ekramona

In your situation I would seek the advice of a lawyer.

I doubt you would be fired, they probably just want to review email etiquette or something like that. Don't let it worry you. Good luck!

I've worked with really great teams and I've worked with dysfunctional teams. It is the people, not the shift, that sets the tone. Ive had the amazing experience to work with a group that always works together to get the job done, and has a great time doing so. Another group spends the majority of their energy trying to avoid tasks and consistently argues over what are and are not their responsibilities. I have worked with groups who teach one another and build eachother up, and I've worked with groups who back stab and set each other up to fail. These conflicting attitudes are all highly contagious - one or two strong people can influence the rest of the team. I find this phenomenon to be common throughout nursing. I have learned that the best strategy is to keep my focus on being a good nurse and a team player regardless of the group with whom I'm working.

I found it much easier to work nights when I was in my 20s. Nights and evenings are awesome because the pace is slower and, for the most part, you avoid having to respond to the demands of administration and the other disciplines - plus the differential doesn't hurt. As I got older however I found that my body didn't want to keep those hours anymore. The body really does prefer to sleep at night and be awake during the day. Working at night forces an unnatural lifestyle, and after a while that takes a toll on some of us. There are some ways to combat this though - I find that it helps to keep a regular routine of exercise and healthy eating, and also use of a light therapy box before heading to work makes it a little easier. I recently moved to the day shift and, even though the work is harder, I feel a lot healthier. I am also happier because I am less isolated from my family and friends. Some people manage to work nights for their whole career, but I just can't imagine doing that past my 20s or 30s.

There are a lot of options in nursing. If you don't like clinical work you can work in research, informatics, administration, public health... that being said though, it is probably difficult to get into those areas without any hands on professional experience. I happen to love the clinical side of nursing, and have found myself in situations where the only thing keeping me going is my love of what I am doing. If you decide to keep going you might find your niche in the profession eventually, but I bet you'll have a rough road until then. Good luck with everything, I hope you figure out what is best for you.

I just want to point out that I started this thread because I needed advice regarding the logistics of changing my name on my license. The initial post was not an invitation to criticize the actual practice of changing one's name after marriage. Perhaps it would have been more appropriate for some of the posted comments to have been saved for a thread that actually asks for your opinions!

I sat on a committee once for a very small undergraduate scholarship and it would have been very difficult for me to give feedback to anyone except those who actually won. First of all, the names were removed from the applications in order to reduce bias. If I remember correctly, I only ended up matching the names of the winners to their applications. Had anyone randomly contacted me after the selection process I probably wouldn't have been able to readily identify them and offer any feedback. Secondly, almost all of the applications were excellent. Those that won just stood out a little more. Other than offer the rubric we used to judge, I would be hard pressed to say what someone could do next time because it all depends on your competition. Finally, if someone had contacted me back then I would have been hesitant to answer because I doubt the policy of the organization I would have had to check with administration first. All that being said, go ahead and give it a shot! Every scholarship committee is different so perhaps they are in a better position to offer feedback. They might at least offer some insight into the rubric they used to judge the applications. You have nothing to lose by trying.

I just logged on recently after not being here for a while and I had no idea so many of you responded to this post. Thank you so much for your insight and encouragement. I am still caring for this patient and things have leveled out fairly well for all involved. I received criticism from my coworkers that I was "spoiling" him, but I kept my head down and continued to provide compassionate care for him. Eventually the CNAs got used to him, and stopped complaining as much. Although I tried my best to keep him comfortable, I found that it was not always practical to attend to his every request. One day I was very busy and he became angry with me that I wasn't helping him to his satisfaction. I stopped and had a conversation with him, explaining the perspective of the nurses and CNAs. I told him honestly that I wanted to help him as much as possible, but that I could not offer him a disproportionate amount of my time. He began to cry and admitted that he was very scared. He has learned to trust us and we have all learned to communicate with him. We alleviate his fears as much as possible by talking to him and reflecting our understanding of how he feels and what he needs. On days when we are working short or are very busy we let him know that and ask him to work with us by only asking for the most important things. He cooperates with us, trusting that when we have the time we will attend to his other needs as well. One thing I learned from this is that it is important to work with my CNAs. I didn't like their attitude and they didn't like my approach, but we both kept doing what we were doing and somehow met in the middle. If we had fought about it this would have turned into something much more difficult.

I've encountered nurses like that and I've found it works best to smile and be all business. It is tempting to respond to their games but it is usually best to keep it as brief as possible. If someone makes an inappropriate comment you can just look at them with a confused look, and then continue on with business. You do not have to say anything in response! When an unreasonable question is asked you can say "I am not sure that is relevant" or "perhaps that would be better directed toward the doctor" and then continue. If they are really insulting you or being abusive, you might want to involve the supervisor, although do so with caution because it could get worse depending on how effective a leader she/he is. If it is possible to isolate only the nurse who must take report and just deliver it one on one that would be best, but I know that some facilities make this difficult. Overall, keep it short and sweet and don't forget that you are just as much of a nurse as any of them, if not better. Have confidence in yourself! The only difference is that they are bullies and you are not!

I found it well worth the "hassle" to change my name in order to have this traditional expression of commitment to my new family and new life. It really wasn't a hassle at all as a matter of fact, I just filled out a few forms and waited on a few lines. I love my new name and was happy to do so. The only minor stumbling block was this one, which is why I posted on here asking for some advice. I hope this clears things up for you.

Thanks to all of you who gave helpful advice. I guess I will change it on my original license just to avoid any confusion. It doesn't seem necessary though since, as many of you pointed out, applications will always ask me for any other names I have gone by. My diplomas that I've earned before marriage will all still have my maiden name, and I am sure any job will accept these. I'll send in my parchment and have it changed anyway, just to avoid complications.

I am newly married and have taken my husband's last name. The NYS Office of the Professions offers me the option of having my new name reflected on my original license as well as the registration certificate that is sent to me with each renewal. They say I just need to send the original parchment and they will return it to me with the new name. I am wondering if this is something I should do or not. I'm not sure if there is some advantage or disadvantage to doing this. Will things be more complicated for me if my license shows a different last name than my registration certificate? Is there some reason I should keep my maiden name on record? Please share if you have gone through this and have some insight. Thanks!!!

I'm glad that you can all understand this experience. I try to be as caring as I can, but sometimes I get emotional. I have only been a nurse for a few years and over time I think it will get easier to have a balance. I just hope I don't get burned out and lose that sense of compassion.

Vespertinas, You make a very good point and I think you are right. Different staff members click with different patients and each of us is doing the job that God intends.

I think it is really rude of her to ask people to give her narcs without offering to do anything in return. In your position I might just say to her that I am just too busy, unless she can do a dressing or hang an IV for me. Regarding her other restrictions, it is probably best to not get involved unless it directly affects you. Your manager and HR are probably well aware of her restrictions and are handling the situation as they see fit. No reason to step in to that one unless you want life to become more difficult than it needs to be for yourself and everyone involved.