That would be very scary, but I believe it is a blessing that you do not remember what happened. The best thing you can do is accept it as a learning experience and move on. I have made somewhat similar mistakes in the past with drugs, alcohol and sex, and the worst thing I did was dwell on them. You can't move backwards, and dwelling on this will just tear you apart. Counseling is a good start, and I am sure you and your husband will work through this. When you come out on the other end, you will look back and see that you are stronger and your marriage is stronger. Good luck!:wink2: