'Be Tender'

Nurses Humor

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I had received an order to anchor a foley on an elderly man who was retaining urine. I explained the procedure to him, telling him that a male nurse was available if he felt uncomfortable with a woman doing it. He declined the offer and began telling a story of Adam and Eve, which involved a rib and birth, after which he said 'so you see why I can't have a man do it'. I told him I understood and proceeded with preparations, during which time he began talking. He told me how his wife had been dead 30 years and they always had a good sex life :uhoh3:. Then he started talking about how he never had visited Las Vegas, but 'what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas':lol2: (I am assuming he was talking about legalized prostitution?). Then he says..... ' be tender'....:rotfl:. I about lost it at that point. Unfortunately, the catheter insertion attempt was short-lived.... he had a severe urinary meatus stricture and the 14Fr catheter could only be passed a quarter of an inch. I high-tailed it out of there and laughed to myself as I notified his female MD. I've never had a patient equate a catheter insertion with SEX before.

I've never had a patient equate a catheter insertion with SEX before.
I did once... middle-aged guy who while I was inserting the cath yells "OW OW OW... OH MY GOD IT HURTS!!!" over and over. Then he orgasmed.

:stone

Very few things get me rattled. But that did set me back on my heels a bit...

Specializes in Travel Nursing, ICU, tele, etc.
I did once... middle-aged guy who while I was inserting the cath yells "OW OW OW... OH MY GOD IT HURTS!!!" over and over. Then he orgasmed.

:stone

Very few things get me rattled. But that did set me back on my heels a bit...

OH MY GOD!!! :lol_hitti:eek::eek::eek: how is that even possible??

OH MY GOD!!! :lol_hitti:eek::eek::eek: how is that even possible??

emmanuel's pt reminds me of a bumper sticker i once saw:

"sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me."

you know dee, one of THOSE type of pts. ;)

leslie

Specializes in Travel Nursing, ICU, tele, etc.
emmanuel's pt reminds me of a bumper sticker i once saw:

"sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me."

you know dee, one of THOSE type of pts. ;)

leslie

Hehehe,

Live and learn, I guess!!! :lol2::lol2::lol2::lol2:

I did once... middle-aged guy who while I was inserting the cath yells "OW OW OW... OH MY GOD IT HURTS!!!" over and over. Then he orgasmed.

:stone

Very few things get me rattled. But that did set me back on my heels a bit...

OMG Emmanuel!! I do not even know what I might do in that situation....I mean, what do you say?? Oh I laughed so hard when I read your post I cried!! I'm sooo sorry this happened to you!

emmanuel's pt reminds me of a bumper sticker i once saw:

"sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me."

you know dee, one of THOSE type of pts. ;)

leslie

:lol2:

'xactly

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