Does anyone else get really nervous before a shift?

Lets just say I use to arrive 30 minutes before my shift started so that I could mentally "prepare." Perfectly normal!!

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I feel like I'm just not getting this stuff yet. I'm better organized than I was day one on the job, but there is too much 'gray area' on this floor! Actual policies aside, I can never get a straight, consistent answer from other nurses on what to do in certain situations, especially when dealing with unpleasant or insulting patients.

I look at my peeps I need to see at start of shift and try to prioritize them, but they all have extensive meds or cares that make the order I see them nearly a moot point.

What scares me though, is how quickly I became the type of nurse I never wanted to be: bitter, resentful of my patients at times, short tempered, suspicious of patients that I feel may be narc-seeking. I'm not even at my one year mark off orientation yet!

My shifts having me feeling like I'm holding my breath for twelve hours straight as tasks pile on me, and relief is the only description I have for knowing I don't come back the next night. Not 'hey, I get a day off, what will I do?' But actual relief that I can mentally and physically be disengaged for an evening.

All I do is race from one task to another, not fully absorbing the reasons WHY my patient is having certain symptoms or getting certain tx.

I'm already tired of the constant battle of wills with patients, their families and on coming nurses that question every little thing you did or did not do over night. It's exhausting.

WOW!! These are words that have come out of my mouth. My feelings exactly! I'm starting to think I'm getting burnt out I don't know if I have the strength to keep pushing forward in my current position.

I feel the same way! Pretty much the same way

I can relate to you since I have been a nurse for last 7 months now. As I start walking towards the hospital, I feel the anxiety. There are couple of things that helps me. On my way, I "intentionally" smile a few times and take some deep breaths. Then, I remind myself I am going to help my patients today and that will be awesome. I arrive to work at east 15-20 mins early because I hate feeling rushed. Also, one cannot assume traffic is always the same and so, it always helps to head to work early. Becoming friends or friendly with your fellow RNs goes a long way. Being new, I have not hung out with other RNs outside of work but I am always friendly to them and give them a hand whenever they need. In return, every one has been helpful to me. Although we each have our own assignments, we are a team after all and having the team spirit has been a great help to me for the last 7 months in facing the anxiety. On another note, I think little bit anxiety & stress is good as it keeps us alert and on our "toes".