who is new and who remembers me :) hows things going folks?

exactly!!! i wish that everyone could understand this. dsh is a maladaptive coping mechanism and a person does not have to have a pd in order to use it. it saddens me that this is still the assumption among so many mental health professionals. sax i hope things work out for u, dont let them get u down.

that al u need to remember, if u hadnt seen her u wudnt have known. she is competent and clearly stable at work, if u notice her competency or work slipping then approach her or her supervisor but otherwise respect her privacy, her confidentiality and her trust. im glad u can see that she isnt a danger to others just cs she is a cutter. and may i say thank you for being openminded enuff to come here and ask about a situation u were uncomfortable with and keeping an open mind :)

y wud drugs and alcohol be involved? just curious, and yes she is a danger to herself but it is necessary t weigh up how much of a danger, yes that is a lot of stitches to nedd but she did go to er n seek the attention she needed....thats a good sign. and self injury does not indicate a risk of suicide, it merely indicates a maladaptive way of coping with things.

unfortunatley in the uk u do. if u dont and they find out u are liable .cant remember all the legal stuff bt it is an offense to not disclose a past illness.

yep thats all u can do. let her know ur there for her. i know people who are both nurses and cutters. if her problems arent interfering with her work now id say its unlikely they would interfre with her nursing, her supervisors are aware of her problem and are likely unobtrusively keeping a close eye on her. if her work starts to be affected they will be onto her straight away. i can feel ur frustration n anxiety about it though, it is hard to know someone is struggling and stand back n do nothing.

go see the psychiatrist. u will have to tell occy health when applying for a job, but u have at least a year b4 that hurdle. the main obstacle is wat ur symptons are adn wat if ny dx they give u. i was on antidepressants when i got my first job, and started seeing a councillor while i was working. occy health will work with u. as for the unis, they have tough reglations for letting people on, thank dear bev allitt for that. the nhs also has the two year rule BUT it is not intended as a deffinite thing and depending on ur illness and treatment the majority of nhs occy health deparments will just keep an eye on u so to speak and wont prevent iu from accepting a job. im sorry ur struggling btw. the only reason the uni would kick u off so to speak is if u are becoming unsafe/ failing placements etc etc. they are much mor elikely to suggest a break, a year out or watever if it becomes necessary and let u continue from were u were on the course as long as u are mostly mentally better. have i confused u? feel free to pm me ny questions or watever, ill answer if i can. but dont not get treatment in case it affects ur future prospects, untreated u will be a lot mor elikely to have to quit/not get a job than treated.

my guess then would be that she is not borderline.....but i dont know her soo. i have got friends who are borderline, one whom i posted about here last year lol. she is so imo very typically borerline and i have ad to mostly cut contact wiht her to mantain my own mental health. does ur colleague know that u know she cuts? if she does maybe u could manage to let her know that if she wants to talk or nything she is welcome to come to u, she mite well tell u wat if ny dxes she has been given. most borderline pts (imo) are pretty much unabe to function well, cant hold down jobs, cant deal with people without having arguments and hating them etc etc. it is highly possible she suffers from plain old depression, or has in the past, and discovered si as a coping mechanism. it can be very hard to let go of a coping mechanism that works when all else seems to fail. i would say if her supervisor is aware of her cutting he is keeping an eye on her and if she was to start being not "normal" would soon suggest she had time of.got treatment again etc. let us know how things go:) its nce to hear about someone who has difficulties and is functioning in a stressful job im not getting across wat i want to well sorry. there are a few good threads in this forum with a wealth f info about bpd.

NO not all self injurers have bpd!!!!!!!!!!!! bpd is often dxed because self injury is one of the symptons but also often it is misdxed just because a person cuts. yes a person can hurt themselves without being borderline. does she see things in black n white? is she always right or worng? can she see the inbetween? does she either like someone or hate them? do her moods swing frequently? if not dont assume she is bpd just because she cuts. u are priviledged that she let u kow about this, she must trust u, dont hassle her about it, when she is ready she will get treatment, if her cutting seems to be escalating and causing more problems/interfering with her work then sugest that she gets treatment again, but dont pressure her into it. some people can and do function very effectively in the world while still cutting. it is a coping mechanism, alleit an unhealthy one. like thunderhead said, some people drink, some people cut.

