vwbeetle

Here are a few tips to draw a line that you won't tolerate an abuse at work. If any of the preceptor makes any comments that are abusive, inappropriate, or rude while no one else is there; simply say `Would you repeat what you just said in front of everyone?` If someone rolls over her eyes right in front of you, you can say sth like, `Why are you rolling your eye balls like?` When you show them that you won't put up with intimidation, they normally back-off. I think it's far safer to set up your boundary in the very beginning rather than letting things escalate to the point it causes anxiety or it effects your work. You can TOTALLY do it. I really really wish you all the best.

Dear ChinupBSNRN, I am genuinely happy for that your manager contacted you, asking you to reconsider your resignation. I hope you will be able to return to this position and give yourself an opportunity to gain your experience; of course, given that she puts you with a different preceptor. I don't think there are too many managers who would have gone out of her(his) way to have a new employee who just quit, to come back to the team. That's a really really good sign that she genuinely cares about her team. In most cases, even if the managers are aware of the problems, they'd not done anything to avoid getting involved. As for that devil preceptor, if you do decide to go back, I strongly encourage you to not let this person intimidate you again. I know it's so much easier said than being done, however, you can TOTALLY do it. If I can handle bullies, you sure can. If you can get some advice from someone who's in social work, counselling,...or even books on dealing with these so-called difficult people, I'm sure you'll be able to handle these spiteful people at workplace. You made MY DAY, for sharing this latest news on your case; I really hope you'll be able to return to that job and work in a safer environment. Yes, please keep us posted.

Hi ChinupBSNRN, You are not a failure. I'm terribly sorry about what you had to put up with; that is a mega psychological harrassment. I had a very similar experience with the person who was supposed to train the new employee, not bully. I have to say, from reading your message, that your ex-preceptor and my ex-manager did the exact same thing. The only difference is that I was at a very small company where it was literally me and her all day. Personally, I think you did the best by removing yourself from that environment. Each time my ex-manager bullied me, I told her, "Look, I can't work efficiently when you talk to me like that. It's counter-productive." I remember her face changing and getting very defensive..."Oh, I'm not upset at you. It's nothing personal." However, each time I finish a project, she'd say "I know you double-checked, but I'm sure I'll be able to find mistakes here. Don't worry." Some women are naturally-born vindictive, like this one and your ex-preceptor. Eventually, she did me a huge favour; she let me go with the reason "not a good match." She was really evil; when I worked there, she was already 5 months pregnant and a chain-smoker. It was one of the most abusive 6 weeks I had to put up with, in my career life. I remember crying the entire weekend and I went to chat with my friend, a social worker. I had very similar symptoms from what you went through. Give yourself some time to completely heal from this; like someone already said, treat yourself with something you like. Good luck with your new job, and I hope you'll find the right niche for yourself. Take care, vwbeetle Remember, the problem was not you...it was that horrible ex-preceptor. What comes around goes around.

OK, I see. I misunderstood and thought the preceptorship program exists instead of probation period in the hospital settings. Thank you for clarifying this in such a short time.

Hello everyone, I saw a job posting for newly grads nursing recruitment at one of the large hospital near where I live. They seem to be hiring quite a few in several departments. All of them indicates "6 weeks of preceptorship program" They all appear to be what we call "floor nursing". Isn't 6 weeks a bit too short for someone fresh out of a school? Don't most jobs, outside of nursing, give you average 3 months of probation? I had a chance to speak to one of the nurse who happens to work there. "In the past, when I started, they'd put the newly grad nurse with an experienced nurse until he/she gets comfortable with the new job. Nowadays, due to short staffing, the hospital just make you start working immediately on your own." What are most typical length of a preceptorship program in your region?

Read this article: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/11/when-the-nurse-is-a-bully/

I agree with 79tango. If you are ready to get the fxxx outta there anytime soon and at the same time you feel they are about to fire you, then I don't see why they'd want you to be there for another 2wks. Give them your resignation letter and I'm sure the HR will arrange so that you can leave anytime soon. Good luck at your new job.

It's such a sad reality, I find. A friend of mine was an IT technician at a local children's hospital where she was terminated a few yrs ago. From her story, the HR sided with her manager who told them a falsified information; accused her of sth she never did. Luckily, she found a better job, but I can totally imagine how these hospital HR can side with the nurse managements if similar things happen.

Most administrative jobs don't look at where you got your degrees from. If EAP (employee assistance program) service providers is sth you like, you might wanna apply to those places. They always hire coordinators, administrators. That's all I can think of, for now. Good luck with your transition.

I don't think your shape and size matters so much. However, I hear a lot about back injuries after long years in nursing. I think it's more important in making sure we use a proper positioning when working; like bending your knees rather than bending your back. Of course, a regular workout would help a lot. When I had to see a physiotherapist, she emphasized a lot on never bending my back to lift sth. There was an article about an owner of a moving company who was interviewed. He mentioned that he has a young woman who's about 5 feet and average. She uses a proper positioning when lifting boxes. She's been there several years without any back injuries. Of course, patients probably weigh more than most moving boxes, however, I thought it's important that we all use the same strategy and use the correct body posture when lifting patients and beds. My 2cents.

