when you don't feel like you did enough

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Just looking to express some feelings and see if anyone has some words of wisdom. I'm a new nurse (less than 6 months in the hospital) working with oncology pts. I love my job, but tonight i came home just feeling like i didn't do enough. I had a relatively heavy assignment and completed all my tasks, but i just feel like i wasn't that great of a nurse. I had one of my favorite patients who is having a rough time going through her treatment... She was trying to talk to me about her life (i totally LOVE opportunities to talk to my pts about non-cancer things!!!!) But i was so busy i feel like i almost blew her off. Another pt threw up a bunch of times unnecessarily bc the docs were in a code and i couldn't get an order for meds for him... That kinda stuff. Nothing life our death, but i just felt like crap going home. I know i probably have super high expectations of myself as a nurse so that's why i feel so bad. Is this common? Anyone ever feel this way?

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Don't beat yourself up, especially over things that are beyond your control. You did your best.

Sometimes if I feel bad going home, I try to think of things that I could have changed to make the situation better. Sometimes there are lessons to be learned and sometimes you have to just accept that you did everything you could. You are one person with two hands and there are just certain things in life and in our jobs that we cannot control. Did you do everything you could? Of course. Stop worrying about it. Once you get into the swing of things, your good days will greatly outnumber your bad.

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That's most days for me. It happens to everyone. We just keep moving forward and hope to do better next time.

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I felt that way just the other day....really busy, end of shift, knowing I was not giving my patients as much help, attention, answering questions, as I normally would.

Yet as soon as I through about your question and thought about replying I thought....realized ? ..... that maybe I think I am some super powerful nurse.....I think these patient's can't possibly function, survive, without me, their super nurse, giving them 100% great nursing care. And immediately thought, geeze of course they can function, survive, without me, they do have their own capabilities, power, even without "Super Nures" (me) giving them care.

To me it is kind of like thinking only I have the power to help them; they, their families, friends, even other nurses, can't, or won't, do as good a job as I do.

So my thought is, relax, do the best you can, but don't beat yourself up, your patients are stronger than you think, they do have their own power to survive, endure, without you "Super Nurse" there giving them 100% care.

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What I can say is that I felt incredibly depressed following the Oncology Clinical rotation at my school. It's so sad to see the patients who are just learning they have cancer.. & it's Stage IV. It seems like it would be a sad unit to work on, but I'm glad that you are trying your best and please be gracious and compassionate with yourself too. I'm sure that the patients appreciate you weather you (or even they) know it or not. Take care.

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Specializes in ER, SANE, Home Health, Forensic.

The very fact that you are posting here and acknowledging your feelings shows you are a far better nurse than you think. Some days are like that. It's the days that are not that keep us coming back. Your patients that know you know you did your best.

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I know this is a couple weeks later, but thanks for your words. Glad to know I"m not alone and even what everyone has said helps me to process the emotions I'm experiencing better. Best wishes to you all!

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