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Discussion

Thoughts During My First Weekend on My Own

I got hired on to a busy Med-Surg floor that is informally known as the stepdown for the CCU that is literally just down the hall. I trained in on fresh post-op transplant patients, COPD exacerbations, GI bleeds, lots of AKIs, and dialysis patients. Started picking up stable SIRS patients now that I am on my own. I had five weekends of training, and it was a whirlwind of excitement, fear, hope, and sheer faith.

This was my first weekend completely on my own. I started my day with four patients, one on the edge of sepsis, one severely hyponatremic, and two very emotionally needy patients who wished to be my only patient. We were at full strength...until four hours in, when we dropped to three nurses short and one aide short. We spent the whole weekend short. I considered myself lucky just having four...the more experienced nurses had five less stable patients. I found myself thinking some very odd thought while trying not to freak out the whole weekend.

So my collection of thoughts:

"No, I can't just print out a prescription. Yes, you do need to sign it. That's why you get the big bucks."

"Aw crap, spiking fever and hypertensive and tachycardic. I gotta tell my nurse. *$&^@!!! I am the nurse!"

"I get a lunch? What, at the end of my shift, right?"

"Dear Pharmacist. You are keeping a medication in the central pharmacy. It is ordered for twice a day, and cannot be collected by anyone other than a nurse. Do not be surprised if I am not interested in either waiting 15 mins in the hallway for this medication nor do I want to chat. Seriously."

"I wonder if [Competitor Hospital] is hiring non-bedside nursing positions."

"I should have majored in macrame."

"Screw proficiency, I just want to not kill anyone."

"I swore I'd get into Critical Care. I might go insane before then."

I'm going back. And at the end of each shift I just want to run out, my hair behind me, my feet sore, and I just want to scream "Everybody lives!!!!" a la the Ninth Doctor.

So what were some thoughts you had at the end of your first few shifts?

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    Hahaha. You have hit the nail on the head with most of these. When I first was on my own (just 5 months ago), when I gave report the oncoming nurse would ask me "what's the plan". There was one particularly rude nurse, who could not contain her exasperation when I told her that I had no idea what the plan was...I simply told her "Listen, they survived the night, anything else I was able to do is extra credit", that shut her up.

    I will add a couple more to your list

    1) "I did not know that one could feel this much pain in my feet"

    2) "Why yes, I would love to get you a Tums, even though you have send me to the med room three times... is there ANYTHING else I can get you"

    3) "Is McDonald's hiring"

    4) "They didn't teach me this in nursing school"

    5) "Crap, forgot to unclamp the piggyback antibiotic... again"

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    I don't know why, but I didn't see this update in my inbox!

    Yes yes yes re: the piggyback abx. That danged secondary line clamp will be the death of me.

    My second weekend alone I started wondering if hiring to a desk job was possible.

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    This is my first week off orientation. Here were some of my thoughts:

    "I would rather work mcdonalds than do this job"

    "I'm calling in sick my next shift. I can't possibly do that again."

    "I never realized I had to go into AKI and hypoglycemia to be a nurse."

    "If my pt goes into vtach one more time during this shift I give up."

    "First day on my own and they give me seemingly the most unstable pt on the unit...I see their tactic....they want to scare me off! Well...it's sorta working ?"

    "So. Many. Meds. All nurses do is give meds and chart."

    "I worked my butt off in school for 3 years to do this!?! What was I on?"

    "Speaking of being on something.....I think this job will send me into Xanax territory soon."

    "It has to get better...."

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    Those darn piggybacks! They still get me sometimes, 7 months later!

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