worried i may need help

i am a nurse as of a year (lpn)... i have been hospitalized for bipolar disorder (even a psych dr i work for told me im prob "bipolar-ish".... the main bipolar drugs that work for me are antiseizure drugs...trileptal and lamictal...the geodon, depakote, lithium, etc were just too much for me... i don't fit ALL the bipolar stuff...up for days...but i def have manic traits. im acutally a psych nurse cause im so interested. im worried about myself right now...ive gone to my regular doc for med changes/increases...anyone out there that can relate? im worried about myself, my license, my career...im not an extreme case at all but when i feel bad i feel BAD.. also i find many in my psych field are in it cause of either personal or family history...

You might want to consider an evaluation by a psychiatrist to determine an accurate diagnosis and appropriate treatment. Many PCP's are excellent, but I'm not sure all PCP's are best for treating some of the more challenging cases they see. If you're concerned about yourself and your career/license then I would seek the best possible care available. Just as with recovery from chemical dpendence, I'm a firm believer that those who do the best put their best effort into achieving and maintaining "recovery". I see recovery as trying to walk up a a down escalator. In the very beginning it takes a great deal of effort to achieve the level of recovery we desire. Once we're their, it takes continued effort to maintain that level. As soon as we take a "vacation" from our recovery efforts, we immediately begin heading toward the bottom again. Sometimes it's fast, sometimes slow. Unless we continue to work a program, we find ourselves returning to old habits and sliding back into those dark places.

There is a program called Wellness Recovery Action Plan that has been produced by Mary Ellen Copeland. She is recovering from Bipolar Disorder as well. I use it with clients who have a wide variety of (or multiple) diagnoses, including chemical dependence. Excellent program.

Good luck and let us know how you're doing!

Jack

I would find better help if this doctor is saying you're "bipolar-ish". Sometimes the psychiatrist you're seeing isn't the right one.. if you don't feel comfortable or if they're misinformed or just plain stupid, keep looking. It took me 9 psych's to find the right one but it changed my life. Hang in there, just get the help you need. You need to find the right balance of medication and counseling- and it WILL happen!