Foreign Objects in Body Cavities

NICE! There's a winner for you. :)

The long and short of it (no pun intended).. patient came in with a rather large cucumber in his rectum. We got it out.. he wanted it back.. everything was a bit garbled.. something about him being a vegetarian.. *shudder*

Ok, this one came to me from another nurse, but I'll share it with you....

A man and his partner had gotten drunk (and/or high) and had poured cement into the rectum of one. Well, you guessed it....they passed out!

And now that you're all waiting with bated breath.....yes, cement WILL harden in the rectum and yes, it does require surgery for removal and yes, it did cause significant damage!

You just have to ask yourself, "At what point did this seem like a good idea?"??? LOL

Discharge Instrucions: Refrain From Placing Cucumbers And Beerbottles In Any Oriface Above Waist

Probably should read 'below the waist'

Just my opinion.....

I met an ER nurse from Kansas City and one night while she was on duty a woman came in with a German Shepard...let me clarify, she was on the German Shepard.

Don't people go to jail for things like that?

I must be stupid, but could somebody please explain to me how this woman could get "stuck"? The nurse was completely serious when she told this to me and I was so shocked I didn't think to ask how she could be "stuck". :uhoh21:

I've heard that some male animal reproductive "members" don't exactly resemble the male human's, but a dog's? What the @#$*? (believe it or not, I got an "A" in anatomy).

Sorry, if this is strange subject matter (considering the other posts on this thread I guess it's not too bizarre), but I'm curious. :imbar

Mmm. I've heard about two dogs getting stuck, so I suppose it's possible. But I don't know much about canine anatomy.

Nothing surprises me.

OK, first, I am not a pervert.:chuckle I lived next to a dog breeder for a while. Dogs have a part of their "member" that swells like a bulb. I'm not sure what it is called ball? Anyhow, this makes it easier for dogs to breed with other DOGS. It kind of keeps them there for sometimes up to an hour until blood flow returns to normal. (There is really no way to describe this that sounds decent. I am really struggling here.) This would be my guess on how they get humans "stuck". Augh GROSSSSSS! There is division amongst species for good reason. So noone gets stuck humping a dog.

OK, first, I am not a pervert.:chuckle I lived next to a dog breeder for a while. Dogs have a part of their "member" that swells like a bulb. I'm not sure what it is called ball? Anyhow, this makes it easier for dogs to breed with other DOGS. It kind of keeps them there for sometimes up to an hour until blood flow returns to normal. (There is really no way to describe this that sounds decent. I am really struggling here.) This would be my guess on how they get humans "stuck". Augh GROSSSSSS! There is division amongst species for good reason. So noone gets stuck humping a dog.

I'll now get a good night's sleep! Thanks ang75 for clearing things up! :chuckle Your explanation actually makes sense. I was thinking something along that line, but I wasn't feeling confident enough to guess.

Now ang,one more question for you...how did they get her "unstuck"? Feel free to be creative with your answer!!!!!!!

:rotfl:

I'll now get a good night's sleep! Thanks ang75 for clearing things up! :chuckle Your explanation actually makes sense. I was thinking something along that line, but I wasn't feeling confident enough to guess.

Now ang,one more question for you...how did they get her "unstuck"? Feel free to be creative with your answer!!!!!!!

:rotfl:

We had two dogs stuck together once. We just sprayed them with the hose and it seemed to do the trick. Animal version of a cold shower :rotfl:

Sure the dating life's been on the dry side at time, but i won't date out of my own species.

We had a FF that had a problem with getting a (glass) vase stuck up his bum, to the point of the GI surgeon having to remove it a few times. Ironically, the pt. seemed to have a problem with bathtubs as well, since he always said that he slipped in the tub and fell on the vase. Uh sure, buddy, whatever you say.

Could that doggie have been on Viagra perchance? :)

I had a pt who had an overwhelming desire to eat phone books. Not all in one piece but page by page until it was all in. He was always coming in with bowel obstructions.