cinderella6251

Dear Stressed-out, I am stunned at all the blunted and mundane replies to this one! (Not that it's anyone's fault) Perhaps your colleagues here could use some of this advise: You know, hospitals and SNF's aren't the only places nurses work. How about a doctor's office? Or school nursing? Not as much money but TONS less stress! Try going to a nursing career fair and link up with other professionals...see what they do! Yes, you definitely need out of the institutional setting. With no kids, you have a tremendous advantage. In 2 years, you could get your NP and work in a practice! You say you have an associate? Why not go on for your BS.? Home health might be an option you may want to consider too. Considered getting a certificate in something? Like aesthetics? I was where you are about 15 years ago and now, I work as a forensic nurse in a county job where for the most part, I am pretty content and have a good retirement plan. I just got lucky and heard about the job from a friend. With all your experience, I think you can find better work you are more suited for. I wish you happiness and success in your search for greener pastures.

Dear nurse, Please accept this huge hug from me ((((((((()))))))))) as you read this. That patient will not be that last you will see die during your nursing career. We help patients live. We help them die. It sounds as if this patient with the liver mets already had a very serious prognosis. I mean, I'm not writing him off or anything. It's just the facts you stated speak for themselves. Would have been different if it were a 20 y/o s/p appy patient with a negative health history, right? Still, it is normal to have these thoughts after a patient dies. You are a nurse and you are human. I've been through this same thing with my patients. Find something fun to do when you are not at work. I know that sounds bad because you just lost a patient but as time goes on, you will find ways of coping with nursing grief. Also talk to your hospital chaplin or counselor or someone who can help you sort things out a bit. As long as you know you did your best within the scope of your training to help him and support the patient. Of course when you are a new nurse, you lack the confidence and experience but trust yourself and in the training and education you recieved! I'm sure you did an excellent job caring for this man. You sound very consciencious or you wouldn't have written to this message board. How lucky that man was to have a nurse like you who cared in his last hours! Hang in there, sweetie. I'm sorry you have such a lack of support by the staff on your unit! How sad to be working in oncology and not stick together and support eachother! Please feel free to email me any time. I am here to listen.

ARE you right???? Uh..HECK YAH!!!! I shudder to think if I were one of those patients getting those meds and suffered OD from too much med in my system. You were standing up for your patients and what is good for them and TRYING to protect them from this insane nurse whom I assume has forsaken patient safety in order make things easier on herself because she is burned out! You were right to address the issue and call it what it was: A BIG DEAL! I am an older nurse now and no longer work in a hospital but I do remember the pressure and demands placed on nurses and the bickering and lack of espirit de corps that goes on. I hope if I am ever hospitalized that you are my nurse. You sound like a good one.

Why did I become a nurse? Sorry for the novel but, you asked for it! LOL My story began in 1960 when I was born. I was so destined to be a nurse, I'm surprised that the doctors didn't just tatoo a cadeusus on my rear end. The doctors told my mother not to have any children because she was schizophrenic, had type 1 juvenile diabetes and was brittle. She talked my dad into having 2 children anyway: myself, and my brother. I was always the stronger of the 2 and was destined to become a caregiver from the moment my little brother came home from the hospital. Mom went into a crying jag that lasted weeks. Nowadays, they call that post-partum depression. My aunt told me years later. "And there you were... just 15 months old, stroking your mom's arm, trying to comfort her," my aunt said. There is a photo in our family album of me by my mother's side, looking up at her and patting her arm as she cried, holding my brother. Photos of my early "nursing days" dot the family album, like the one of me decked out in a nurse's uniform complete with white dress, blue cape, and winged nurse's cap. No doubt, many other nurses share the memory of playing nurse dress-up. At four years old, I became head nurse of my own 5 bed- "hospital ward", made from shoe boxes stuffed with doll pillows for mattresses. My father was an audiologist who worked in a busy practice with 4 ENT's and I used to go to work with him when he worked extra on Saturdays. It was there that I met my first nurse role-model who later became my cousin through marriage. Her name was Virginia. I stared intently at her as I watched her prepare allergy extracts for patients, drawing up serums into countless syringes; her glorious white starched cap with the black stripe stood regally on her head like a crown. She was pretty, had a kind smile and was always patient. She would give my brother and I allergy shots and even in those days with the thick needles, made the injections as painless as possible. Virginia wasn't the only influence in my life who inspired me to become a nurse. There was one much stronger and perhaps influenced me more on a subconscious level: my mother. At the age of 9yrs old, most kids came home to moms serving cookies and milk and asking "how was school today". My experience was often somewhat different. An all-too-familiar scene as I walked through the door in the afternoon was finding my mom passed out on the couch from an insulin reaction; barely coherent. This was always scary. It was my first taste of dealing with the very ill. Dad would tell us kids, "now if your mom has a reaction while I'm at work, give her orange juice." I was usually the one who would do this since I was older and ofcourse...destined for the nursing profession. When mom wasn't incapacitated by an insulin reaction, she was having nervous breakdowns. She went in several times for ECT and hospitalization which left me in charge: nurse and mom. Everyone said I was going to be a nurse. The Christmases between 1965, and 1970 brought me more than a half dozen Mattel nurse kits. Yes. It seemed this was my destiny, until I hit my teen years. 1974 ushered in my adolescence and an awareness of my codependency. At school, I found favor with the rebellious pot head crowd who all urged me to "run away." After one weekend of wildness, drinking tall boys and staying out all night, my father asked me what was wrong with me? I said I just didn't know. From junior high through my first year of college, I did my best to escape "my destiny" and the reality at home. I ran from it like the plague and immersed myself in the arts. During those years of denial, I became a fairly accomplished dancer, actress and artist. Then, my calling arrived. One night after going out dancing with some friends, one of my friends burned his hand on the stove while making us a late night snack. I did what I could to provide first aid for him and then rushed him to the hospital. A young nurse greeted us in admissions. She was about my age. She looked so professional and went about her duties with such confidence and self-assurance. Her name pin read: Soandso Soandso "RN." I remember sitting there for 6 hours with my friend in the emergency room, thinking, "I am going to be a nurse." The following fall, I enrolled at a community college to take my nursing prerequisites and 4 years later, graduated with my BSN and went on to take the NCLEX. That was 20 years ago. A few years ago, I went through my midlife crisis and started dancing again but I am still a nurse. It's not about the money. It's about the patients and what I do for them. Author Peggy Anderson who wrote one of my favorite books said, "Sometimes I help patients live. Sometimes I help them die. Always I help them. I'm a nurse." At 46, I have made peace with codependency. It has been my friend for many years. As I get older, I care less about buzz words and silly catch phrases. I always think of the people whose lives were made better by what I did for them and it fills an empty void. I look back over my life and do not regret becoming a nurse. I am grateful for my parents and everyone who helped shape my destiny.