Well I am not a brand new nurse but feel like one. I started out of nursing school working nights at a behavioral health hospital. Mostly all we did was do chart checks, give the occasional or sometimes more than occasional prn meds during the night, and pass 0700 meds. Working nights was taking a toll on my health and when we moved to another state I decided to start working days! I still don't understand why night shift gets a shift differential because you are running your bottom off during the day. So I have been working 4 1/2 months on days in behavioral health with 4 weeks of orientation which makes me feel like a new nurse because it is totally different. The first part of Oct, I gave a pt too much of an emergent med where the pt got 4 times the amount of Ativan and Cogentin. I caught the error myself, because the supervisor wanted to know why the patient was so drowsy and asked how much Ativan I gave. I originally said 2 mg and she said that needs to be corrected because the patient is less than 5' and weighed about 79#. So I started looking at the order and remembered exactly what I gave her and realized I gave way too much. I told my supervisor right away and called the MD. I was so embarrassed and felt so inept as a nurse that I immediately told my supervisor to report me to the BON. We had the patient sent to the hospital next door as a precaution and I tried to continue working on the unit. I was so rattled that I was having a hard time working and the supervisor asked if I wanted to just finish the charting on this patient and I said yes. I didn't even get that far when they had me get a drug test and told me that I was suspended from my job pending investigation. The patient's VS were well within normal and she was okay albeit sedated. Of course, I went over everything that happened and remember just drawing up the meds on auto pilot because I had another patient that had started throwing chairs and my mind was preoccupied. I also had been stressed out because I had been written up for not scanning medications correctly into the system and not giving patients on another unit emergent meds in time before we had to call a code. I had PTO approved for vacation the following week and since I was suspended I didn't get paid. By the end of my vacation, I was called and asked to come in and meet with my supervisor. I suspected I was going to get fired and I was, but I feel so inept that I am even questioning my nursing ability. I have never worked in anything other than behavioral health and do not feel adequate enough to apply for a hospital job. I am looking into home health but have read the postings and see that there are trachs, IV, blood draws and the like. I have no experience in those except for clinicals in nursing school which was 3 yrs ago. Not sure where to go from here. Any advice? I feel awful and afraid to give anyone an injection now!