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Why are OR nurses frowned upon?
I believe OR nurses may be frowned upon because the speciality is misunderstood. The life behind the closed doors of the restricted areas can be likened to living in a foreign country for most RNs. The language is different, the culture is different, even the air is different (changed 15 times per hour)!! What most can't appreciate is the speed and intensity of the intranet-operative setting. Everything is "now" for the most part. OR nursing is physically demanding. Imagine that you must move all your patients, not just a few. OR nursing is definitely different an therefore, I think, misunderstood. Come visit for a few days. You might like it.
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Is it like this everywhere?
I agree that it is not always as you describe. The OR can be a very busy, high pressure place. It will get easier for you but it takes time to figure out what must happen now and what can wait. Be patient with yourself. If, however, the situation does not improve in a couple of months I'd advise having a talk with a nurse manager or charge nurse. A tired, over-worked nurse is unsafe.
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How to handle an abusive surgeon?
I understand your position, especially as a new graduate. Sometimes silence is the very best response. That being said please keep in mind that a hostile work environment is not only morally wrong it is illegal. Next time you need to speak with supervisors about abuse in the OR trying to work in the phrase "hostile work environment". Also make mention of this same phrase to Human Resources. This is technical speak to HR types, more like legal-speak, which will get attention. Alternatively, working hard to gain the respect and good-will of the surgeons over time will go a long way to overcoming this problem.
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How to handle an abusive surgeon?
I try to remember that the surgeons also have lives outside the OR - that is they face many of the same struggles, pains, and problems as we all do. In addition they are under a lot of stress - patient/procedure-wise, and, business wise. They can an do have bad days and tend to take it out on those closest to them - the ones they spend most time with. While there is no excuse for abusive behavior, such thoughts as those above may help US to have a different perspective on a surgeons behavior. Truly abusive behavior that is consistently demonstrated must be confronted as this impacts patient care. The OR nurse cannot provide safe care if distracted by an abusive surgeon.