what step to do next

[johncucac]

Hello guys,

Long time lurker here. Please bare with me. Its a bit long to read. I have my BSN and has been working at a rehab place for 1 year. Technically, I'm not consider 1 year after nursing school, but it sure feels like it. I manage to get a job at a hospital near me. 2 months in while still on orientation, my mom fell and broke her left arm. It's only my mom and myself at home, so I had to write a resignation letter that I have to quit. I also told them the reason why. The director of nursing was pretty nice about it. She told me she would keep my name in the system and that I can follow up with her in a few months if my mom gets better.

Well my mom still wasn't doing very well after 1 month so I decided to call her to tell her what is happening. She told me that she would keep my name in the system just in case my mom gets better and that I will go back. However, I would need to turn in my badge and nursing tracker. Between that time I manage to try to work something out with my aunt and sister-in law so they could help take care of my mom.

Since it was only my mom and I, I had to take off work to take care of her. I manage to use the money that I saved over those 6 months to be off of work for nearly 2 months. Well the funds ran out, and now I have to work again. I was trying to plan it with my aunt and sister in law to help take care of my mom. They agree to do so. I went back to the hospital to talk to the director of nursing last week. She told me she never took my name off of the hospital because she wanted to see if my mom would get better. I told her that I'm trying my best to work the schedule out with my aunt and sister-in law so that I could go back to work and not be stress out over work and wondering who will be taking care of my mom. I told her I want to return but is not sure. I just want everything to be fine before returning.

The director of nursing told me that it was fine. She will try to work something out with me. I was about to turn in the tracker, but she told me that I can keep the tracker until I'm ready to get back (I'm afraid that I might lose it, its pretty expensive).

After a week I found out that my mom has cervical cancer. My aunt only can stay two days out of the week for a few hours because she has to get back to her husband as well. So now I can't come back to the hospital because there is no one to take care of my mom. I have to try to find a prn job now (at a less stressful place).

I'm just worried that the hospital will make me pay some money because I was still on the system, and that they have to find other workers to work my shift or pay them overtime to work my shift. I was still in orientation when I resign. I also didn't have a contract with the hospital. It was written on the paper that I sign that it was at will and I or the hospital could leave anytime without a reason. I just wanted to be honest and told them the reason why I had to resign.

Sorry guys, I'm just too worried now. All these hospital bills and stuff are coming in. Compounded with the need to find a job. I would go back to the hospital, but I think it will just be too stressful and that I don't have anyone to take care of my mom. If I make any mistakes on grammar please forgive me. I have been up all night stressed out.

[NotReady4PrimeTime, RN]

I'm sorry to hear you're in this situation but I'm really unsure what you're asking. Are you looking for approval that you quit your job to care for your mother when she broke her arm (although I'm confused as to why that would be necessary unless there are other factors related to her abilities that you haven't revealed)? Are you looking for advice on how to make sure you're not liable for any financial obligation to your former employer? Or are you looking for advice on what to do about being unemployed and continuing to care for your mother?

I'm very confused - did you resign from your job or did you take a leave of absence? If you resigned, you should have returned your badge and any other property belonging to your employer (such as the nurse tracker) on your last day of work. If you're on a leave of absence, then you would have kept hold of both. If you're on a leave of absence the hospital would have to fill your shifts with someone else but that could not be made your responsibility. If you resigned it's definitely not your problem. You say you didn't have a contract, just an at-will acceptance of employment. I would say you have no ties to that employer and therefore have no worries regarding them "coming after you".

My guess it that this situation is mainly a cultural one. Many people with broken arms are able to care for themselves while the other residents of their home work. Many people with cervical cancer do the same. Is this the case for you?

[johncucac]

Yes I meant to ask if I'm liable for any financial obligations. I did resign and the DON was aware of it. She wanted to keep my name in the system to see if I want to return if my mom got better. This hospital is always needing nurses so that is probably why. I initially tried to work out a schedule with my sister-in law and aunt so I could have a set schedule to work. However, I don't think that is going to work out now as my aunt has to take care of her husband whom has heart problems and a pacemaker so she couldn't stay a whole day with my mom. My sister is a dental hygienist and some days she has to come in or get call off according to the amount of patients coming that day. I went to turn my badge in and tracker, but the DON was happy that I thought about coming back and setting up a schedule to make it work. I told her I just want to turn it in like she said and incase another nurse needs it. She told me that I could keep it until I came back as they have new ones already. Before we left she ask me what I want to say to the staff. I told her to tell them that I'm trying my best to work things out so I could come back as some of the staff was concern about me. She went ahead and wrote down "returning." I'm not the type of person that likes to challenge authority. I don't think I made it clear that I'm not sure I'm coming back. I just don't want to give false hope to her or be liable because my name is still in the system. I resign while still in orientation and the agreement is at will.

I told her I have to work things out with my family members first to take care of my mom. Now with the new diagnose of cervical cancer it has gotten worse. I hope it is not too late. You are right it is a cultural thing. I'm Asian by the way. My mom health has just decline so quick. Just a few months ago she was fine and walking with no problems. Now she has gotten progressively worse.

[NICU Guy, BSN, RN]

I understand that it is a cultural thing, but you need income to pay your bills. There has to be someone to help with her care while you work if getting her home health is not an option.

[NotReady4PrimeTime, RN]

Let's get one thing straight. You resigned. You are not "in the system" as an employee and you owe nothing to that employer. The DON is making it so that if you decide you CAN go back that there would be no hold-up in rehiring you. That's all she's done. I'm sure she totally understands that you don't know when or IF you'll be coming back. But you really need to go in and hand in that locator. Get rid of it.

I hope you're able to sort all of this out, and that your mother recovers quickly and completely. But I agree with Don. You have to figure out how you're going to support the two of you and do it soon. You either find a job that lets you work nights, and be with your mom during the day or you find a caregiver who will stay with your mom so you can work when you have to.