Nurses who married a nurse?

Published

How do you make your schedules work? I am graduating soon and I've already accepted a job. I can be on either days or nights; my husband is on days. We have two kids, and we are trying to figure things out with childcare and family time. Does anyone have any experiences or advice for this type of situation?

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

My husband and I are both nurses. We tried to have the same weekends and holidays off -- and that meant volunteering to work Christmas because my husband was working Christmas, or trading for someone else's Thanksgiving or New Year's. There were quite a few "kid exchanges" in the breakroom of either his unit or mine when one of us was working days and the other nights. The night person had the responsibility to get the child to school or to the babysitter, go home and sleep and then pick her up later. As long as one of us was home at night, we didn't have to pay for pricy overnight childcare. The day person handled the phone calls from the school (or delegated them to an "Aunt" or "Grandparent" if that was appropriate.) The teachers thought we had an enormous extended family. We had friends, mostly nurses, for whom we would handle similar issues if they were working. Of course if you have real family in the area, that would be awesome! Having one day person and one night person sure cut down on the childcare costs.

My wife and I were on opposite shifts when we first got married and that was a very hard way to start out. It was like we only saw each other in passing . And spending off days together when one of you works nights is hard to do as well. Ruby Vee sounds like she had a good experience with it so maybe it can work well if done right, especially if you've been together for a while. The only thing I could tell you for sure is starting your life together as the both of you start your nursing careers on opposite shifts is not a recipe for intimacy. We switched to the same shift within 3 months and instantly had way more time together...and less grouchy, sleep deprived arguments

What works well for our family is for me to be per diem and my husband to work full time. I typically work 1-2 days a week, but could easily work full time or even overtime if I wanted to. He carries the benefits and I have total control of my schedule. One of us is always off to watch the baby and it's easy to coordinate holidays and vacation time.

My husband is not actually a nurse, but he works a similar schedule.

Does your hospital allow for you to work weekends only?

I have some nurse friends who do this and their significant other (also nurse) works the weekday shifts. Depends on the hospital of course, but this one in particular allows it because so many nurses have kids and want to work the weekends when their significant other is home to watch them. Childcare is so expensive! The younger, single nurses want the weekends off so they take up the weekday shifts...the trade off is great for all involved.

My best friend does this and she is home during the week with the babies but still gets a few full days with her hubby nurse (his off day). She is gone on the weekends but he is off and has lots of his own time with babies.

+ Join the Discussion