Feeling discouraged :'(

Don't be discouraged. You haven't even been a nurse for a year yet. Book knowledge and clinical knowledge are two different things. It takes years upon years to build clinical knowledge...it won't happen over night. You called a rapid response and more experienced nurses took over...good job. That's the purpose of the rapid response..you prevented the patient from coding. I've been a nurse for four years and feel pretty comfortable now as an ICU nurse. However, I got my start on a very busy cardiac telemetry/step-down unit. The first year...no one knows what they're doing, but you learn. Hang in there. You recognized something wrong with your patient and addressed it by calling a rapid response.

It seems as if experienced nurses forgot they were new nurses. Some act as if they had no problems starting. They act like they knew everything. I want to remind them t times.

And you know what else? I haven't even had to call an RR on my patient and I haven't even witnessed a code, let alone had my own patient code (now that I've said it...) so you're one up on me, I'm dreading that day!

Thank you everyone for your encouraging words and advice. I am my own worst enemy and am very hard on myself. I feel like I'm on stage and everything I do is judged and critiqued. I do think that some experienced nurses have forgotten that feeling of being new and unsure of yourself. I do talk to the nurse who precepted me and she is encouraging. A lot of the nurses that I work with say I'm better and that I really asked a lot of questions when I started. That kind makes me feel like I ask too many, which I won't stop doing. I think besides my anxiety; what other nurses think of my performance is one of my biggest obstacles. I go to work and am nice to every one but don't engage in bashing my co workers I just listen quietly and wonder what they are saying about me when I'm not around. I've been off the last two days and am working to tonight so I wonder what has been said about my performance during that rapid response. Anyway thanks to all for your words. They help and I will reflect on them when those negative thoughts start entering in.

Back in the 90's when I graduated they told us, "it will take a year before you feel confident and well-rounded." They lied. It takes twenty. :)

I'm on my second year as a RN and realized I felt much the same way as you, then felt really confident, and now that I know much more (and still barely anything), I go home each night wondering what I forgot to do/chart or wake up with that 'Oh no, I forgot such and such'. I understand the 20yrs comment