I'm so lost

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Ive been on this site reading stories since my incident. I dont want to get to into details as to give away my identity. I am a nurse in Florida. I got into trouble at work and was turned into the DOH with accusations of substance abuse and narcotic theft. I was never drug tested and I told them the medication found in my bag could have been anyones as we didnt have lockers and eveyone had access to our personal bags. I never had a drug discrepancy or accusation of diversion. The of last year I had a DOH investigator come knocking. I was distraught and confused so I gave a written statement but also have about 10 reference letters. I know I should have lawyered up but what was done is done. I then was told to go see a Addiction/ psychiatrist Dr and do intensive drug testing. Blood, urine ,and hair....7 months later and havent heard ANYTHING.

My question is from every story I've read ots usually the DOH giving you a list of Drs to go see and do testing and you are charged out of pocket. I was just given an appointment and told when to show up and not changed a dime. Why is this different from everything I've been reading?

Im still a complete reck. I refuse to allow anyone to answer any knocks on the door, I won't get any mail out the box till Saturday so that I'm mentally prepared for the worse. Im not working as a nurse but do have a job that uses my medical knowledge. I don't want to lose my license even though I don't want to be a nurse anymore.

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Hang in there. I understand. It took the board of nursing 3 1/2 years to get to my case. I self reported to the nursing board in feb 2016 , met with an investigator (should have gotten a lawyer) . Now I have a settlement conference with the nursing board next month, I’m consulting a lawyer and going to be prepared. I’ve been working as a nurse for 3 years with no alcohol or drug issues. I completed outpatient rehab in 2016. I tried inpatient rehab first but it didn’t work out - I left after 60 days of a 90 day program. I’m getting a lawyer because after this long I don’t think they should suspend my license. I understand monitoring since I did have a drug (pain pills) and alcohol problem. I’ve been clean so long now that I hope and pray the nursing board doesn’t stick it to me!

I was notified by the board via certified mail. From what I’ve seen that’s the norm. If they contact you lawyer up! Sure wish I would’ve had a lawyer in 2016 and not given a statement without one. I incriminated myself since I felt so guilty.

One day at a time! There’s a lot of support here so stay in touch! Good luck!

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Specializes in Med/Surg, Women's Health, LTC.

First things first, get the help you need to stay safe and sober (if that is an issue).

Second, get an attorney, and follow their advise.

Third, do NOT beat yourself up. Addiction can and does happen to anyone. You are not alone.

If 12 step programs are your thing, do that. If church is, do that. If therapy is, do that. But STOP beating your self up. Mistakes happen, what is done, is done and now you need to make a plan for moving forward.

Lurk here, on this forum, and reach out for help! Be kind to yourself.

We are all pulling for you!

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Indeed we are all pulling for you and many of us are in the same leaky boat.

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51 minutes ago, SpankedInPittsburgh said:

Indeed we are all pulling for you and many of us are in the same leaky boat.

Spank I’m about to be in that boat next month!! I meet with the board Oct 8 , after 3 1/2 years!!

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