i trained in sheffield, and worked at the childrens hospital. now live bout 45mins away but am their regularly since my friends sytill live their. feel free to add me to your pm list too :)

if u think thats low try having a look at wat we get paid in the uk lol

i know this is old but i wanted to reply, i worked on a paed daycare ward. we discharged our kids as soon as they were fully recovered from surgery/anaesthia/epidural/premed effects etc. the child was required to come back to the ward from recovery, normally fully conscious and ready for a drink ( the wake up so quick). some would have a drink and go back to sleep, some would have a drink want food, want to play. once back on the ward we had to keep them a minimum of two hours during which they need to stay awake and alert, they must have drank and kept down at least two separate glasses of fluids and ideally something to eat. they must be up and moving relatively normally again esp if had epidural or blocks. they must have pain controlled well, with analgesia if needed. and for some surgeries (circumcision, hyspadius) they must pass urine. also vital signs must stay stable at half hourly intervals and no problems with wounds. if they meet all that criteria they can be discharged after two hours. if the nurses were not happy to discharge and parents were not willing to stay at just the nurses discretion we got drs to come down. we had an average of maybe one child a day that needed admitting to an inpatient ward though if afternoon surgery lists ran late we admitted more kids since we closed at 7pm.

thanks baby, yeah psych wards are very very differnt. this friend also likes normal wards to though lol, she has epilepsy but she has sussed that if she says she has this many fits a day they will admit her for obs. she never ever has fits in there. ( and she is known to most of the ambulance drivers and er staf as a faker) thanks for the encouragement, i am learning about bpd, i didt no nything bout it till i started researching n reading a few months ago. im finding psych very interesting......mite even consider retraining n doing psych nursing sted of paeds when i get round to going back to work.

thank you evienne, i havent seen her in about 3 weeks, after her latest drama. i suspect she isnt talking to me cos i didnt jump but i dont need her hassle in my life so when i move in a few weeks i wont give her my new details and she wont be able to get in touch. i have to look after me and she wants more than a friend from me. i cant be more. baby, psych isnt my speciality either, but the attraction to hospital is that they are then responsible for her life. 4meals a day cooked ready, no washing up, no chores no bills to pay no rent to pay etc etc etc. here the good old nhs takes care of the costs. lus company 24 hrs a day 7 days a week. thats the attraction i think. heck it even appeals to me occasionally, no responsibility........

thank you, i have managed to step back from her, i have explained repeatedly that i wont rescue her etc etc. tonite she had another crisis, she called me at 1am to say shed gotten into trouble were she lives n staff were evicting her. she didnt no wat she wanted me to do about it lol. i suspect staff merely told her to go away till she had calmed down, as they have done b4. i refused to let er come stay with me and she hung the phone up. no doubt she will be fine again in the morning when she gets up but boy do i feel guilty. ill check out that website , thanks :)

this site has some good info and links re self injury http://www.annaleahy.com/pages/4/

thanks, i think having written esays everywhere that is the decision i have come to, i cant make her do nything, i know that and i cant stand back n watch were she is heading so i gotta walk away.......which saddens me. were is the magic wand that makes everything right?

have pmed u

i have a good friend. she is borderline. i have known this all along. so far it hasnt caused ny problems between us. i have set limits with her all along, she knows her staying overnite at my house, or us spending times together are conditional to my limits, i dont let her get away with manipulating me, or lieing to me. i pull her on it. if she starts pushing too far i tell her n warn her i will leave if she doesnt stop, and i follow through. so far this has worked. last time she was admitted, she had a new psychiatrist, he discharged her after 5 days. she went back to er the next day to try and get admitted again n they sent her home. she does not keep follow up appointments, she has been offered counselling and hasnt attended. she will not go to groups. now her manipulation and lies have gotten her into trouble legally. she must attend probabtion appointments and accept treatment offered or she will go to prison, the psychiatrist that evaluated her for court did not feel compulsory hospitalisation would be beneficial to her so unless he changes his mind its not gonna happen even though she wants that course of action. she is determined not to go to probation appointments, not to go to psychiatric appointments with her usual psychiatrist cos she doesnt like him, and if this court psychiatrist offers to treat her she says she isnt gonna attend those appointments either. i have ensured she knows wat the consequences of her not complying with probabtion will be, i have told her i can be supportive and i will try and help her. i have also told her that she has to be the one to accept the help and comply, that i cannot and will not force her to attend things, and that i will not stand by and watch her mess up big time. i have told her if she does not attend her first probabtion appointment i will walk away from her alltogether. i cant make her do wat she is sposed to, i know that. am i doing the rite thing? is there nything else i can do? nyone got ny ideas? sorry this is so long

thanks sorry i was forgettin were i was. k ive had most the oast 12mths off work, sick notes say depression and anxiety. saw psychiatrist, did all the usual psychiatric questions etc etc. and queried ptsd and gad, but hasnt as far as i know made ny official dx. they have now (12mths later lol) decided to send me to a psychologist. good idea maybe but she wants to do a psychological assessment which i assume is somewat different to the psychiatric thing. she is a psychologist, not a psychiatrist or a psychotherapist. so ny ideas?

whats involved when carried out by a psychologist?

i saw methotrexate used weekly im for juvenile rhumatoid(sp) arthritis