At a loss for the future!

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I lost my job in December 2013 due to failing a drug test, I reported myself to the Louisiana State Board of Nursing, and signed the confidential RNP agreement. In Jan 2014, I went to an inpatient rehab facility for a 90 day program, only to have to leave 2 days later because my insurance company decided they wouldn't pay for inpatient treatment. I have no wealthy family members etc to ask for the money to pay for treatment (not that I really want to ask someone for that much money anyway). I went 6 months without a job, but have been at my current job (a receptionist) for a year. I have been clean 1 ½ years, but I have no idea what I can do with my future. The board keeps telling me I have to go to inpatient, or spend $3000 on a 3 day evaluation and hope that they recommend outpatient treatment, but nothing is for sure.

I am totally at a loss of what to do – I love nursing, I know I screwed up – and I totally own that; however, I hate that I am still putting my family through so much by making so much less money, and working just as many, if not more hours than I was when I was working in the hospital.

I have just about decided that I need to go back to school and get another degree and pursue another line of work, but I just don't know what I would do, nor do I want to add that much more debt to my family right now. Is there anything that anyone can suggest (ways to deal with the state board, other jobs that I could look into that may utilize my degree, but not require an active license, another field of study that I could get into that would go hand in hand with my BSN? Any help is greatly appreciated.

My husband and kids deserve so much more than I have been able to bring to the family lately, and it is wearing on all of us… living pay check to paycheck, saying a prayer every time I have to go to the grocery store etc…

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Hiya! First, congratulations on your sobriety, under so much acute pressure it is hard! I am almost at 1 1/2 years and am excited!

When I first got into recovery I got a low key job, and then got real because with supporting myself, student loans , treatment...oi vey it adds up fast. I started looking at craigslist. Specifically under "non profit", and focused my attention on jobs that desired a "human services degree or related field". Nursing is within the related field category. I landed an amazing job, by all means- it doesn't pay as much as nursing- but I get the opportunity to interact with the municipal clinic (eek nurses!), state government (double eek!), and dozens of community based health centers (which may be beneficial when I go nursing job hunting at some point). And it pays the bills. It is amazing! So here are some ideas for you:

-state epidemiology (the blood borne illness surveillance coordinators -quite a few of them- do not hold health degrees. And their work sent them to phlebotomy school to certify them.

-community mental health case management in non profits

-I work at a company that specializes in HIV care, and I do the testing and education

-look into jobs that emphasis "harm reduction" as their model (they will be more forgiving of your past/ it is an asset)

think of any job that requires a degree in Public Health (my state doesn't require a license for this work).

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Sorry you are having such difficulty- the requirement for inpatient treatment is robbery when you are not using- but they know you are in a hard place and will recommend it if they are affiliated with the treatment program. I went to a board approved evaluator that did not offer inpatient treatment for this reason.

You have to weight the enormous cost of all of this against the possibility of getting a job- I was lucky and was able to complete the work requirement of my program. When I completed that I left my position and started another career.

Today- 4 years after getting caught I am so much happier and healthier I cannot believe it- keep moving forward and you will get there too! Just do the best you can for today and try to improve tomorrow.

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Specializes in ER, TRAUMA, MED-SURG.

Hey Twin! I'm so sorry! I'm also from Louisiana. I was caught diverting at work in August 1999 and entered our state's RNP.

I had been working at the facility where I had been caught for 5 months and they fired me after I was caught.

So I lost my insurance when I was fired - had to wait a month at home for a bed. Like u, I didn't have a wealthy family member I could I could go to. I finally ended up at a 28 day inpt stay at the state facility in the "central" part of the state.

I had such a difficult time finding a facility that would give me a chance - seemed like once they heard "diversion" they wanted no more to do with me. Thankfully, I did find someone to give me a chance when another nurse from our support meeting was able to help me get my foot in the door.

Holler if I can do anything - I'll be thinking of u and hope things work out soon. Hugs!

Anne, RNC

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Specializes in critical care, ER,ICU, CVSURG, CCU.

keep your head up, your sobriety foremost, and continue to do the next right things, lotta networking potential in 12step meetings, especially if you can find a cadeuses meeting, love and support to you ;)

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Thank you so much for all of your wonderful hints and clues! I greatly appreciate all of it, more than I can ever express -- it has been the hardest battle of my life, but I keep trying to tell myself that my higher power MUST have something major in the works for me, there is someone, some where who needs my help, and I just have to find that person. It really it great to know that there are so many out there who have been through this crazy roller coaster ride!!! Hope you all have a great week!! ~~ TwinMommy2403

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Hey Twin! I'm so sorry! I'm also from Louisiana. I was caught diverting at work in August 1999 and entered our state's RNP.

I had been working at the facility where I had been caught for 5 months and they fired me after I was caught.

So I lost my insurance when I was fired - had to wait a month at home for a bed. Like u, I didn't have a wealthy family member I could I could go to. I finally ended up at a 28 day inpt stay at the state facility in the "central" part of the state.

