Does it get better?

Hey!

I know what you're going thru...the accelerated BSN is fast-paced and an overwhelming amount of stuff thrown at you at once...especially the first two semesters. And I hated the first month in the hospital...the smells, the poop, the feeling of being in the way in the nurses' station, not knowing the routine. After a few months in the hospital it gets better.

I've been a new nurse for 6 months now...and I do cry about once a week when I'm driving home and I think about a patient...the young mom with the terminal disease wh cried to me that day about being stuck in the hospital. But I've changed my opinion about crying...I feel it's part of my life now and it's inevitable...it's a job where we connect with patients in the darkest time, during their struggle and when you take that in the stress of it has to go somewhere...it has to come out. So tears are a good thing, imo. I became a nurse to make a difference in their lives...but there's a price to pay for that blessing.

I think your first patients affect you more because they are your first ones. You will learn to cope with the sad stories as you get more experience. It is the nurses who don't care about their patients that would worry me.

As for your other concerns, I wouldn't worry about it. I too did an accelerated BSN and it wasn't until my last semester that I felt like I acutal had something to contribute when I entered the room. Standing around feeling uncomfortable, unsure and anxious isn't fun for anyone. But even if you don't feel like you're learning how to be a nurse, don't worry, you are! Low acuity med-surg really is a great place to start for clinicals, but therer are many, many areas of nursing that are nothing like it. I absolutely hated clinicals my first semester, 2nd and 3rd semester was a little better, and the last semester was by far the best. Even though I still hated med-surg nursing, by the end it felt so good to actually start feeling like a nurse, that I looked forward to going to clinicals.

It might be helpful if you try to figure out what it is you don't like about your clinicals now. Is it because you feel like you don't know what you are doing or supposed to do? Or because you don't like talking to the patients? Or something else? Also, what do you like about clinicals? Anything? The most important thing to do during clinicals aside from learning the nursing process is deciding what you do and don't like and why. If you don't like talking to patients, them consider working in the OR. If you don't like seeing all of the sickness and sadness, consider labor and delivery. There really is a type of nursing to fit every person!

I hated almost everyone of my clinicals except L&D. I was worried that I probably should change my career since I hated clinicals so much but being a nurse extern was the deciding factor for me to stay in the game. Now that I am a nurse on a med surg floor, I am glad I stayed in the game and finished nursing school. It's so different.

I hated nursing school and I LOATHED clinicals. Real nursing is so much better.

I hated almost everyone of my clinicals except L&D. I was worried that I probably should change my career since I hated clinicals so much but being a nurse extern was the deciding factor for me to stay in the game. Now that I am a nurse on a med surg floor, I am glad I stayed in the game and finished nursing school. It's so different.

This was me exactly. My externship showed me what real nursing was and it's nothing like clinicals.

I too was in an accelerated BSN program with no prior health care experience, per se. I had some related experience, but nothing like being in a hospital. Give yourself time to become used to the environment and the pace. Do not compare yourself and your experience to that of others, because everyone takes something different from the program. Make clinicals meet your needs (and your patients' of course!). Over time, you will feel more comfortable in your practice as a student nurse. Do not be ashamed of where you are- you're exactly where you're supposed to be. Even if you do not enjoy a particular cliniical experience/floor, take what you can and learn from the experience. You never know where you will end up, someday! Your patients will affect you in profound ways. If you are required to journal as part of your clinical paperwork, take this opportunity to reflect on these feelings and incorporate them into your way of thinking as a nurse. You are human and feel what you feel. Kudos to you for your compassion. Let this fuel your fire, but don't let it cloud your thinking about how best to care for YOUR patients while you are with them. The moment this ownership set in for me during clinicals, I started to feel more at ease. You will not, however, feel as though you've done this for years. Even those who have done this for years (so they tell me) don't feel entirely comfortable! Best of luck to you and lots of hugs. Sorry for rambling!