SmilingBluEyes...

Sure I can name some books that ARE VERY GOOD! I will post them here for you in a bit, ok???? Glad to help. I was once the very doormat everyone used to wipe their feet. NO more!!!

Be back in a bit w/some titles for you. Also, there are seminars and conferences on this very thing----keep your eyes open for them.ANY seminar about COMMUNICATION is valuable, believe me. Esp interpersonnel communications.

Here are some books I have actually read, give one or two a try:

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0553263900&itm=6userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0028619641&itm=4

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0446577723&itm=9

(I love Joyce Meyer---if you are not opposed to Christian-based instruction, she ROCKS)

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0800756525&itm=36

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0595282776&itm=40

(directed specifically to health care professionals---it's pretty good)

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0071424857&itm=4

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0130485195&TXT=Y&itm=10

Hope some of these help....

I am not endorsing Barnes and Noble---these can bought at many places, like Amazon, Half.com and other retailers.

Just a few more "pearls"..........

Like I said, look for seminars on communication skills and assertiveness in business.....they really do help. Also, truly, anything by Joyce Meyer works for me. I am not a religious person, but her common-sense approaches to making ourselves happy and confident---to look INWARD to please ourselves, really work for me.

My beliefs are these: When it comes to "assertion" many people get this mixed up with "aggression". Being assertive is really the antithesis to being aggressive. The happy, at-peace self-confident person need NEVER be aggressive to get her point across and be heard!

The person who believes in herself and has solid self-esteem can naturally assert herself in any situation. She realizes her colleagues and doctors/other professionals are HUMAN, fallable, beings just like herself. She learns how to communicate in a way that does not place others on the defensive, yet holds them accountable for their actions. There are a lot of fine lines here....things to learn. You learn these by finding who YOU ARE and believing in yourself, loving yourself enough to never be anyone's doormat. You learn these techniques by testing them out on colleagues and coworkers. You learn to paraphrase what they are saying to you , so they know you are listening. Open ears and open minds are the key. Make sure yours are open, first.

Good luck and and let me know if there is anything else I can do help you. It's been quite a journey for me, to find my own inner strength and be assertive in my daily interactions. Best wishes.

I cannot wait to check out these books!

Here are some books I have actually read, give one or two a try:

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0553263900&itm=6userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0028619641&itm=4

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0446577723&itm=9

(I love Joyce Meyer---if you are not opposed to Christian-based instruction, she ROCKS)

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0800756525&itm=36

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0595282776&itm=40

(directed specifically to health care professionals---it's pretty good)

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0071424857&itm=4

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=In0Ri5JAu6&isbn=0130485195&TXT=Y&itm=10

Hope some of these help....

I am not endorsing Barnes and Noble---these can bought at many places, like Amazon, Half.com and other retailers.

Just a few more "pearls"..........

Like I said, look for seminars on communication skills and assertiveness in business.....they really do help. Also, truly, anything by Joyce Meyer works for me. I am not a religious person, but her common-sense approaches to making ourselves happy and confident---to look INWARD to please ourselves, really work for me.

My beliefs are these: When it comes to "assertion" many people get this mixed up with "aggression". Being assertive is really the antithesis to being aggressive. The happy, at-peace self-confident person need NEVER be aggressive to get her point across and be heard!

The person who believes in herself and has solid self-esteem can naturally assert herself in any situation. She realizes her colleagues and doctors/other professionals are HUMAN, fallable, beings just like herself. She learns how to communicate in a way that does not place others on the defensive, yet holds them accountable for their actions. There are a lot of fine lines here....things to learn. You learn these by finding who YOU ARE and believing in yourself, loving yourself enough to never be anyone's doormat. You learn these techniques by testing them out on colleagues and coworkers. You learn to paraphrase what they are saying to you , so they know you are listening. Open ears and open minds are the key. Make sure yours are open, first.

Good luck and and let me know if there is anything else I can do help you. It's been quite a journey for me, to find my own inner strength and be assertive in my daily interactions. Best wishes.

"always a pleasure, never a chore"

glad to help. Let me know if there is ANYthing else I can do for you.

SmilinBluEyes,

Some of the links aren't working, could you please just provide the titles?

Thank you for your help

Sure, here you go:

Becoming Influential: A Guide for Nurses

Eleanor J. Sullivan

Approval Addiction: Overcoming Your Need to Please Everyone

Joyce Meyer

Women Who Try Too Hard: Breaking the Pleaser Habits

Kevin Leman, Kevin Lemon

Assertiveness Skills for Professionals in Health Care

Wendy D. Leebov

How to Use Power Phrases to Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say, and Get What You Want

Meryl Runion

Becoming Influential: A Guide for Nurses

Eleanor J. Sullivan

There is also a book called (I think) Assertiveness for Dummies (I have it some place) that is written in typical "Dummies bullet form" that you may like.

Hope this helps.

deb

Many thanks:flowersfo