Am I crazy or what?

Okay, so, the months are going to pass whether you decide to do what you're doing now or whether you get thru your NCLEX and pursue work as an RN. Why did you go to school to begin with? Pull from that motivation and build some momentum to get through the licensing exam and start interviewing for the jobs you want. Sadly there will be BS and bureaucracy wherever you go and whatever you do. You just have to stay strong, stand up for yourself, and wade through it all to meet your goals AND help support your family. You can do this. You said it's been 6 months since graduation. Now, where do you want to be in the next 6 months?

I don't know why you are letting yourself freak out over this so much....isn't this why you went through the hell of nursing school in the first place? Surely you didn't find out AFTER you graduated what you might find in the world of nursing employment?

It's hard to imagine that anyone on a message board is going to be able to provide the motivation you need, if in six months YOU haven't found it yourself. Don't take this as an insult, please, but maybe a session or two with a licensed psychotherapist might help you delve into the real reason you are procrastinating so badly? It looks like there's alot more than just 'nerves' over becoming a nurse at play here, imo.

I understand where youre coming from with the bs and "bullying" but you need to learn to ignore it and look at the positives. It really doesnt matter whether you do nursing or any other job because there will always be those types of people in the workplace. It is up to you to stay away from those types and people and surround yourself with people that make you feel good/comfortable. If nursing is not for you, that is fine but to quit it because of what others may think of you is bogus. I agree with the other poster. Maybe a meeting with a counselor or psychiatrist may help bring out some deeper feelings about this. If this is not the case, i suggest you move forward. There are so many positives to nursing and worrying about the negatives is a waste of your time frankly. Also, you cant let what a few students have said or what a few crappy nurses have done to change your ENTIRE mind frame. There is going to be a job out there for you and only you but you have to be willing to look.

You have 2 choices take the NCLEX or don't. You have nothing to lose by going for it! One step at a time. Take the first step and pass the NCLEX. Then worry about the next step. One day at a time! Then, its up to you. You could work per diem to see if you like the staff at different facilities, and if you do, then persue more hours. If not move on and try another place.

I could have attached my name to what you wrote, exactly a number of things in common. Three words of advice, Don't Give Up. God Bless You. We are in the same boat. But we can row on.

You will always face people who are not going to be kind to you the world is filled with all types of individuals and personlaities. I think we've all at one point inour lives faced with tought situation but my experinces always proved that there are more good people than bad in this world. Face your fear and go forward you will succeed. Don't let the fear take over. You won't lose anything by taking the nclex. You have spent so many years of schooling now it is the time to get your reward. If you need some nclex materials I can email them to you.

Take care and trust in God

Karen

Take the test. Nobody says you have to work in a specific type of nursing. If you pass. Good. If you don't pass, you can view it as a learning experience and retake or you can decide it is not worth the hassle. Right now you are "shoulding" yourself to death, worrying about things that might not happen.

There are nurses out there who decided after nursing school not to nurse. There are lawyers who passed the Bar and decided law was not for them. There are doctors who have passed boards and never practiced. You could become one of those. Or you can allow your fears to immobilize you so you never take the test. I know there are lawyers like that, I suspect there are nurses and doctors like that also.

It is only a test. it is not a once in a lifetime opportunity. You are allowing it to control your life. Take away its power. Take the test.

i'd say go for it :-)

don't distract yourself with every excuses you can think of, we all have done that..

instead, think of all the sleepless nights of study, the money you invested and the people counting on you.

let that be your motivation :-)

good luck reptilechick :-)

I realize that a single post on this thread wont change anything.... just grasping at straws I guess!! Thank you all for taking the time to comment and post, I appreciate every one of you and will take your advice to heart.