I agree with this. Talk to her first. That may have been the 5th time that day she had to clean him up and she has other patients who would benefit more from her service. Granted, she should not have said those things to him, it is your job as the nurse to talk to her. And to him. When I have a difficult patient, I inform them that I will not run myself ragged trying to take care of them, when they can take care of themselves. I tell them I promote independence. He makes himself lose his dignity when he acts like that. No grown man should act like that to get someone to clean him up. My first thought was how inappropriate this is and he probably enjoys being cleaned up by women. Both situations need to be addressed, though. =) Good luck! I know how hard it is to talk to someone about their behavior and get a positive response.