Worried

Hello, this is my first time to post. I have been a nurse since 1970, have always worked full time or part time. I and my husband have raised three great kids, and because of his job, have moved a lot through the U.S. We have lived in our current location about 4 years.

Last spring I had a headache for a month, it would go away with regular strength tylenol. I went to my GP and he said come back in a week if it was not better. Two days later I was a work, and began to walk unsteady in the halls. My nurse manager cracked a wheelchair behind my knees and said I was to go to the ER. In ER they drew blood, did an EKG and a head CT. They called my husband and he was in the room with me, when the ER doctor came in and said "No wonder you had a headace, you have a brain tumor." That was nine months ago. I had a biopsy, radiatition therepy and chemo. I was told Oct 1st, that I am in remission. I am supposed to go back to work after the first of the year, but this is why I am worried. I cannot seem to get in third gear. I go to the gym and seem quite strong. I can lift and do anything I want around the house. Mentally I think I am OK. It is just I hit a wall, and really no reason for me to continue on with any activity. I just stop. Well I can't do that at work. How do you prepare for a 12 hour night shift, in ICU? I also know my co-workers, and wouldn't be surprised to find myself with a "hard" patient and the admission because I have been "on vacation".

I think I am just using up energy worrying about things that may or may not happen (isn't that what worry is). How do I get ready for this, or can I?

Thanks for any advice you may share.