banannabag

I Am a BSN RN for 20 years with certifications in critical care and med-surg I make 33$ base salary and 8 dollars differential to float to EVERY unit (about 40) in a level 1 trauma hospital with magnet status in PA. I made $95,000 last year with about 8 hours/month OT average I like my job because I have gained much knowledge in many areas of nursing from ED to med-surg to Critical care specialty units because of all the floating I do here. I don't like all the back-stabbing and caddiness and how us "floats" are used and abused with the worst assignmnents on the units.

Being in a monitoring program means just that.....being closely monitored. She is being drug tested 1-2 times per month and is most likely involved in some sort of group support with an addictionologist. Because of that she is probably more safe than the other candidates you have interviewed that could be abusing drugs and/or alcohol and you have no idea about it. This person has had to jump through many many hoops to be in that monitoring program. Even if she were to use a pt's info to try to get drugs ( and I can't figure out how that would work), don't forget that her urine is being closely monitored for drugs and alcohol so it would become apparent rather quickly if she had relapsed. Oh and don't forget that she also has mandatory meetings every week too with AA or NA. Just some more info about being in a monitoring program that you probably weren't aware of.

I'm not sure what you are on probation for since you do not specify but if you have been working for this company for a while then they know your work ethic and if you are in good standing with your evaluations then i would not worry. I would think that HR would rather hire someone they know (even with a probationary license) then someone they do not know. Also 6mos is hardly anytime at all Most of us have 3 year probations. So i would not over worry this situation. I would pray about it and keep it honest but only divulge what you absolutely have to about whatever the situation was that got you into trouble in the first place. Also tell only those who need to know.

I TOTALLY agree with everything you just said.. unfortunately I got scared when I got turned in by a neighbor for my recreational use and I would have said I was a crack addict if it meant I got to save my liscense and job. I was told by my addiction evaluator that if I didn't ayt least give him enough to diagnose me with abuse I would have to go before the BON and my liscense would be revoked. I am very frustrated to have to now be looked upon as though I am an addict with all the problems associated with that. My life before all this was great. I never used anything before or during work and am very resentful that I have to be moitored like this because my neighbor found out I smoked some pot on vacation. I refuse to say I am an alcoholic at The mandatory AA meetingsd I have to go to because I am not! The next three years will be the longest of my life and I think it is a very punative system that punishes us nurses for being human and making very human mistakes.

Thanx so much for giving me hope. Sometimes I feel like the next three years will take FOREVER! I know that one of my character flaws is impatience so I guess God is giving me quite the lesson. I have been practicing giving my fears and anxiety up to God every day and it is helping immensly. I still am not smoking and have not yet needed medication. Just today when I was giving a urine I asked the girl if they would close if the weather was bad enough tomorrow and she said "oh yeah probably and then what will you do" needless to say she is NOT one of my favorite people. Instead of obsessing over that. I prayed and realized that I do not have control over things like this and that God does and in the end everything will be ok. Don't worry....be happy!!

I have a question about small group therapy which is a part of my requirement for PNAP. It states in my contract that I must complete at least 6 mos of group therapy but not necessarily more than that unless deemed necessary by my therapist i/e family or work or recovery problems. Now lets talk about my therapist and his small group. First off, I am certain that his main purpose in life is to suck all the money out of us poor nurses and doctors and our insurance companies for as long as he can. I am in the program for smoking some pot on vacation and drinking 3-4 beers on my nights off of work, NEVER had a work issue and in fact have been considered an excellent employee all of my 20 years of nursing. My home life is very stable and I am 8 mos strong into my recovery, so I didn't think i would be required to do more than the minimum 6 mos. Anyway, in this group we talk about such all important issues as joining netflix, taking ski trips to vermont, going to church, etc. I pay 25$ /week plus my insurance kicks in 65$/week to this guy who nods his head and says absolutly nothing that has helped me in my recovery in any way whatsoever. I go to celebrate recovery and it has a small group that is free and i get MUCH more out of that. My question is, can I request a new therapist and do you think it is worth it at this point in the game or do all small groups run like this? This guy I am going to now says that his group runs for the full 3 years of my contract even though it is not required and how long it runs has nothing to do on my progress in my recovery, everyone gets the same duration of treatment. Can anyone relate with this situation?

