Need help

Zooey72 · Jun 21, 2016

A lot of variables there since you don't know where you will be in a year's time. If you are determined to follow him where he is deployed he may end up in Korea, or some other place that is not really conducive to your goals. I would suggest putting off marriage until you are more stable, but that's just me. It may not be romantic but it is practical. Or if when you are married you may just have to be apart. I don't think there are many nursing schools in Afgan., and while we have reduced troop levels there when the hard fighting is to be done, it is usually done by the marines.

Ultimately it will probably come down to sacrifice. One of you may not be able to do what you want to do. Welcome to marriage! The trick is to make the decision based off what is best for both of you as a team. My wife and I have a saying "Us before me".

To be with my wife I had to pick up and move from IL to TN. I left all of my friends and family behind to be with her. My wife has 3 daughters, so the sacrifice should be mine since a move for her would have disrupted her kid's lives. When I started going to college again I went instead of her because I already have a degree and would not need to take as many classes as she would have had to take. While I am in school she supports us (although before starting I worked and saved for several years so that we could afford me not working now), that is how she sacrificed for us.

Anyhow, that is my 2 cents.

daatadeen17 · Jun 21, 2016

Thank you for your input, I can see where your coming from amd your advice is very helpful! I wish well and thank you!

theonlycatu · Jun 21, 2016

My husband and I got married shortly after he enlisted in the army. We had been dating 4 years at this point. I ended up putting nursing school off for 7 years because we moved around so much (I did get an accounting degree in that time though, so it wasn't like I completely gave up all schooling). My husband is out of the service now and we live somewhere that we plan on staying for a long while. I start Nursing school in the fall and I'm honestly glad I waited. My son is in school now, so I'm able to attend classes during that time. I also have better focus now than I did just a few years ago.

My point is that you may want to weigh your options. It may be a good idea to get any prerequisites out of the way first and then see where you are after that point :)

Silverdragon102, BSN · Jun 21, 2016

Moved to the Nursing Career forum

LunaTunaPineapple · Jun 21, 2016

Hi Kiara,

I'm not married, but I agree with OnlyCatu. If nursing is something you're REALLY interested in, you may need to hold off on marriage long enough to get through school. My best friend's husband is in the military as well. They got married right out of high school ( 4 years ago) They move a lot and he's often gone for months at a time. She intended on completing her degree and starting her business. Things quickly changed when she realized that settling down wouldn't be as easy as she thought, especially since her husband's in for the long haul. They now have two children as well. Things happen quickly once you're out on your own. I would suggest an 12 month LPN program to start ( before you marry), then once you're able to settle for at least another year and a half, an LPN-RN transition program ( The one at my local college is 13 months). That way you can do your education in pieces. Best of Luck!!

jaycam, RN · Jun 21, 2016

A couple of the students at my school are doing long distance engagements and marriages while they finish school. You could do an ADN program and do that. I would say that you don't know yet where he will be deployed and if you'd even be allowed to go, or safe if you did. I always felt bad for the spouses stuck at home base because their SO was on deployment, but they knew no one and would of been happier back home. Also, having been the fiance at 18 who didn't want to wait, I promise that waiting won't take forever. If you two survive the waiting and the distance, you'll be better off, especially if he goes career. Be independent, learn to balance your life with his.

Haijun · Jun 22, 2016

Kiara, am I understanding correctly that you still have a year left of high school? When does your fiance go to bootcamp? What is his specialty/rating/mos going to be? Between bootcamp & his initial training, he'll likely have 6 months or more of training before he gets to his first duty station - where you can join him. If I had a better understanding of the timeline, I could offer more specific advice.