"I'm a really hard stick...no one ever gets it" (Wish I got a dollar for every time I heard that) "I've never seen it so busy here" (Really?! This is the busiest you've seen it? How often are you here???) "I don't want an IV..." (Then WHY are you here??) "How long is this whole thing going to take??" (This is usually the first question they ask before I even start an assessment on them) "Am I going to be admitted?" (Asked immediately after I take blood...how the HECK would I know this yet?) "I need pain meds" (Within first minute of sitting on the bed...you KNOW the drill, you KNOW the doctor needs to see you first) ...and of course my favorite "Last time I was here they gave me that pain med that starts with a D...Di...Dil...something like that, it really works well" (Am I surprised? No.)