I did it. The thing I was sure wouldn't happen. A med error.

So stressed I can't eat or sleep. Don't want to live with this kind of stress. I want to know how the patient is and what is

being said and done, but then again I don't want to know. I don't want to wait until my next shift. So scared.

If this is how it is going to be, I don't want to do this job.

PLEASE tell me someone else has felt this way before and has stuck with it and become more confident and capable. I have to have the income, and training for a different job just isn't in the cards right now. Sacrificed too much to have this one.

help help help help help help help

Mom: What happened? more details needed..and Breathe

Did anyone die? Is anyone going to be incapacitated because of the error? If not, YOU MUST RELAX. There isn't a nurse out there who hasn't made a med error. Anyone who tells you different is plain lying.

Deep breath and tell us what happened.

Ditto, I have made several in 16 years... last one, was last month. Gave IV Rocephin on a verbal order to someone with a PCN allergy. Could have killed him dead on the spot. Nothing happened. Wrote it up, so that others in procedure labs wouldn't make the same mistake... before the time out, before the allergies were looked at. Who gives meds after 16 years without looking at allergies.... umn, me:eek:.

I knew better, got in a routine... and could have killed someone. The difference is that I know what I did that was wrong, I knew to immediately try to avert consequences... and can live with myself, because unfortunately, no matter how much more attention I give, as a human, I'll make another mistake. That difference is acceptance, doesn't mean I care any less, sure as heck I'll remember it forever... but I'll never do that again. So the next time, and every time after that, I'll practice smarter.

It happens to everyone, even us dinosaurs. Only those that say they never have, are the dangerous ones. Talk to a nurse mentor whom you trust. Talk to a nurse in another unit... talk to a pharmacist... but address your fears, forgive yourself. And consider... when I made this med error, I immediately informed the patient, doctor present, apologized, and explained my frequent monitoring for his safety.

Patient and I had a long talk about him being more aware of his allergies, and demanding nurses to ask them prior to having any medication put in his body. He learned we are not perfect and how to protect himself from us. That is important as well.

No one is going to die or suffer permanent injury because of my mistake, or because of my slow (but careful) reaction to the emergent situation before it. So... ok, one breath :-)

I talked it over with my supervisors immediately afterwards. ... another breath

I learned specific things that I will never do again. (trying to gain perspective, here)

still feeling ashamed/embarrassed. and a little frightened that somehow this will still all come down on my head. feeling like a failure.

your words do help, though. thanks for the replies

i made a med error recently....

like 5 weeks on orientation. Oh my gosh was it such a reality check and a kick in the gut....

I was feeling way too confident with my med pass I suppose and gave 3x the med.... it wasn't anything that would really hurt the pt, and he needed it anyway....

The doctor came by 3 hrs later and changed the med to IV anyway, so my preceptor and I didn't write anything up.

I hope I never have to feel that way again... it was awful

No one is going to die or suffer permanent injury because of my mistake, or because of my slow (but careful) reaction to the emergent situation before it. So... ok, one breath :-)

I talked it over with my supervisors immediately afterwards. ... another breath

I learned specific things that I will never do again. (trying to gain perspective, here)

still feeling ashamed/embarrassed. and a little frightened that somehow this will still all come down on my head. feeling like a failure.

your words do help, though. thanks for the replies

This is a hard thing to accept in nursing, where errors literally can be life and death, but you will learn more by making mistakes than you will by doing things right. Will you make this mistake again? Doubt it. If you hadn't realized the error, would you have done it again because you thought it was right? Probably.

A process can't be perfected unless errors are made. No question, we want those errors to be minimal and not life-threatening, but even those sentinal events we hear about have led to changes that prevent further errors.

You'll be fine. Your pt will be fine. You learned a big lesson and you won't make this error again. YOU'LL BE FINE.

The first time I ever let the ball drop and was nearly beside myself, the director of nursing--who is absolutely amazing-- said "Oh my god, it's the end of the world! No one has ever made a mistake of this magnitude before!" I stood there stunned. Then she asked, "Did anyone die?" Uh.. no? "Okay, so who was horribly injured?" No one? "All right then. I could say something about this, but I honestly couldn't say anything you don't already know. Everyone makes mistakes. Learn from it and stop beating yourself up over it."

Trust me, there are some times when I still feel like I'm the stupidest person in the world after a shift. You will have days like that too! But you know what, there will be many other time you'll feel like you really did something amazing that day. I like to think those experiences far outweigh the negative.

Also, I hope that this eliminates the naivety of "I was sure this would never happen" as you said in your first line. We all make mistakes. Just keep them in perspective and learn from them.