Peppercorn_Kat

"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body - but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand, strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, 'Woo hoo - what a ride!'" "We, the unwilling, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much, for so long, with so little, we are now qualified to do anything with nothing." - Mother Teresa

"Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes." "There are plenty of fish in the sea. Unfortunately I am a turtle." "Someday your prince will come. Mine got lost took a wrong turn and is too stubborn to ask for directions." "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice." "Those who discourage your dreams have probably abandoned their own."

I work in a low-care aged care facility (which I think is the Australian equivalent of Assisted living). I'm a personal care assistant, which is probably the same as a CNA. My first death experience happened at the start of my shift. It was about 6.30am, I went into a resident's room to help her get ready for breakfast and found her on the floor. Not breathing, no pulse, very cold and stiff. A part of me knew she was dead, but I kept calling her name, half-expecting her to wake up. :stone Then I went and got one of my co-workers, and she was great and seemed to know exactly what to do, and was sensitive to the fact that this was my first death. For the rest of the shift I had to be bright and cheerful for the sake of the other residents, but driving home from work that afternoon I think it finally sunk in. I think it was hard, because it wasn't a 'good' death. She didn't look peaceful. I don't know how she got out of bed, or why. She must have passed away sometime between the time night shift last checked on her, and when I came in. On the other hand, she was DNR, and was very old and frail and had been wanting to die for a long time, despite everyone's best efforts to keep her motivated and involved in the activities at the facility. When I got home, I lit a candle in memory of that resident and just sat and remembered her for a while. I think that really helped, it gave me a chance to say good bye. I now do this whenever one of our residents passes away.

I would definitely recommend Living, Dying, Caring: Life and Death in a Nursing Home by Alan Pearon, Roasalie Hudson and Jennifer Richmond. Although it focusses on Nursing home care, rather than Hospice work, I think its a great book for anyone who is planning to work in end of life care. The book is a collection of true stories about a nursing home in Australia, and after each story there is a reflection on what aspects of the patient's care were handled well, what could of been done better and how. It focusses a lot on how to provide effective palliative care. Although it's not a textbook or anything, I still learnt a lot from it. :)