CW1978

(I am the OP) I am so grateful for everything you have all posted here in reply. I know I needed to vent. When I vent to friends, coworkers, or family...I often feel guilty about my honest feelings. I don't feel judged by anyone but myself. FYI...some background on me: I work in a SNF, full time, swing shift, 6 months experience as an associates RN. I have a BA in Communication from '02, I'm 32 y/o (nursing is a career change for me) and I start my BSN next year. I thought I would be smart to tough it out 1 full year at this job so my resume looks good and this may make it easier to get a different job, like in a clinic or hospital, or....? I know I am LUCKY to have a job in this economy and region (Portland produces a LOT of nurses annually). My managers are kind, easy to talk to, and my paid time off is awesome (18 days a year paid). I know I have some good things going here. Knowing that I am not the only one who feels this way at times makes me feel a LOT BETTER. I'm always so excited to get my shift done and go home. This bugs me. I got into nursing to HELP people and share my love and compassion for life, not be desparate to get home every second.:sofahider This is how my shift is........ I get there at 2 pm, get report and create my brain for the first hour, then pass meds and do treatments for anywhere from 11-14 patients until 10:30pm. The WHOLE time I am racing against the clock to slam the meds and bust out the treatments and finish in time so I only have to stay an hour or two late (ie. til 11:30 or 12:30 usually) typing my prog notes/faxing docs/charting fluids/bla bla. If I am lucky, I have completed everything and not made any med errors! One thing I can say I do like about nursing...is that every shift brings something new, I am ALWAYS learning, and I move around a lot. I know I can switch to different areas, and I am now thinking of revisiting the OR (I did a rotation there in clinical but oddly, MISSED the pt contact!) Thank you all again for your thoughts. :bowingpur

Oh god...pleghm, vomit, anything from a trache is absilutely disgusting to me. Also I was changing the cartridge in a wound vac last night and it was DISGUSTING, I almost vomited in the pt room.

I got into nursing because I (naievely?) believed I would be helping people - and they'd apreciate it. Instead, as a CNA for 3 years in a SNF, hospital adult/teen/pediatric psyche, and acute level oncology unit...and now an RN in a SNF for 6 months I am haunted by the frequency of the thought, "I hate my patients." Could it be possible that I am jaded already? My patients are the whiniest bunch of rude, ungrateful, selfish, demented people I've ever met! They fake chest pain to get out of therapy (I overheard one laughing to another about how this is "the best way to get out of PT."), they keep home medications in their drawer and self-medicate without telling the nurses, they expect me to come at their beck and call, always have a smile on my face, and be sympathetic and compassionate 24/7! I often ask myself how I can feel this way towards people who cannot help the fact they have dementia or other cognitive issues which cause them to "finger paint" with their feces on the wall of their room, ask me the same question 10 times per hour, never say thank you or please, and always express distaste that I didn't make it to their room within 2 minutes of their request. Not to mention the fact that they do so much annoying sh*t like pouring their pills into their hand from the cup only to spill them on the floor and bedsheets, taking forever and a day to swallow one pill (again, if they can't help this why does it frustrate me so?), call me in to their room to tell me their toe hurts when they are admitted for pneumonia, CHF, or a hip fractrure. Is it wrong to be frustrated and angered by these people? Does that indicate that I am in the wrong field? Am I not the compassionate person I thought I was? I'm so frustrated because I have worked so hard to get where I am, but I feel like I should be 100% compassionate 100% of the time. IS that even possible? I had no idea how annoying patients could be, NO IDEA!

I live in Portland, OR and it is a great city for families, earthy people, tech-types, outdoor enthusiasts, gardeners, foodies, and music afficiondos! If you have a year of experience you may be eligible for many of the RN jobs here. I am a new grad and that makes it very hard for finding jobs, but with 1+ year of experience you may have a much easier go of it. As a new grad I am considering moving to Austin, Houston, DC, or even somewhere in NC for a job. Good luck and report back with your decision!

Our class pin was unveiled yesterday (we get pinned in 3 months). It is ugly IMO, and even the cheapest one costs $60. They even offer it in gold and white gold which costs $300! I have been working in healthcare for 3 years in several different facilities and have never seen an RN wearing a pin signifying their title or what school they went to. I'm not buying the $60 pin bc it will never be worn after pinning night, and frankly, I'm already struggling to pay for my program! I believe I can present myself professionally (i.e. well groomed, neatly dressed, and using professional speech and mannerisms, etc.) without having to wear a pin that states that I am an RN. I don't really think any of my sick patients will care where I went to school. Also, I attended a very well respected (locally), VERY difficult to get into - community college RN program..But I do not think people in general associate prestige or academic excellence with community colleges, so I don't really WANT to advertise to the world that I have a CC nursing education. I might feel differently when I complete my BSN program in a year or two.

