meloo1969

I haven't heard a word from the investigator so I'm thinking maybe they just dropped it? I'm still waiting on the BON for their disciplinary action. how are things going for you?

still waiting to hear back from the investigator.....hopefully the longer it takes , the better the news? I'm having crazy thoughts that every time the dogs bark it may be the police coming to arrest me! the board is doing an investigation with the hospital now so just waiting for that. thx for asking !

no not working and the special investigator was from the local police dept

what happened with your situation? did they prosecute you or just drop the charges? the investigator mentioned the hospital's "cost of the medications". will this be forever on my record as well? I've had more than a couple nurse friends who have been in this situation but were never reported to the police!??

OMG, I just received a call from a special agent investigating my case! apparently the hospital reported me! I told him to contact my lawyer. I'm so scared!! has this happened to anyone else???

thank you! I will keep you posted. I'm going to get started with some online cadeuceous classes...if anyone knows a good one let me know ;-)

yes, it will always be shown on my license. Because I was turned into the BON, it will be on that site and nationwide data base as well. I am still waiting to hear the discipline....probably three years monitoring and all that goes along with that I'm assuming.

that is nice to have the availability of outside monitoring in other states. I have a friend in Minnesota who does monitoring through an independent program. there is no such thing here in my state. the only monitoring program for nurses in through the BON. and the complaint is already filed in the system and will forever be a part of my record unfortunately. All states are different, but the one I live in happens to have a punitive BON and no other options.

good point, and yes, the serenity prayer! need to go meditate on that right now! thank u ♥

wow, so well said ! thank you for taking the time and effort to not only respond, but thoughtfully and with great wisdom! What great advice and so nice to hear it from those who have been in similar circumstances. I am now feeling like I do want to go through with this process. In my mind it would have been an easy way out just to simply give up my license, but the bigger picture has me and my recovery in it, not just my nursing license. I have dealt with addiction issues for many years but have always been a "very functioning addict" and high achiever and have always taken the best care of my patients possible....have never slighted my patients ever. So, in my head, that was justification. But I am tired of waking up in the night with panic attacks because of the guilt and shame. I'm tired of hiding. I want to get better and I'm tired of the roller coaster of drugs and alcohol to numb my emotions. i've been clean for almost three weeks now and feeling better despite the anxiety of what I am facing. My husband is aware of it all and has been a great source of strength and support, altho I must admit he was probably an enabler. my biggest fear still is having my name come out on the BON website as this is a small town, and after 20 years of nursing and working in two hospitals, I know most of the nurses and much of the community knows me as well. i worry about this incident defining me and my 20 years of being a great nurse. Just like Tom Brady now is known for deflate gate , despite being an amazing quarter back. I have been doing meditation and reading scripture and doing a lot of praying which helps , but still the fear is overwhelming at times. and like you said , SORORSKS, it is very tough not to allow the emotions and fear to take over! I have been proactive, but to the point of obsession...because that is what I do (part of my addictive personality I assume). My husband keeps telling me to take a break from it all and do some other things. I have to look to the future and believe that this will not define me and I will get through it a better person. I do believe God has a bigger plan and this was to be. thank you again for your thoughtful responses! ♥

I was also turned into the DEA....do they always do this/???

ok, good to know, thank you for your response! any advice on whether to retain an attorney? if I retain an attorney does that mean I am fighting their accusation? i do not want a hearing and I do not want to spend tons of money on this!

one other question for anyone who may know....If I hire an attorney, does that automatically mean to the BON that I am "fighting the accusations" or can I still cooperate and agree to their terms but have an attorney represent me in this?

wow , I thought 3 years was the maximum?! five years seems like quite an awful sentence! this is my first offense so hoping not more than three years? we have tickets to go to Hawaii in mid January.....I hope this process doesn't affect that because we've spent a lot of money to go on this vacation! thank you all for your great advice, so appreciated!!

the only monitoring program where I live is through the BON, so there will always be the disciplinary action on it. they have suspended my license for now