Hi Sarah, Thank you so much for your response and for your document. I downloaded it so that I can take time to read it. You as well as everyone who replied to me, truly made my day / my weekend. I'll keep my chin up and go for it! I'm sure so many of those who posted a message here for an advice appreciate your response. Thank you again, vwbeetle

SageSarah, Would you believe if I say your message touches me emotionally? Well, it sure did, and I thank you as well as all of you who replied to this thread for pointing out a lot of important things. SageSarah, yes, I don't know what it is, but something kept me go through all the hurdles of getting into the nursing program. Somehow, I went through them well. Hospital volunteer dpt provided me a very strong reference letter for me to get accepted to school. Nurses and CNAs appreciate me (except for 1 or 2 not-so-friendly ones) each time I go there to help. What kept me going? I wish I knew what it was, too. What I have been enjoying the most in hospital volunteering, is the contact I make with patients and make them feel comfortable. ** What began to scare/haunt me most is the medical errors caused by inexperienced newly grad nurses resulting from lack of training or from being pitched into the job right away...whatever reason it comes from...and then these newly grads are either forced to resign or get their license revoked. I'm not sure how long you've been in nursing but it seems like you are in a healthy working environment. I'm really happy for you. I'll try to find the answer to your question; what pulled me into nursing. :-) Thank you again.

I volunteer 3HRS per wk at a local hospital. As soon as I get home, I shower. Although I wear a gown, I don't like the smell of the hospital nor the smell of latex gloves that I put on. Although I don't do those complexed tasks like the CNAs and the RNs, I think showering as soon as I get home would be safer. Just like in my chemistry class, where we were told in the beginning, to make sure we wash our hands after we finish the lab, in order not to contaminate our belongings; I think it's a good idea to shower after nursing shift. My 2cents.

Thank you all of you, for such a quick response and most of all, for reminding me the positive side of the aspect in Nursing. Gosh, I feel like such a loser right now. I'm actually not worried about the years i'll be in nursing school, and in fact, I think it will be a lot of fun. It's the life after finishing the school that scares the crap out of me; especially when I read about newly grads quitting or getting canned from their 1st employment. Most of them appears to be the consequence of not enough time in training. To tell you the truth, I left a job in the past within 2months due to the same reason. They wanted a junior person and promised they will train me. (not nursing). The so-called "manager" was a classical office bully; at one point, I went to the washroom crying. Luckily, she helped me get my unemployment, but each time I read nurse bullying, I can totally relate to my previous experience. It's just that, in nursing, it seems like the entire hospital & HR are ready to gang up on you like some mafioso at anytime. As long as I find the correct niche, once I'm done with school, I am confident that I will do well; just the nurses who say they love their job. It would be my dream-come-true deal, since I naturally enjoy helping others and at times, going out of my way. I interact with patients at the hospital as a volunteer, and I can see how this can be the most rewarding job. On the otherside, I've seen some tough patients where nurses told me to stay away from them and call the nurse aids to look after instead. I'm definitely interested in the ER (I thrive in those environment), pediatrics, oncology, orthopedics, and med-surgical units. If I end up in a wrong area in Nursing, I can see myself packing and running towards the hospital emergency exit not looking back. (a bit exaggerated but I'd not hesitate to leave that job, if I see that I don't fit in.) Anyhow, I wish there's a fortune-teller with a crystal ball who can very honestly tell me which direction to go from now on.

Hi everyone, Can anyone feel free to comment on my thoughts below? Despite almost everyone around me discouraging me to go into Nursing, as we all know it is a very demanding profession, I still insisted and registered for pre-requisite courses a year ago. My grades were nearly 100; I also started volunteering at a local hospital to see how Nurses spend their days at their jobs. This spring, I got accepted to a local Nursing program, and I applied for loans & bursaries; registered for Fall courses. All there is left for me, is to start the semester. However, I discovered allnurses.com not too long ago, and I honestly wish I knew about this site last year. Now I clearly see how demanding this job is; Nurse bullying, getting physically & verbally attacked & abused by patients, MDs not appreciating you, colleagues back-stabbing, on top of long working hours and possible physical injuries (back problems, I hear), lack of support in the team, being set-up for a failure, risk of having your license revoked...etc. OMG, I have to admit that I truly admire current nurses out there. I'm almost on the point of just forgetting about this career, despite the fact that I've invested so much time & work to get into this program. Why? I'm 38 y.o. right now and if, after graduating from the school several years from now, I feel I cannot handle this job, I think I'd be really really depressed after all that investment I would have made. It seems like the nursing shortage is temporarily being resolved by the newly grads until they cannot handle their first new job anymore and then the hospitals go for another batch of newly grad nurses. Why else is there a nursing shortage?? Not only that, the hospital where I volunteer, I can clearly see that the nurses don't look happy at all. All of them look extremely stressed out. Some of them are very unfriendly that I prefer to avoid them. Can you imagine if I were to work with them? Thank god I'm only a volunteer. From what I've observed, the school life as a nursing student and actually nursing life once you get your license seems completely different, am I right? At school, you make friends and you build a good study group, etc. From what I've been reading here, forget about nursing friend or colleagues once you start working, since there seems to be an endless backstabbing and bullying in this field, given it's mostly women. Why did I choose nursing as my 2nd career? a. When I was in high school, MedSchool was my goal. Didn't make it. Long story. b. I've always been interested in health / science / doing researches. c. Each time I was well accomodated by healthcare professionals, I've always longed to be part of them, making difference in other people's lives. Now, I think I wasn't realizing how those healthcare professionals interact among themselves, versus how they interact wth patients. That's also different, right? d. Of course, I've been longing for a stable & mobile career; sth I can pursue for the rest of my life. This, also, may not the reality, since I've been hearing about how a lot of nurses get back injuries after long years in this field. Please feel free to honestly comment on my thoughts. Yes, I think I'm a really coward, at this point and a zero self-confidence....2 months before school starts.