Thanks for the post jljkhorton, I knew there were positive people out there like me :)

I agree, I think working at a Planned Parenthood would be great! I didn't realize it was hard to get into a place like this though.

You should definitely go for it! Your age will be a BONUS because you will have a little more life experiene than the 25 year olds in your class. You have plenty of life left in you to enjoy a wonderful career in nursing. Your GPA is good, and it is very competitive (at least in my region - the Pacific Northwest). And yes, perhaps the market is weird right now and there are a lot of hospital hiring freezes going on...but they are lifting and things will get better by the time you are out of school. And don't forget about all the aging baby boomers and all the soon to be RN retirees! That means a lot more patients and a lot more open nursing positions! Nursing is great and talk about JOB SECURITY. While all my college buddies were making it big in investment banking or financial advising, or sales or law, ...I was taking nursing pre-reqs...and now they are all out of a job and I am about to graduate and already have job offers! Have confidence in yourself. Stop doubting and start working towards that goal of becoming a nurse! Good luck!

I have worked as a CNA for two years in LTC and oncology and have, at times, been shocked at how little the nurses actually do (LTC). I remember on many occassions, a nurse sitting at the station across from a patients room, watching a patient call out for help, and not getting up to help, but instead calling an aide way down the hall who was very busy at work, to come help the patient! However, in my oncology job as a CNA, most of the nurses are young like me, and they say please and thank you for the most part. I appreciate it so much, it makes me feel respected and valued as a team member. There will always be a few nurses who take advantage of their seniority over the aides, and tell the aide to do all the unpleasant work so they dont have to, even if they are not busy and the aide IS busy. The way I see it, the patient is ALWAYS the priority, and if I can't stop what I am doing to respond to a nurses request, then I simply say I could help in about 10 or 15 minutes but right now I am with a patient. I would never simply refuse to help - after all that is WHY I am there! I make sure to take my breaks, and I don't overstretch myself to kiss up to the nurses. I have noticed though, that because I am very kind and willing to help everyone, that I almost always get the short end of the stick. But...it does me good too, because like I said, the nurses are polite and respectful to me. At the end of my long shift they thank me profusely and are always telling me how much they enjoy it when I am there. It makes it worth it a lot of the time :)

I have no delusions about the patients in the OR: I know they are my priority. I have an amazing way with patients bc they can tell I am genuine and compassionate, and they are treated by me as if they were my kin. I just happen to prefer caring for them while they are unconscious. And yes I know I will be interacting with them whem they are brought to the OR, and afterwards when they go to the PACU. Those small conscious interactions are just fine with me. Despite the oft egomaniac surgeons, I love working with a team, am very efficient, a great multitasker, and get on well with new people quickly. I have loved my limted OR experience in school, and would jump at the chance to go to the OR right out of school. That being said, I am still quite inexperienced as a nurse (I'm not graduating til Aug '10) and dont feel I have seen enough to really "know" what specialty is for me. I just "know" I preferred OR over Med-surg, OB, Oncology, LTC, and SNF. I can't say I'll never want to switch specialties, but as I always plan ahead and cover all my bases, I thought it wise to know what it might be like to change specialties later should I want to. I appreciate your feedbank, thanks

I'm going to finish nursing school in Aug 2010. At that time I'll be an RN with a BA, and about 1 year later I'll be an RN with a BA and a BSN. I will start work in Sept/Oct if hired right away and do school very part time (online mostly). I'm doing a clinical in the OR right now and really enjoying the fact that the patient is unconscious and unable to put on their call light for 2 more pieces of ice in their drink every five minutes At this point I want to head into OR nursing b/c I have enjoyed it more than med-surg and oncology which is where my main experiences have been as a CNA...but I worry that later as an RN if I want to change to a different area of nursing that I will not be very marketable to other areas of nursing (med-surg, ICU, trauma, oncology, etc.). Is it likely that I will have to take a pay cut at that time? Will I have trouble finding work b/c I don't have unit floor experience outside of school? Any feedback is greatly appreciated. I get so much valuable info from this site! Thanks in advance :)

(I think) I love that the patients are unconscious

I think you still alert the appropriate people even if the pt is DNR.