Gee Jack, you have an uncanny way of hitting the nail on the head. I was raped at gunpoint 20 some years ago and i know that the only reason i have my sanity is because of my faith. I turned to God after that crises not away from Him. However I still has IBS for some time and panic issues. I have since worked through most of that buisness and am now able to talk about the event some without freaking out. I suppose some of my ETOH and pot abuse correlates to helping me deal or not deal with that (and some other issues in my past) but I know now I have finally come to accept that any abuse of a substance is the beginning of dependance and i am greatful that the Lord has spared me the misery some good people i know have suffered at the expense of dependence. I just have to not forget that prayer is key in keeping me healthy in all aspects of my life and I know that everything will be OK in the end. One day at a time. Oh and BTW I prayed about that blizzard that I was going to have to drive in (which probably would have trigered one heck of a panic attack) and I was cancelled from work that night...God is good!!

I would like to update everyone kind enough to give me advice on my extreme anxiety. I decided to turn the issue over to God and pray for Him to resole the issue. I wound up tsalking A LOT about the issues that I felt wwere causing me anxiety with my sponcer and close friends. I descovered that a couple of the issues causing me distress were fixable...e.g. I was stressing about getting my PNAP contract completed and sent back so I did what needed to be done to complete it and sent it back. Also I took Jack's advice and took a couple of hot baths and also walked my dog more often. I go to something called Celebrate Recovery which is a 12 step bible based progream desgned to help people like us and I found that to help immensly. So today I feel no anxiety and I actually feel great!. I am going into work tonite and we are getting socked with a blizzard and I still feel :Dno anxiety. I have decided to pray and leave it to God to take care of me. So thanx everyone again and pray that I make it back and forth to work safely!

Im from Pa and when my case worker told me that I would get the no nights restriction I argued that I had done nights for many, many years and that being switched to another shift early in my recovery would cause me a lot of stress they reconsidered and allowed me to work nights. However my only restriction is no ICU and that is temporary for 6 mos. I entered the program for marijuana abuse so what got you into the program and what state you are in I think has a big impact on what restricitons you get. Maybe you could talk to your therapist or case worker and argue the same case. I do know that keeping your stress level low when you go back to work is a priority.

OMG your story is so much like mine and you got only a year of monitoring....u are very lucky. I got three years for my recreational pot use. I however did not lose my job as a result so I guess I am lucky there. I had hoped that I woukd have gotten a lighter sentence but I guess that is not an option in my state. I also am using this experience to repair myself spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Good luck in your journey! Oh and I totally agree with you about how it's ok to get drunk every weekend but smoking some pot once in a while on your time off is a crime.

Cool! Thanx

i am new to this site so i am not sure how to "PM" someone. could someone clarify this for me.....thanx

Thank you all for your input. I think I have gotten a lot of very good feedback. The perfectionism suggestion by Jack really hit a nerve and I feel like that may be something I need to work on. (I have erased what I have written at least three times to rewrite it better) I do walk my dog pretty regularly but that is my only form of exercise but am sure I could use more. I tried to take a hot bath but found that I could not even relax in the tub and got out after only a few minutes. I am seeing my doctor later today to get his signature on my contract and wonder if maybe I should say something to him and see what he says? I am praying for peace of mind and I have also talked to my sponcer about this. She thinks I should talk to my doctor about it and screw what PNAP thinks. I'm not so sure about that however. Just talking about it has helped me feel better. My chest tightness has eased some and I do feel better. I hope this all makes sense as I have typed it on my phone so please pardon any typos.

I have been having ALOT of anxiety ever since getting into this program. I worry over EVERYTHING. I am paranoid that i will forget to call in for my urine or to send in some paperwork . I am very fearful that I won't survive the next three years with ALL these new obligations in addition to the old obligations I still have such as raising my children and working full time nights and cooking, cleaning, bills, etc.. I also quit smoking 7 months ago when the *!@# hit the fan and i think i regret that decision because smoking a ciggarette would help me deal with all this anxiety, however, I would be a fool to go back to smoking so that is NOT an option. The last time I quit smoking though, my doctor had to prescribe me celexa to help with my anxiety at that time. I think something like that might help me now but I am afraid to talk to my physician about it and get the prescription because it mat cause PNAP/VRP to think I am having difficulty dealing with my recovery or that I may relapse (which is the FARTHEST thing from happening). I just would like some advice on how to go about dealing with this or should I continue to just pray about it and kind of suck-it-up with no intervention or meds?

I agree with you about feeling like these programs treat you like a criminal. I got put into the program for smoking some pot on vacation far far away from work and now this whole thing has taken over my life for the next three years! I know if i had gotten caught by the law the sentence would have been ALOT less.