Poppyfields00

...that's awful. I get travel time and mileage. I don't know the exact figures, let me check.

This last week, my job was difficult. Being a person who simply wants to fix things, I realize this: I cannot fix death. There is no magic wand in hospice care. Our victories are small, profound, and about a moment. Nothing more nothing less. I cannot make my patients well, again. What I can do, is provide serious mouth care. That damn dry mouth which comes with impending death. I want a magic wand to make it so, my patients ravaged with dementia can communicate. For one finding the right words is a source of anger. Can you imagine? Something hurts and communicating that is like moving a mountain. Yesterday, I learned nurses have a wisdom I dread. My dear patient, who I knew was having a "good" day by the number of punches he threw had labored breathing. His booming voice of protest was weaker. My dear patient's days are, really, numbered. His caretaker, his beautiful wife, looks at him like the day they were first married. Perhaps true love never dies.

That means so much to me, thank-you.

I think I will stay where I am. Yesterday, was surreal, I had a very saucy 90+ lady who is dying. This woman was throwing out jokes...and sass faster than I could count. I comforted her the best I could. Back rubs and touch help in some cases this was one.

My patient was a 93 year old lady who suffered from Alzheimer's. That particular day was wrought with gastro-intestinal issues for me, I let out a horrific burp right in front of this dear lady, apologized profusely. She said in a very lady like tone, "That's okay dear there is more room out here than in there."

That's a good question, I don't know. I don't see why you can't but I don't know.

I am so fortunate, one of the nurses I work with has been at it 41 years. She is a wealth of knowledge. She had to assess my competency, and YES, I was intimidated, and she tried to trip me up, (I, actually, appreciate it---it means she has faith in me...I CAN do it.) I was so focused on my patient, I did not realize she was doing that, and answered her questions. You don't know how good it feels to, actually, find my calling and do it well.

I am a hospice home health aide. I enjoy providing the best patient care I can. Frankly, this is a job I LOVE. However, we should always, always, challenge ourselves. IF I decide to, go on, and go to nursing school, as a nurse will I still provide patient care? I know there is way more paper work, responsibility, documentation, liability with nursing, BUT do nurses provide patient care?