I had such a difficult time finding a facility that would give me a chance - seemed like once they heard "diversion" they wanted no more to do with me. Thankfully, I did find someone to give me a chance when another nurse from our support meeting was able to help me get my foot in the door.

Holler if I can do anything - I'll be thinking of u and hope things work out soon. Hugs!

Anne, RNC

Anne -- thank you! I have been told that I have an incredible resume - both in and out of the medical field, but I got turned down for over 40 jobs last year because I felt it was necessary to be honest about being in recovery at some point in the interview/hiring process... so this time I kept it to myself until I was hired and past my probation period -- which KILLED me, its still not something many people at my current job know about, and I am glad because I can only imagine the criticism I would get if they did... about 2 months ago, I was getting something out for one of the techs, and a bottle of narcotics broke.. I immediately took it to the dr and the techs (not to mention there are at least 5 cameras in that general area).... was told it was no big deal etc etc... come back to work the following Tuesday and have to take a "random" drug test... but no one else that was there when it happened had to take drug test... I have worked very hard to get myself out of the awful situation I put myself in, and I take great pride in my work, and I felt very insulted to be made to do a "random" drug test when there were at least 4 people there when it happened.. Oh well, it is what it is, and the test was negative, of course, so my manager got to "choke" that one down -- I think she figured it would be positive and she could fire me... sorry for the rambling, just getting home and getting kids settled and realizing how much I crave structure, routine etc... and so do my kids, and I have absolutely none of that now, except being off on Sundays... literally, my time of work changes daily, what days I work changes weekly etc... its so awful :( I am guessing that you are probably close to me -- I am in the Shreveport/Bossier/Benton area -- I do have to say one more thing, this awful disease has definitely allowed me the opportunity to be a fellow nurse addicts "initial contact" person when they realize they have a problem -- which has been an incredible blessing - enough rambling, I am sorry! Hope you have a great day!! -- Sarah

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Hiya! First, congratulations on your sobriety, under so much acute pressure it is hard! I am almost at 1 1/2 years and am excited!

When I first got into recovery I got a low key job, and then got real because with supporting myself, student loans , treatment...oi vey it adds up fast. I started looking at craigslist. Specifically under "non profit", and focused my attention on jobs that desired a "human services degree or related field". Nursing is within the related field category. I landed an amazing job, by all means- it doesn't pay as much as nursing- but I get the opportunity to interact with the municipal clinic (eek nurses!), state government (double eek!), and dozens of community based health centers (which may be beneficial when I go nursing job hunting at some point). And it pays the bills. It is amazing! So here are some ideas for you:

-state epidemiology (the blood borne illness surveillance coordinators -quite a few of them- do not hold health degrees. And their work sent them to phlebotomy school to certify them.

-community mental health case management in non profits

-I work at a company that specializes in HIV care, and I do the testing and education

-look into jobs that emphasis "harm reduction" as their model (they will be more forgiving of your past/ it is an asset)

think of any job that requires a degree in Public Health (my state doesn't require a license for this work).

Twoyearnurse -- thank you so much, I will definitely be looking into this ASAP!! Your suggestions & story give me such hope!! Congrats on your almost 1 1/2 years!!!

Sarah, BSN, former RN...

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Specializes in ER, TRAUMA, MED-SURG.

Hi Sarah!

Hahaha! I had one of those experiences too - this was actually after I finished my RNP contract and I was working on an LTAC unit that was located on 2 floors - on 6th was vents, trachs, medically complex and 7th was more post op knees and hips.

Anyway, I was pulled to 7th and help restart an IV. The nurse that was assigned to the pt I stuck bought me a coke and we visited a few minutes before I went downstairs. Well, I had 2 meds that I had to take AC and I was going down to the cafeteria to pick it up.

God forbid "Angel" saw me pull 2 pills out of my med bag and take them when I was headed down to the cafeteria.

I don't think the stair door had even CLOSED and that clerk had our manager's extension on "speed dial" and Angel scampered right up the stairs that she heard me say I was going to take my new meds before I ate.

So I go to the cafeteria and back to my usual place on the 6th floor. One of our managers was already in the nsg station waiting on me. She had a CRAZY smile on her face - "oh Miss Anne! So glad to find u! U have been selected to provide a RDS today. (Now, this was almost 1pm - the "ransoms" are done early - by 9am or so. My fellow nurse that I was working with that week pulled me aside and gave me the whole story. He had heard the WC call to "telling on "me for taking drugs.

I tried to blow it off but the other CN kept saying" u KNOW they do ransoms early in the am! Someone's scre$ing with u!"

DS results came back clean as a whistle, as I knew they would.

Turns out the scene didn't turn out as bad as it could have - the ward clerk got a few "days off no pay". She decided she didn't want to play well with others and "no showed" the next day. Decided that that LTAC wasn't "her place".

Sorry for the verbal diarrhea! We are about an hour or so from u guys it seems - West Monroe - I drive your way at times - maybe we could do lunch or something!

Hugs! Don't work too hard!

Anne, RNC

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