RNatloss

Thank you so much for answering. I've tried many times to tell myself to let it go, that preceptor wasn't worth it but I find myself occasionally go over the ICU experience with the preceptor from hell over the years. I've had a few preceptors who never sugar coat anything but they were insightful and only critique on things I need to improve on so my confident was sky high bc I can take constructive criticism and I thought I have tough skin. But when I went into ICU the constant bombarding of criticism, that sometimes have nothing to do with nursing, began to erode. What I thought was a boulder size confident became a small pebble. Over the years, I rebuilt my confident but it never reach the size of what I had before. I don't know how to rebuild my confident anymore. Every time I see ICU listing I am reminded I failed.

I worked at both unionized and non-unionized hospitals before. With the unionized hospital I feel more protected but I get less pay. After paying my union dues, I ended up getting a couple hundred dollars less than what I am getting paid right at a non-unionized hospital. A couple hundred dollars less each month winds up to be a couple thousands a year. I have no opinion on unions. I know there are good ones and bad ones. I won't go out my ways to find one nor will I try to bypass non unionized ones.

Hello everyone, A few years ago I was hired for an ICU position. I was a telemetry prior to that with two years experience. Needless to say, I was extremely overwhelmed and had a preceptor who took it upon him to tell me everyday I'm not good enough, I'm not as good as him. My confident took a nose dive and I cannot function. ICU and I parted. Years later, I am now an ER nurse but there is still a part of me who cannot let go that I could not make it in the ICU. A part of me tell me to let it go, another part of me tell me to try it again. Part of my confidence never return after the experience with ICU. I always think I'm not good enough to be an RN but a larger part of me telling me I'm being stupid bc of course I can be and I am an RN. I find myself looking at ICU residency again. I'm sorry for the ranting but years ago when I started out as a brand spanking new nurse, you guys were there for me and now I really feel I needed your advises again. Thanks for reading my rant.

For right now I feel like I'm a fraud. Lol. I can't wait for the day I can confidently say yep, I'm an experienced RN. I'm just glad all the nurses I have been working with in the past and currently have been so kind. I'm knocking on wood that I'll never run into nurses that eat their youngs. I can't wait to be one of you guys who can just look at a chart and know exactly what is going on, what to do, and what to expect. Right now I'm just absorbing everything my preceptors are teaching me

I've been very blessed that I have these nurses who were willing to teach me and took me under their wings during my year at the LTC facility. Several of them mentored me and I'm so grateful for that. Now I'm in a hospital setting I'm excited but also hesitant because I don't enough to be really helpful but I'm working and doing my best. I ask a lot of questions and staying very humble. So far my preceptors and other coworkers have been really nice to me.

If you get another job offer at a LTC please take it while at the same continue to put in your applications at the hospitals. Just get that experience on your resume. Right now there are too many nurses and not enough jobs for us newbies. Good luck.

Update: hi everyone, I didn't get the job but a couple of months later I got another interview for the telemetry unit at another hospital and a week later got hired. I am currently in orientation and find myself overwhelmed. Although I have been an RN for over a year I find I don't know squat. Even the new grads know more than me. I am feeling inadequate and frankly stupid. Is it common to forget a lot of my knowledge after graduating and not using it?

I'll definately update once I get the news! Thank you to everyone that responded. It meant so much to know I can count on you guys to boost me up.

Thank you guys so much for the encouragement. I have less than a year of nursing experience at LTC. I always wanted to work in the acute care setting and had a hard time even getting a interview at a hospital so this is very important for me. I do not even know how to study or prepare myself and since the interview was last wednesday, it seemed a little too late to write the thank you letter.

Hi everyone, I was ecstatic when I got a call for an interview however, I was not given much time to prepare for the interview. I had two hours to get ready for the interview. I called up my friends who work at this hospital and were told that the interview was very laid back and easy. Did not asked any critical thinking questions and only asked a few personality questions. I rushed to get myself ready and head to the hospital. The interview with the nurse recruiter went well. Basically she told me about the HR stuff. Then I was sent to the unit to be interviewed by the manager and the charge nurse. I felt that I bombed the interview because they end up asking me critical thinking questions and I bombed it. They asked me to provide five words to describe my personality. That should have been easy right? Nope, I had to squeeze the last of my brain juice to come up with five words. The interview was nothing like how my friends describe it. At the end of the interview, the manager said they can not count my one year nursing experience and I may be consider more of a new nurse. However they don't know if they have the resources to hire another new nurse. So I bombed it and suddenly I really just want to get out of there, however, she then said why don't you come back on Tuesday for a shadowing. So I am so confused and stressed that I haven't been able to sleep well at all. I had tried to write a thank you letter but unable to because what can I truly say other than thank them for granting me an interview? I can't sell myself because I sucked at the critical thinking questions. I've been trying the last couple of days to write a decent thank you letter but unable to come up with words to describe myself. Other than hard working, reliable, and wanting to learn, I can't come up with fancy words to sell myself and have them choose me. Sorry everyone, I just want to rant awhile. Whoever reads this, thank you.