Being a bundle of nerves causing problems
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I'm in my third semester of nursing school and I'm not doing well at all in clinical. I feel like I'm so worried about making a mistake that I'm making more than I should. These last two weeks felt the worst.
To quote my instructor "You're not inspiring confidence in your patients." She also went on to suggest that if it was anxiety that maybe I should consider going on medication. I don't like that idea, even though it is most likely a useful suggestion.
I don't know what it is, the moment I know they are in the room, I feel like I want to impress her, but at the same time I draw an outright blank on what to do next. Then I keep questioning myself if I'm doing something right or wrong. It ends in either a mistake or looking, in my opinion, stupid. My instructor also told me today that one of my patients had told her that he didn't think I was going to make it.
Today's events were just the icing on the cake. My patient for the day, while being gotten out of bed by PT, saw a pill on her bed and took it. I remember her saying that she thought she dropped one when I gave them to her, I saw her look in her hand as well as reach down beside her and heard her say that no she didn't. Trusting soul that I am did not look at her hand to confirm. When questioned by my instructor I relayed the same story. However when they questioned my patient she claimed that she didn't say anything about dropping a pill. My instructor then told me that my patient either has a slight form of dementia or I'm lying about the pill. Given the tone of her voice and my none too stellar performance over the previous three weeks, I would be willing to bed she believes I'm lying about the pill.
Needless to say, I'm really torn up about continuing in the program. I'm looking for some helpful hints, or words of encouragement.